Yesterday, I went to Yoshinoya... (343)

1 Name: lolocaust!rsvcwx6Axc 2004-12-04 15:10 ID:HVt1OSAA [Del]

... and I farted.

294 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-7363 15:11

So I went to Panda Express and had the Teriyaki chicken bowl with chow mein and an eggroll. It was okay.

I like the kind of bouncy pop Chinese folk muzak they play there.

295 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-7787 23:56

>>289
There was an insane amount of people there and I couldn't get in, because Komachi was slacking off again.

296 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8159 17:18

Now, take it from a Yoshinoya veteran. The latest thing among the Yoshinoya pros is this: Extra green onions. That's the ticket. A large bowl with extra onions, and egg. This is what someone who knows his shit orders. They put in more onions, and less meat. A large bowl with the raw egg, that's really fucking awesome. Now, you should know, if you keep ordering this, there's a risk employees might write you up. This really is a double-edged sword. I really can't recommend this for amateurs.

297 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8159 19:17

Okay, so I actually made a trek to the mecca. You know, Yoshinoya. I'd read so much about it over the past decade of lurking message boards. Now I was in Japan and had a chance. It wasn't super crowded like in the original rant. But I did feel a bit stupid because I was basically the only single guy there, plus I was a weeaboo wearing an anime shirt. Everybody else was a group of friends, or a family, or a giggling couple or some shit.

I sat down at the U-shaped counter and saw there was some 10% off deal if you tweet or instagram a Yoshinoya selfie. Okay, I expected some nonsense but give me a fucking break. You social media fucknuts. Nobody should post their stupid face online. Especially not at Yoshinoya. This isn't a fucking 5-star Michelin restaurant. It's the Japanese equivalent of Mickey D's. There were a couple of annoying squealing gyaruz caked with too much makeup, trying to shoot a selfie that included both their faces and their greasy bowl of beef. You think that's fucking attractive? Do you really need that 10% off? I want to fuck 10% of your faces off.

I knew Yoshinoya wasn't going to be like the rant, but I didn't know it would be this mind-bogglingly disappointing. So anticlimactic, so boring. It was just another venue for the smoldering ranks of normal people. I was hoping there would be at least one otaku like myself. The type of person who visits anonymous message boards and knows the True Meaning of Yoshinoya. We could exchange knowing looks from opposite sides of the U-shaped counter. Maybe even have a knife fight.

But whatever, I tried to focus on my task. I was getting ready to order extra green onions, like the guy in the original rant. I was hoping that would be the secret code to unlock the cool side of Yoshinoya that I'd been waiting for. They would put my name on a list and wink at me.

But the guys next to me order first. And one of them orders a large bowl with egg and extra green onions.

Okay, what the fuck. Stop making it sound like "extra green onions" is a thing that normal people get. That should be reserved for people like me who are in-the-know. Lonely internet people who grew up on message boards. Not boring shits like you who have 500 friends on facebook or whatever.

I want to interrogate them for roughly an hour. Do you understand what you're doing? Do you know the true meaning of "extra green onion?" Do you know how many Yoshinoya rant parodies I've written and read in my time? Have you even heard of 2ch?

I gave up. Yoshinoya wasn't anything like I'd hoped. The dream was dead. So I got the daily special.

298 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8161 04:36

I went to Yoshinoya and had the beef bowl. It was okay. Nobody got stabbed.

299 Name: (LtMG) : 1993-09-8285 03:19

yosinoya wassoi

300 Name: (LtMG) : 1993-09-8285 03:20

yosinoya wassoi

301 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8285 06:23

>>299
>>300
What the hell were you thinking, bumping an ancient thread like this? And bumping it twice!? I oughta stab you from across a U-shaped table!

302 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8285 14:21

Close your face. This is quite possibly the best thread on the whole of 4-ch!

303 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8285 17:05

At Yoshinoya, we not only serve up fresh and wholesome food, we serve up excitement.

