I have a girlfriend, we been dating for almost a year and half now, but recently I'm leaning toward of trying to break up with her because we almost argue every single day about nothing. I don't also see myself trying to spend the rest of my life with her, and my parents also disagree about her as well. But the thing is I actually do love her and I actually do care about her, but there are a lot of times where I wanted to break up with her but I just couldn't. Should I continue dating her to see if I decide I will truly want to spend the rest of my life or should I just break up with her now and stop hurting her. (BTW she is abroad now so if I want to break up with her, I have to do it to her through the phone, is that good?) THANK YOU GUYS
I'm new at the whole posting thing. Yeah. So I really need you guys' help! A.A I've heard you all give really great advice and I would love to hear some of it! And BTW I'm a girl.
My love life is literally hopeless. I know I'm young and yadda yadda. But a little romance shouldn't be THIS hard to get. D:
Okay so I've had straight out horrible boyfriends for forever.
My first boyfriend, when we broke up, claimed he had sex with me and I was going to have his kids. LIES! PFFF, I was WAY to young at that time ANYWAYS! DX
A few nasty boyfriends later and I really hit the wall hard. I fall in love with this guy in my English class. A year later he asks me out. I fell in love with him because he was nice to me and funny. Every girls dream, a nice guy. Until I found out that he smoked Mary Jane. But I tried to stay with him. He didn't defend our relationship and ended up breaking up with me for someone three years older than him.
Needless to say, I was devastated. I cried and cried. For days.
And it was Wednesday night that he had broken up with me. That means I had to deal with seeing him and his friends for two more days before I got rest. I ran into bathrooms to cry all day. I don't let people see my tears, because I'm the girl who always looks happy, act's happy, defends her friends, keeps everyone happy; direly hoping for happiness in return because she's hurting. Because she puts other's happiness first. That's me. I'm really shy though, when it comes to relationships only. I'm kinda a person with a big personality. I don't much care for what people think about me, unless I like them. And I dress like I want to, not what's in fashion.
Well, I'm almost 14. I turn 14 in 26 days. I'm going into 9th grade. Yes, I know a lot of you are going to say things like I'm too young to worry about such things and blah blah blah.
I just want a little romance in my life. What girl doesn't?
The boyfriend who claimed I was pregnant with his kid, did so in 6th grade. Jerk!
Anyways, to answer you last question, it's like I can see what everyone else has, but for some reason I can't obtain it.
>>So here's my dilima. I have no idea how to move on. It's obvious that they're out of reach, but I don't know how to get over it.
Well, you find someone else.
How? Beats me. If you ever find out, let me know.
Well, maybe I'll have luck in High School. But my current problem, of to which I was informed, this moring, is that guy # 1 likes me back too, just not enough.
Wow. This is seriously starting to bother me.
Maybe you're focusing too much on this love thing right now.
It's not bad that you're trying to find some romance right now, but don't let guys completely rule your life :D. I say this as a fellow female.
Just this year, I felt the same way when all my friends started hooking up with my other friends and I was the only single left. It wasn't until a couple months ago that they all started breaking up, and it wasn't until three weeks ago that the guy I loved for two years asked me out.
Just relax, calm down, and take your mind off guys for a month and spend your time doing something productive. As someone said before, love comes when you least expect to find it :).
I suppose your right OTL but... I dunno, I guess it's just hard. I mean, I have to get good grades for my mom, be perfect for my teachers, console my friends. I have nothing for myself.
I guess I'll take your advice for now. I have to save up for a cosplay me and my friends are doing.
^^ Anime conventions are ammmaaazzzing! I have until next march to save up quite a number though. >.<
Thank you guys for everything! <3
I guess I'll still be here though V.V
That's okay n.n
But really, does anyone hear from Densha, or at least Hermes?
?
>He doesn't know I like him. Or that I'm a girl, for that matter.
I'm curious about how that can be?
8,
He acts like I'm just another one of the boys. Just another friend.
TT.TT
Love relationships are uncertain endeavors, so you always need to be willing to risk. Nevertheless, I think you would have less problems if you got to know better the person you are interested in before you start a relationship with him. It's helpful to know what are his interests, character, his views on things, how he reacts when he's irritated or angry, etc. And for this, you need to spend quite some time with him, which means that you don't start the relationship straight away, and that you must have enough common interests to do activities together even though you're not in a relationship.
