>>0 gets an honorary mention in nearly all ITT threads relating to the previous poster, despite never making a single contribution of his own.
>>1 is so adept at construing captcha meanings to create sensical sentences that he is all but unable to speak without first spotting a misspelled or foreign word.
Holy shit.
I didn't see >>2 at first, but I find it odd that we both chose to talk about captchas.
Please excuse my post.
>>4 clearly has been reading my mind and I don't feel too comfortable about that. Good thing his power only extends to DQN, though, because it would be very embarrassing if he knew what I was saying on /love/.
>>7 is able to stomach any liquid in the world without the bad side-effects. Not much can be said about anything else though.
>>8 is able to post good powers but not bad powers. not sure if that's useless though
>>10 will always be able to finish whatever is on his plate at any meal.
>>12 can compel anyone to tell truthfully what they had for breakfast that day.
>>12 can't make up his mind whether to eat at The Rei's or Marty's.
>>14 has the superhuman will necessary to ignore the thread's title and post whatever the hell he wants.
>>17 has the uncanny ability to make me not want to continue a parroting combo.
>>18 can communicate with plants. It turns out plants don't have much to say.
>>19 Can make any NES work in one try without blowing on the cartridge.
>>28 always knows exactly what the person he's looking at had for lunch the previous Saturday.
>>31 can bend spoons with his mind - when he instructs his hands, via his mind, to bend spoons.
>>32 Can cause an Xbox 360 to get an RRoD faster than anyone else.
>>34's superpower, no matter what it is, is bound to come in handy in helping defeat the bad guy at the climax of the thread.
>>３８ ｈａｓ ｔｈｅ ａｂｉｌｉｔｙ ｔｏ ｍａｋｅ ｔｗｏ ｓｌｉｇｈｔｌｙ ｈｕｍｏｒｏｕｓ ｂｕｔｔ ｊｏｋｅｓ ｉｎ ｏｎｅ ｄａｙ．
>>42 can teleport himself up to one millimeter away from his present location.
>>43 can travel forward in time without even thinking about it
>>47 can skim pebbles at an angle of 10° to the surface of a body of water, rather than the measly 7° permitted by physics.
>>48 can read 4-ch with his mind, but still has to use a computer to post until the mobile posting function is finally implemented.
>>51 can pick out nose hairs using only his fingernails. And not even flinch.
>>52 has the ability to stay in decent shape with moderate exercise and a healthy diet.
>>54 can make a Mario Paint version of any song within 10 minutes.
>>55 can burn out any light bulb he concentrates on within three days, but only if he eats the same food every day.
>>56 can tell the exact number of hairs on a person's body after watching them for 47 minutes, as long as he never makes eye contact.
>>56 has the ability to travel through time, but only forwards and at regular speed.
>>58 can assign another superpower to a poster already gifted with one.
If brought to exactly the right altitude and able to remain there, >>59 can fly under his own power. A foot too high or too low, and soft landings become impossible.
>>60 can talk at a maximum speed of two-hundred times faster than normal.
>>64 is able to string symbols and shapes, such as these, into advanced concepts known as "words."
>>65 knows all words in all languages, but is incapable of speaking or writing most of them.
>>69 can force a new meme without any of the participants in the thread ever realising.
>>72 Can duplicate himself an unlimited number of times, so long as he destroys the previous copy immediately at the creation of the new one.
>>73 can transform any coin minted after 1965 into a newer, more recent version of the same coin.
>>74 can identify a horse's pedigree by the taste of its excrement.
>>75 can make any sentence wax scatological, as long as he's the one writing it down.
>>77 can count how many pushups someone has done without looking
>>80 can muster up the energy to care about threads after a sage post.
>>82 can instantly memorize any book, but only if it's on the Korean War.
>>84 can turn a TV on with his mind, but still has to use a remote to change channels.
>>85 can change the distance between the Earth and the sun by up to 5 cm after a savoury meal.
>>86 can predict the lifespan of the nearest seagull by gouging out one of his eyes.
>>90 Can fart without laughing about it, causing someone else to get blamed for farting.
>>92 can stick anyone's face in dough and make gorilla cookies, even if the person isn't ugly.
>>95 able to imitate the air pressure from a compressed can of air
>>94 able to fart very loudly, especially when in the presents of girls he likes.
>>96 can fit himself into tiny boxes which he somehow proceeds to gift-wrap, then gives himself away as presents to the girls he likes.