304 Name: (LtMG) : 1993-09-8286 13:54

>>301
yosinoya wassoi

305 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8309 03:10

>>1 from such a thing, me Choi To hear. Thread the massage does not matter.
During this time, I went in the neighborhood Yoshinoya. Yoshinoya.
And then I'm a person does not sit in a mess full of something.
In, well have dropped banners something I saw, 150 yen off, it is written Toka.
I anymore, and Ahoka. Fool or a.
You guys that, I'm Ne Kiten to Yoshinoya do not come 150 yen discount Shiki is usually, blur.
It 's 150 yen, 150 yen.
Something also to have Toka parents and children. Do Yoshinoya in the family of four people. Over to your Medellin.
Alright daddy TokuSakari asked would do'll over, Toka're saying. No Ran look anymore.
You guys that, the seat Arcaro because do 150 yen.
The I Yoshinoya Do not, you're such should have been more brutal.
When quarrel and the guy sitting across from the U of shaped table is not amusing even begun,
Either stabbed or stab, or Ne Ja do such atmosphere is good. Women and children are, Now go sit in the corner.
In, if I thought you finally sit down, guy next door, the Nuo DaiSakari rainy season, we have said there.
So also it is cut spotted.
Anona, I Ne Hayan extra juice Nante Kyobi. Blurring.
What, extra juice in, it was a proud face.
You really want to ask whether you want to eat the soup duct. I want confronted. I want confronted small one hour.
You, whether I Chau just want to say I extra juice.
Now if you do not mind my saying so from my Yoshinoya through, after all the latest epidemic of between Yoshinoya through,
Negidaku, that's it.
Large serving green onions Nuo Gyoku. This is asked how through.
The I Negidaku has entered into generous is green onion. Son instead of meat is rather less. this.
In, it piled high Gyoku (egg). This strongest.
But ask this is also associated with the risk of being marked clerk from the next, double-edged sword.
The amateur can not be recommended.
Well you, >>1, was elaborate let also ate at Ushisake set meal.

306 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8309 12:37

Okay, so I actually made a trek to the mecca. You know, Yoshinoya. Ifd read so much about it over the past decade of lurking message boards. Now I was in Japan and had a chance. It wasnft super crowded like in the original rant. But I did feel a bit stupid because I was basically the only single guy there, plus I was a weeaboo wearing an anime shirt. Everybody else was a group of friends, or a family, or a giggling couple or some shit.

I sat down at the U-shaped counter and saw there was some 10% off deal if you tweet or instagram a Yoshinoya selfie. Okay, I expected some nonsense but give me a fucking break. You social media fucknuts. Nobody should post their stupid face online. Especially not at Yoshinoya. This isnft a fucking 5-star Michelin restaurant. Itfs the Japanese equivalent of Mickey Dfs. There were a couple of annoying squealing gyaruz caked with too much makeup, trying to shoot a selfie that included both their faces and their greasy bowl of beef. You think thatfs fucking attractive? Do you really need that 10% off? I want to fuck 10% of your faces off.

I knew Yoshinoya wasnft going to be like the rant, but I didnft know it would be this mind-bogglingly disappointing. So anticlimactic, so boring. It was just another venue for the smoldering ranks of normal people. I was hoping there would be at least one otaku like myself. The type of person who visits anonymous message boards and knows the True Meaning of Yoshinoya. We could exchange knowing looks from opposite sides of the U-shaped counter. Maybe even have a knife fight.

But whatever, I tried to focus on my task. I was getting ready to order extra green onions, like the guy in the original rant. I was hoping that would be the secret code to unlock the cool side of Yoshinoya that Ifd been waiting for. They would put my name on a list and wink at me.

But the guys next to me order first. And one of them orders a large bowl with egg and extra green onions.

Okay, what the fuck. Stop making it sound like gextra green onionsh is a thing that normal people get. That should be reserved for people like me who are in-the-know. Lonely internet people who grew up on message boards. Not boring shits like you who have 500 friends on facebook or whatever.

