I came home to my girlfriend standing amidst a pool of blood. Mangled bodies littered the floor, blood still streaming from their freshly opened wounds. Her arms were outstretched, and she held in her hands a beautifully decorated cake.

"I killed your mother, father, and friends, just so that I could be with you all by myself. This cake is to celebrate our birthday."

My eyes began to tear. I felt my chest burn. I couldn't believe I was about to ask this girl to marry me.