You don't have to know a guy for 5 years before going out with him, you could even go out from the first day on, but you must be aware that you need time to know a person, either before or during the relationship. But when you are in a relationship, you can't really look at other people, whereas if you are single, you can spend time with different people that may turn out to be interesting to you. Committing to someone you're not too enthusiastic about just to avoid being alone might be a bad choice, since you may miss a much more interesting person otherwise. Sometimes you need quite a while to understand that a certain person is not right for you. That's unpleasant but not a waste, since in the future you'll know that this type of person is not the one for you, and go for a better match.
To summarize: your relationships will improve when you'll learn to understand what qualities and flaws of a person work for you, and recognize those traits among the people you're interested in.
10, that was amazing. Thank you! <3
But I guess your right. It's back to the Love Drawing board for me T.T Ratz...
Me and my boy friend have been going out for a few months. Both of us are unemployed. He keeps getting on me how I don't put as much effort into getting a job as he is. Today we were talking on the phone and he said "I don't know how long I can keep dealing with you." I hung up telling him I would talk to him later, and cried for a half hour. I called him later and he didn't answer the phone.
I just wanted to enplane to him that what he had said hurt a lot. Now I'm thinking he may break up with me soon. Just the thought of this is ripping my heart in two. Help? Did I do the wrong thing?
There's obviously more to this than just this single issue of employment. Though it may be the biggest, money usually is. Sounds like your relationship has stagnated and he is itching for change. I think the wrong thing here is that he may want someone who is motivated and moving and you can't offer that. Or maybe he could just want someone who isn't you.
In truth, have you actually been doing a sincere effort to get a job? This is an anonymous place, so just answer what seems closer to the truth to you.
Basically this is just to find, how do people and who are the people that find "love" and what do they do in their lives that make this happen, and story of how it happen basically. (Copy&Paste and remove the ones that does not fit you or fill in the blanks).
Sex: Male/Female
Age: <16/16-18/19-21/22-25/26-30/31-35/36-40/41+
Ethic: (Name it)
Nationality: (Name it)
Study: Yes/No
Work: Yes/ No
Training: Yes/No
Knows How to Drive and Owns a Car: Yes/No
Live: Alone/With Parents/With Someone
On Computer: 1-2/3-5/6-8/9-10/10+ Hours a Day
Body: Athletic/Skinny/Fat
> other note, I actaully dont jump into conclusions without thinking
I don't know you in real life, but as I said, this is judging by your posts in other threads to other posters. Sometimes you take them too seriously, when they were clearly being sarcastic, and you don't really get your facts right first. I know, because I was one of the other posters.
> I actaully want to move on, but every time I try, I get Nightmares and wont go away..
I can't pretend to understand what you go through, because the stuff I went through hasn't traumatized me to that degree. But I truly believe that it was because I didn't give it a chance to swallow me up. You have to stop feeling sorry for yourself, and think a certain way so that you're at ease with your past. For me, I thought "Shit happens. I can't change the past, and I'm sure there are a lot more people out there worse off than me. I'd just get left behind if I kept thinking about the past." And so I packed all my bad experiences away into a box, and pressed on forward.
> Roughly from this so far, people find it (love) online using networking sites, through friends and work
Startling revelation, lol.