I want to interrogate them for roughly an hour. Do you understand what youfre doing? Do you know the true meaning of gextra green onion?h Do you know how many Yoshinoya rant parodies Ifve written and read in my time? Have you even heard of 2ch?

I gave up. Yoshinoya wasnft anything like Ifd hoped. The dream was dead. So I got the daily special.

307 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8394 16:08

Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. That it's really related to this thread.
I went to Yoshinoya a while ago; you know, Yoshinoya?
Well anyways it was really quite a spiritual experience.
I pushed open the doors and the scent of beef broth wafted out in great misty coils.
The incessant chatter of diners merged into a low roar, like the sound of a waterfall in the distance.
Papier-mâché families of four waltzed across the floor in front of me, identical grinning masks on each of their faces.
Repressing a shudder, I pushed through the crowds of shifting flesh to the counter.
A chorus of angels descended from among the 150 yen off banners hanging from the ceiling.
In an undulating aria a glowing, maternal voice told me it's okay to want extra sauce.
I would not be deceived, however. "Extra-large, with extra green onion" I intoned confidently, with a voice like thunder.
Double-edged swords fanned out from behind the woman at the counter like a peacock tail.
I patiently waited for my bowl, then took a seat at one side of a U-shaped table.
The men on the other side were holding daggers, but I knew they could never dare stab a Yoshinoya veteran such as myself.
With a jolt of vertigo, I looked down into my bottomless extra-large bowl.
The bubbles of grease floating on the surface spiralled round and round, faster and faster, as I plunged deeper into the maelstrom.
Machine elves danced on rafts of beef, dodging the countless bits of green onion zipping to and fro.
Streams of \100 and \50 coins floated inwards like confetti.
I knew somewhere deep within the fractal vortex was the spirit of Yoshinoya.
From her, I could learn the secret, the key: the perfect Yoshinoya dish.
I had to know.
I wouldn't even mind if the price was a tad higher, or if I were marked by the employees from next time on.
I would learn the secret, even if I had to interrogate her for over an hour.
At the vital moment, however, some idiot next to me said "Alright, daddy's gonna order the extra-large."
My concentration wavered. The moment was lost.
I wasn't even angry. I just got up and left.
A single glance back at the steam still rising from my untouched bowl, then I was gone.
What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should really just stay away from LSD if you know what's good for you.

308 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8580 03:42

I always order my steak medium-rare. Unless, of course, I'm sitting at a table in a steakhouse with a large group of people. In that case it's not so simple. I'm a gentlemen, so I never just go ahead and order first. I'll hold off for somebody else to start, and then I'll wait until it's my turn to order. Chances are, somebody else is going to order their steak medium-rare. I'm telling you, it's the best way to have a steak. But then the waiter will come around to me, gAnd for you sir? How would you like your steak prepared?h I can't say medium-rare now. I'll look like I have no idea what I'm doing. I'll look like I've never ordered a steak before, and now I'm just copying everybody else.

This is why it's great to order first at a steak place. Everyone else is definitely going to get their steak medium-rare. So when you order first, you look like you're in charge, like everyone else is following your lead. Then the second person also says medium-rare. gVery good, sir.h And maybe he really did want his steak medium-rare. It all depends on how fast he said it. If there was even a second's hesitation, it would be perfectly obvious that he was probably going to go for medium, but he didn't feel like being outdone by the first person. gI'll take mine medium c rare. Medium-rare.h A classic rookie I've-never-eaten-in-a-steakhouse-with-a-large-group-of-people mistake.

And then it goes down the line, medium-rare, medium-rare, medium-rare. But now everybody ordering, the fifth, sixth, seventh, even if they wanted medium, medium-well, it's just not happening. Nobody's going to stick their neck out like that. By the third or fourth person, the waiter is only even asking because he has to, because it's part of his job description. Bosses always gets really pissed when waiters try to save some time, try to cast out a blanket, gmedium-rares all around?h question to the table.

