>>263
So anyway, about ten months ago, I went to Yoshinoya at Hongkou Football stadium, you remember that Yoshinoya?
The place was deserted and you had just said goodbye to a friend on the holidays. Your Chinese girlfriend broke up with you a few weeks previously. The guilt of cheating on your girlfriend at home had gotten a little too much and had started manifesting itself. You were very lonely. You had gotten a haircut earlier that day and there was an insane number of people there. Probably because of the discount they gave in Saturdays. It didn't really matter though.

I think you were trying to game a girl into a date, but you were so pressed for time for whatever imaginary reason, you broke it off when she said you still have a girlfriend. I don't think you cared, you just wanted some kind of brief connection.

You had bought chalk for weightlifitng in a hiking shop nearby a few weeks ago. You walked Hongkou's streets and alleys for hours afterwards. You spoke to no one, and bought yogurt in a konbini. People commented on how fat you were getting.

You were struggling to find a worthy internship.
I think you would have liked to talk to the staff a bit more. I think China really fucked you up and you are still unravelling all the shit that went down when you were there.

You still don't know how to describe it to people. You are afraid of sounding weak. Even your girlfriend doesn't know about the days you shut yourself away and survived on milk. How you stuttered when you talked to strangers. How paranoid you became. How you lied and manipulated your way into sex, and lied to her in order to manipulate her into spending her life savings to visit you for a month.

You used people as objects. They used you.

...I could really use some extra onions in my beef bowl right now.