I got to thinking about how clean my asshole is and was wondering how everyone else cleans their ass.
Personally, I don't like the feeling of dry toilet paper scraping my ass so I've been using baby wipes for the majority of my life. Now whenever I use regular toilet paper I don't feel clean so I always try to carry around a small packet of baby wipes wherever I go.
That's why Japan is superior.
If God wanted my sphincter to be clean, he'd make it so feces would teleport itself into the toilet bowl.
It's wrong to put your fingers so close to such an unclean place on your body.
Toilet paper is a sin.
I let my dog lick it clean.
I've always stood up to wipe my ass. I understand many people wipe their ass from a crouched/sitting position on the bowl, but that just seems odd and rather uncomfortable, and wouldn't you be dipping your hand into the bowl?
>>2
Yeah, by having almost a complete lack of toilet paper anywhere you go, it forces people to use what's best suited for themselves, which is clearly a better option than forcing the same scratchy paper on everyone.
And >>6, how high is the water in your toilet? Normally it's only in the bottom part which goes into the bend.
I donno, it just always seemed unnatural to do it from a sitting position.
Men seem to stand up to wipe more, while women usually stay seated.
When you're sitting your asscheeks naturally spread, making it easier to access residual dried up shit and remove it.
Or of course you could be like me and not wipe, just letting the water clean it out in a shower once a day or so provided you don't take a gigantic dump or have diarrhea.
You are stinking like a pile of shit... oh wait, you ARE a pile of shit.
The washlet was supposed to be the solution to this dilemma. What happened? Why does only Japan get the goodness?
I like douching my ass and putting lubed foreign objects in it.
I like to put cactuses in my ass.
Probably, but it can't be all that much unless you leave it on for fun.
paper for big bits then bidet or failing that shower or sink
get some funny looks in English public toilets
I also use baby wipes, but I'm fine when I can't get them. If I have to use toilet paper, I'm a folder, not a scruncher.
Speaking of folding/scrunching:
http://www.scruncherorfolder.com/
What the hell is a scruncher? You just grab a bunch of paper and shove it down there hoping its not so scrunched up that you get shit on your hand?
I used to scrunch, before I realized the wastefulness and inefficiency of the method. I will live and die a folder.
I clean my ass with a cactus.
I let my boyfriend lick it clean.
I use the most expensive asswipes money can buy because I'm filthy rich. My asswiping experience can't compare to the experience of the common folks.
You pay your brother to lick your ass?
>>6
Yeah, I always stand up a bit too.
My parents were muslim, so I grew up using... usually dish washing liqiud bottles filled with water to squirt on my butt. :p
After that I would use tissue to dry/wipe and make sure it's clean enough.
>usually dish washing liqiud bottles filled with water to squirt on my butt. :p
Out of necessity or preference?
Just a normal "nigger," actually. My parents converted when they were young. I'm agnostic, myself.
>>32
Not quite sure what your question is referring to.
Do we use dish washing liquid bottles out of necessity or preference? I would say preference, since you can put force into the water. Most of the mosques I've been to usually use plant watering cans, which IMO is less efficient, but more... "presentable."
Do muslims rinse their butts with water out of necessity or preference? Well, being clean is part of being muslim, so I suppose it's a necessity to rinse using something or another, if you can.
Here's a link to a youtube clip someone made on the topic. Though I guess it's funnier if you actually know what he's talking about: http://ummahfilms.blogspot.com/2007/05/pursuit-of-cleanliness-season-2-ummah_12.html
I just use a cheese grater.
I built a big mechanical tongue covered with a really soft towel that's soaked in hot soapy water for every use.
It's kinda fun once you get used to it.