Every once in a while the waiter will start off with a person who clearly doesn't know how to eat steak and they'll say medium or medium-well. And the next person will order theirs, extra loud, medium-rare, as if to say, please don't confuse me with my idiot friend to my left, I'd like mine medium-rare. Please. And it'll go down the line, medium-rare, medium-rare, and after two or three people, that first guy will realize his mistake, and he'll get really embarrassed, and he'll just shout out to the waiter, who's already passed him, and he'll say, gExcuse me, you know what? I'm going to go for that medium-rare also, thanks.h And the waiter will say, gVery good, sir,h and he'll pretend to cross out something on his pad and write in something else, but it will all be an act, because he's not writing anything at all. It's always medium-rare. The first person always changes to medium-rare after everyone else orders medium-rare. It's a science.

But then it gets to me, maybe I'm like the eighth or ninth person ordering. And I'm no follower, I'm no nameless face in a crowd. So I'll say grare, please.h And everyone drops their fork and stares. I learned this trick at my friend's wedding in Iowa last summer. The rehearsal dinner was at this steak place, and the specialty was rib-eye. Delish. Of course I was going to order medium-rare, but the first person ordered rare. I was like, what? Rare? Crazy. But then the second person ordered. Rare. Third, fourth, fifth. Rare, rare, rare. There was definitely a pattern here and it became clear to me how I'd have to order my steak.

I really hope that someday I'm out to dinner with a bunch of guys and for some reason it's my turn to order first. And I'm definitely going to order rare. And I know that that second person is just going to have to order rare also. And it'll be like dominoes, everyone falling in line, everyone getting a rare steak. I'm pretty sure that's what happened in Iowa. I think.

309 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8595 08:06

Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. It's not relevant to typical "real life", but. I went back to university to get my master's degree; you know, learn a little more, earn a little more? Well anyways I couldn't walk to a class from the parking lot and had to take a detour. Turns out there's now a Chipotle on campus and the "line" is out the door.

For fuck's sake. I don't remember being such a dumbass as a freshman. This is not hard, you just leave a path for people to go past. It's just a combination of vaguely Mexican cuisine that you could prepare with ingredients from the Whole Foods just off campus, you hipsters.

There's even a letter-sized Xeroxed poster for a "safe space" here. Not the real kind for gay kids to escape beatings, but the stupid kind with puppy videos and ball pits. Holy fucking shit.

"I was thinking about getting the bowl this time." Oh my God. You guys, I've got half a mind to throw tortillas at you freaks.

The campus should be anything but safe. Nerds stealing your student ID magstrip, jocks flexing their sheer physical prowess, pinko commies ready to bash the fash, none of these smarty-pants are actually smart enough to de-escalate any challenge to their preconceived notions. Campus rioting: that's what you're paying half your old man's salary to be here for. If you wanted safety you should've gotten your degree online.

Anyways, I had cleared the corner and I hear this fat fuck say "mild salsa." Who in the world gets the mild only, pantywaist? I want him to see me stare in disapproval of his obviously non-functional gut. I want to stare into his soul. I want to put the fear of God in him. Say mild one more time, motherfucker.

No, if you want to be truly fashionable, what you add is the fajita topping. That's right, fajita topping is the true way to show you know what you're doing. It does mean you get more onion than salsa. Your burrito's structural integrity may be at stake yet it's worth it for the taste aloe.

But if you order this, there's a chance the employees will shaft you on meat next time; it's a serious backfire. Never do this before your junior year.

What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should allot more time to get to class.

310 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8595 13:53

dicks out for Harambe

311 Name: im gay : 1993-09-8784 09:47

lol.

312 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8977 20:22

I didn't go to Yoshinoya.

I went to Wendy's.

313 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8977 23:35

I went to Yoshinoya in Delhi once and got a Russian escort.

314 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8977 23:43

>>313
Was she extra-large?

315 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8994 04:07

Does anyone here have access to a fax machine?

316 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8994 11:52

>>315 Do you really need to use a fax machine, or did you just want to have a go at typing "fax machine"?

317 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8994 15:02

>>316
I am curious if anyone has a fax machine!

318 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8994 18:21

There's a Motel 6 near me that still uses a dot matrix printer for receipts.

319 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8994 18:25

I'd love to have a dot-matrix printer, for like, art projects.

320 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8994 19:40

I am thinking of making a project involving fax machines!

321 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-8994 20:08

I do, in fact, have no fax machine.

322 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9000 09:46

Still seeking a fax machine otaku!

323 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9000 10:26

I do, in fact, have no fax machine.

324 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9000 10:28

Still seeking a fax machine otaku!

325 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9000 19:43

Dental plan! Lisa needs braces!

326 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9001 05:27

I wish they left that scene in. Just imagine if the west became more accepting of DQN. By keeping that scene in it would possibly prompt more adults to research it and get converted into DQN fans (I am one myself), in turn increasing the amount that is imported and thus increasing DQN revenues in Japan, therefore increasing the amount of content created. We may have actually had big names like Daddy Cool, who has made his fair share of VIP threads, start to produce DQN threads too. The more accepting the public is, the less of a big deal DQN would be and so we'd finally have superbly entertaining threads involving Grandpa, mittens, fancy hearing cake, and DQN music.

There just aren't enough anonymous text boards in the west, and the Japanese are leading the way and leaving us behind. Not to mention we don't get 2-ch jokes translated fast enough. Only a few high profile 2-ch jokes get translated quickly, but because we don't demand it in the west then there's no commercial involvement and we have to rely on fan 2-chers (Those kind souls), and so we miss out on a lot of the more niche jokes. I don't only read DQN for the current thoughts or even the character threads, I read it for the fantastic way people are able to post whatever they want. When was the last time you heard the phrase "the only surviving legend of socotion gomez." Never, that's when you last heard that in normal forums. You know, not to mention that "im gay" sounds much cuter and less serious when it is mumbled by an anonymous poster, versus "I'm gay".

There's things that DQN can do also that no regular text board could. Kopipe is one of God's greatest inventions, the way that a single Yoshinoya rant can have so many humorous variations is incredible. My soul survives on kopipe coupled with the cute ramblings of mindbroken DQN users. And of course ascii art is nothing compared to the SJIS/UTF art many amazing Japanese men (maybe women) draw. The text art in parts of 2-ch is better than anything which has came out of Italy in the past 1000+ years. Truly mind blowing stuff. The way they can make Aramaki Scaltinof seem so soft and puffy, the way they can perfectly sculpt Mona, the way they can get the absolute perfect amount of white space between characters and the way they can make plaintext look like the softest, most delicious things in existence. Messenger software in the west often use emoji which looks like it's straight from Cartoon Network. Whereas 2-ch users in Japan make text art which looks like it's straight from the mind of a man with the greatest tastes.

Just imagine how much more advanced humanity would be, how much we'd progress, how much happier we would be as a whole if it was just acceptable to post whatever you were thinking on DQN. The fact that Japanese man have smaller cocks than us in the west is no surprise when you consider how large their brains must be to come up with the most entertaining threads known to man.

This is the sort of future we miss out on when mentions of DQN are cut from mainstream american sitcoms.

327 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9031 16:30

Yesterday I went to the Shangrila Marshmallow Dreams Maid Cafe in Akihabara.

328 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9031 20:10

>>327
Was she extra-large?

329 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9031 21:23

Did she have extra sauce if you know what I mean?

330 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9032 16:22

Did you Bangor?

331 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9032 16:28

Or did you hardly Newark?

332 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9032 16:29

332

333 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9032 16:29

333GET

334 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9052 16:49

Alright, so, the scene. We're in... I think it was South Carolina, or Tennessee? My friends and I have just finished playing in a card tournament (not a cool one, just Magic). We stop by Jack in the Box in the way home.

One of our guys has to pee. He goes in, and walks back out 5 seconds later. He's got that half smile half shocked look. "Guys, you have to come see this".

We walk in and it is just a disaster. The entire bathroom is a problem. There's a huge shit in 2/3 of the urinals, blood all over the floor... and the cherry on top is the coat hangar COMPLETE WITH FETUS in the toilet.

Well, I have to pee too, and the bathroom is already a mess, so my buddy and I back up and piss into the same urinal. We're pretty far back from it to, 3 or 4 feet away trying to get the highest arc. There are still a couple of our magic team in the bathroom watching this transpire. I don't remember who won. I think in a way we all did.

We exit the bathroom and an old black man sees us walk out. One of our group has already gotten our food, which is good. The old man goes in, and comes out with a look of pure... Disappointment and hurt. Like... "how could the human race have done this, and why would they do this to me?" and he looks into our souls with this look, as if we were responsible for all of it.

He goes to alert an attendant and I don't want to explain to the middle aged manager lady that we didn't abort into her toilet (we just pissed all over the urinal) so we grab our food to go and eat in the car. I'll never forget that guy's face though.

Anyway, that was my real life lesson in broken window theory.

335 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9052 17:20

>>334 this isn't kopipe but it should be, so I'm stealing it. good job

336 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9052 21:56

>>334
and then everyone clapped

337 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9055 15:56

Hey, listen to me for a moment, a'ight? I don't care if it's not related to this chat. Just listen!
Yesterday, I went over to the Ristorante di Milano for a simple meal. Yes, THAT Italian restaurant, Ristorante di Milano.
But the whole restaurant was so crowded, I couldn't even find a seat for hours!
Then I saw a poster that said "Special offer! €12 discount".
I thought to myself... geez, that's so fucking amazing.
You guys don't even normally visit Ristorante di Milano.
All you bastards came here just for that stupid-assed €12 discount.
Just for those 12 Euros. TWELVE FREAKIN' EUROS!!
Then I saw some parents & children. A family of four eating out at the Ristorante di Milano. Damn, so much for that bitch's home-cooked family feast.
Then one of the little brats said "Daddy's gonna order a large Bruschetta Fegatini". I couldn't believe it! Uuuuuggh, are you out of your fucking mind!?
Shiiit, i'll pay you €12 just to move your stanky fat-ass out of a seat.
Dude, you just don't go to the Ristorante di Milano for that lala-oh-i'm-so-happy dinner bullshit.
It's where you pick a fist-fight with the fucking guy sitting across 'yah in that U-shaped table. Kill or be killed. Heh... now that's the kinda shit I like.
Ladies, kids, stand back... 'cuz everything's gonna get FUCKED UP NOW.
After waiting for ages, I finally found an empty seat. But then, the guy next to me ordered by saying "A large Neopolitan pizza with a LOTTA' pepperoni".
Dude, that just pissed me off even more. Shit, you just don't say "lotta' pepperoni" nowadays, ya' freaking bastard.
How the fuck can you say "lotta' pepperoni" with that "oh, i'm so fucking cool, hur-hur-hur..." look!?!?
Damn, I was THIS CLOSE to standing in front of his face and yelling "DO YOU EVEN LIKE EATING THAT MUCH FUCKIN' PEPPERONI!?"
For a freaking hour, I was THIS CLOSE to doing that.
Shit, I bet you just wanted to use the words "lotta' pepperoni" out loud. Wow, you're so clever. Dude, you gotta be like ME. See, now I know what's "all that" in the Ristorante di Milano. What's cool right now to say is "Pennette con Ricotta & Melanzane".
That's it! You see now, a large pasta serving with aubergines & ricotta is what the hardcore Ristorante di Milano freaks eat. Like ME.
Saying "Pennette con Ricotta & Melanzane" means that won't get a pizza, but they put a WHOLE MESS of pasta.
Mmmmm... a lotta pasta, now THAT'S what I call a meal.
But anywhoo... ordering that is kinda' like a double-edged sword. Cuz' then the waiters might notice you the next time you come by.
So yeah, I can't reccomend this to noobs.
For you, just go order a Prosciutto e Melone al Ventaglo. That's as far as you can go, you know what i'm sayin'?

338 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9057 03:03

Yesterday, I went to Yoshinoya near my house, Yoshinoya.
Then, there were a lot of people and I couldn't sit.
And so, I found a banner which said"150yen off!".
SighcIt's idiot, it's foolc

Hey you! Don't come to Yoshinoya, which you don't often come to, only because 150yen off! Idiot!!
150yen! Only 150yen!

It seems there are families. Did You come to Yoshinoya with 4 family? A happy event!
A dad said "Year! I'd like the largest size!". I can't endure.
You! I'll give you 150yen, and give your seat to me!

Yoshinoya should be brutal.
Men toward U-shaped table may start to fight. Stab, or stabbed. Such air is good, isn't it? Come home girls and children!

Long time later, I could sit. Then A man sitting next to me says "Big size Tsuyudaku(Juicy)" and so on.
I lost my temper again!
Don't you know? Tsuyudaku isn't the current fashion! Poor!
Don't say Tsuyudaku with proud look!
I wanna ask if you really wanna eat Tsuyudaku. I wanna ask you. I wanna ask you for an hour.
Dont' you only wanna say Tsuyudaku?

Me,Yoshinoya expart, will tell you. The latest fashion among Yoshinoya expart is Negidaku. This is!
"Big size Negidaku Gyoku". This is an expart order.
Negidaku means more Negi(long onion) but less meat. This.
And Big size Gyoku(raw egg). This is perfect.

But if you order this, it's possible the stuff mark you. It's a double-edged sword.
I don't recommend this to beginners.
I think you beginners should order Gyu-Shake Teishoku(rice with meat and salmon) and like this.

339 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9058 00:23

Anyways, >>334, please listen to me. That it's really related to this thread.
I went to the bathroom a while ago; you know, bathroom?
Well anyways there was an insane number of people there, and I couldn't get in.
Then, I looked at the banner posted on the door, and it had "For Customers Only" written on it.
Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots.
You, don't go to the bathroom just because it's for customers only, fool.
It's only so people don't shoot up in there for crying out loud.
There're even entire families here. Family of 4, all out for some bodily functions, huh? How fucking nice.
"Alright, daddy's gonna take an extra-large shit." God I can't bear to watch.
You people, I'll pay for your regular size soda if you get off that toilet seat.
The bathroom should be a bloody place.
That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the sink can start a fight at any time,
the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that's what's great about this place.
Women and children should screw off and stay home.
Anyways, I was about to start pissing, and then the bastard beside me goes "I'mma shit in this urinal."
Who in the world shits in the urinal nowadays, you moron?
I want to ask him, "do you REALLY want to shit in the urinal?"
I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour.
Are you sure you don't just want to try saying "shit in the urinal"?
Coming from a bathroom veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, coat hanger abortions.
That's right, coat hanger abortions. This is the vet's way of using the bathroom.
Coat hanger abortions mean blood all over the floor. But on the other hand you're no longer teen pregnant. This is the key.
And then, it's disgusting. This is unbeatable.
However, if you do this then there is danger that you'll be marked by the employees from next time on; it's a double-edged sword.
I can't recommend it to amateurs.
What this all really means, though, is that you, >>334, should just stick to wearing adult diapers.

340 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9067 03:45

I am looking for a kopipe, it can't be Yoshinoya (thats japanese for ramen) or any overused meme. It has to be of 2 or more bun (thats japanese for 2 sentences) and has be be chibi (small) sized. And has to be really okashii (funny). Also It has to be about 10-20 internets. And the seller has to post screenshots of it first (i wanted to make shure it was okashii [funny]). And it would have been nice if it came with matching Ascii Art (WITH witty comments). OH! and it CANNOT have had any weeaboo text, or been made up. It has to be made of real-life experiences, or something like that. Also it would have be nice if it was made in japan. and not in china or corea (korea) or whatever. I have found a kopipe similar to the one im describing in 4chan, but it was 1 bun, and i didnt want my tsuri (trolling) to touch my other posts (it can get wet and i would not like that, plus 2 compartments is more okashii).

341 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9130 04:13

@@@@@| _
@@@@@|DM) No one is here.
@@@@@| I can order the extra large now !
@@@@@|

@@@@@@@@@@
@@@@^ _@@@ DADDY'S GONNA
@@@ R(LDM;) @@ORDER
@@@@@(@ ) @@@THE EXTRA
@@@@@@LARGE

@@@
@^ _@@@DADDY'S GONNA
Ri;LDMjɁ@@HAVE IT
(ց@ ) @@@WITH EXTRA
>@@@@SAUCE

342 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9158 23:51

I used to live in Japan and my friend came to visit and wanted to go to a maid café. For reference, a maid café is a place in the nerdy part of Tokyo where people go in and basically have a cutesy high pitch voiced Japanese girl dressed as a maid serve and talk to them.

So I was translating and very uncomfortable by the whole thing but my friend was getting a kick out of it which made it a bit easier. Next to us though was this obese boy of maybe 15 years old. You could tell he was what they call an otaku and lacked a lot of common hygienic practices. So we're eating and his maid comes over and squats down next to him to check on him. He reaches into his nostrils pulls out this huge booger with a long string of goopy snot still tethered to his nose and eats it in front of her. True to character she just gleefully exclaims, "Was it good master?!"

I thought I was going to vomit right there. I was so grossed out and overcome by feelings of pity for that poor girl, I really was just totally overwhelmed.

343 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9168 14:10

Vel, drit i det, >>1. Dette har ingenting å gjøre med denne tråden, men jeg vil at du skal høre på meg en liten stund. Jeg klarte ikke engang å finne et sete. Så jeg så meg litt rundt, og fant et skilt der det sto "20 kroners rabatt". Hva i helvete er galt med dere folk? Er dere idioter eller noe? Dere ville vanligvis aldri engang tenkt å dra til Yoshinoya, men hvis det er 20 kroners rabatt, stormer dere inn hit? Det er forbanna 20 kroner! 20 kroner! Og dere tar med barn også. Se på det, en familie på fire drar til Yoshinoya. Gratu-faen-lerer. Og nå sier ungene, "Flott, Pappa skal bestille en ekstra stor!" Faen, jeg kan ikke se mer av dette.
Yoshinoya burde være fælt sted. To men som sitter mot hverandre ved et U-formet bord, og du vet liksom aldri om de plutselig angriper deg der og da. Det er knivstikk-eller-bli-stukket, og det er det som er så flott med det stedet. Kvinner og barn burde faen holde seg vekke.
Vel, jeg fant endelig et sete, men han ved siden av meg er, "Jeg tar en ekstra stor skål med extra kjøttsaft!". Så nå er jeg forbanna igjen. Hvem i helvete bestiller ekstra kjøttsaft disse dagene? Hvorfor ser du så jævla stolt ut når du sier det? Jeg skulle til å spørr deg, skal du virkelig spise all den kjøttsaften? Jeg ville pokker meg forhøre deg! For omtrent en helt time. Vet du hva? Jeg tror jeg fikk lyst til å si "ekstra kjøttsaft".
Nå, lær av en med erfaring ved Yoshinoya. Det siste store hos Yoshinoya er dette: Extra grønn løk. Det er det som det går i. En ekstra stor skål med ekstra løk, og egg. Det er det som vet hva de holder på med bestiller. De setter i mer løk, og mindre kjøtt. En stor skål med rått egg, det er faen meg helt fantastisk. Nå burde du vite, hvis du fortstetter med å ordre det, er det en sjans for at de ansatte vil skrive deg ned. Det er et dobbelkantet sverd. Jeg kan egentlig ikke anbefale dette til amatører.
Og du, >>1, vel, du burde virkelig holde deg til dagens rett.

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