Sex: Female
Age: <16
Ethic: Korean
Nationality: Korean American
Study: Yes
Work: No
Training: No
Knows How to Drive and Owns a Car: No
Live: With Parents
On Computer: 3-5
Body: Skinny
Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual
Go to the Pub: Never
Go Out to Town: Once a Month
Shopping: Whenever I feel like it
Sex: Male
Age: 19
Ethic: Caucasian
Nationality: American
Study: Yes
Work: Part-time
Training: No
Knows How to Drive and Owns a Car: Yes
Live: Alone
On Computer: 6-8 Hours a Day
Body: Healthy but not athletic, skinny, nor fat
Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual
Go to the Pub: Never
Go Out to Town: Once a Month
Shopping: Once a Month or less
Sex: F
Age: 19-21
Ethic: Chinese
Nationality: Canadian
Study: Yes
Work: Yes
Training: No
Knows How to Drive and Owns a Car: No
Live: Alone, with parents in the summer
On Computer: 6-8
Body: Skinnyfat
Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual
Go to the Pub: Once a Month
Go Out to Town: 1-3 a Week
Shopping: Once a Month
Sex: Female
Age: 22-25
Ethic: Caucasian
Nationality: Estonian
Study: No
Work: Yes
Training: Yes
Knows How to Drive and Owns a Car: Yes, red zaz968M (the soviet car)
Live: With Parents (too poor to afford apartment)
On Computer: 10+ Hours a Day (working with computors)
Body: Athletic
Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual
Go to the Pub: once every few months
Go Out to Town: rarely
Shopping: 1-3 a Week
Sex: Male
Age: 31-35
Ethnicity: Caucasian (mediterranean)
Nationality: Portuguese
Work: Yes
Knows How to Drive and Owns a Car: Yes
Live: Alone, despite being married
On Computer: 6-8 Hours a Day
Body: Skinny
Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual
Go to the Pub: Once a Week
Go Out to Town: 1-2 a Week
Shopping: once a week
Virgin: No
Smoke: No
Sex: Female
Age: 21/22-25
Ethicity: Caucasian
Nationality: American
Study: Yes
Work: Yes
Know How to Drive and Own a Car: Yes
Live: With Parents (when home - college student)
On Computer: 3-5 Hours a Day
Body: Fat (chubby?)
Sexual Orientation: Bisexual
Go to the Pub: Never
Go Out to Town: 1-3 a Week
Shopping: Once a Month
Virgin: No
Sex: Male
Age: 22-25
Ethic: European
Nationality: French
Study: Finished
Work: Searching for a job
Training: No
Knows How to Drive and Owns a Car: Knows how, doesn't own
Live: With parents (until I find a job)
On Computer: 10+ Hours a Day (work on it, a lot of hobbies on it)
Body: Skinny
Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual
Go to the Pub: 1-3 a Week (when not at parent's)
Go Out to Town: Once a Month
Shopping: Once a Month
Sex: Male
Age: 19-21
Ethic: Caucasian
Nationality: Finnish
Study: No
Work: Yes (part-time)
Training: No
Knows How to Drive and Owns a Car: Yes/No
Live: Due to unfortunate events, with my fagass bro, hope to soon get rid of him and get my life back on rail
On Computer: 9-10 Hours a Day (I blame my bad work situation)
Body: Fat (chubby, really)
Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual
Go to the Pub: Some times, not often
Go Out to Town: 1-3 a Week
Shopping: 1-3 a Month
I might be the only one who remembers otakun's story but I don't care. I'm determined to find out what happened.
Please tell us what happened with tomogo or tamago or what's her name. That girl you really liked!
Hope I'm not being rude.
I too am curious.
Hi guys, been a while since I posted anything about myself huh? Well get ready for a wall of text!
After Valentines Day I got back into the groove of my school life, doing homework and studying blah blah, all that good stuff. One thing though is that I got back into photography for a bit to rediscover myself. Don't get me wrong, I love photography, but its very time consuming and money draining. Almost all my freetime was taken up by doing project after project so I was starting to lose track of time. Before I knew it White Day was coming around the corner and I wanted to spend the day with Tamago. I bought a small present for her and called her to go out. Unfortunately she didn't get back to me in time to do it. From there I would try to find time for us to finally meet up, but photography kept getting in the way. I had to spend almost every weekend in the dark room or shooting, which I just realized it now while writing this I could have ask her to come with me on a shoot. Stupid me >_<
Eventually time takes its passage and before I knew it summer vacation rolled around. I'm happy to report other than my relationships are really improving! I'm a lot happier and more motivated from all this. I was expecting more time to come from summer vacation, but until now I've been busy with so many things that I could barely take a break. By now, it might be too late, but I really want to reconnect with Tamago. Its not like our relationship fell apart, but it was put on hold. So to say, maybe the rest of summer should be the "Summer of Love?"
good luck dear otakun :3
Summer of Love, huh?
Well, good luck Otakun. Cheers for the relationship you are having with Tamago.
Yay! Good luck!
Please update us if anything happens!
I'm glad you're doing well, and are motivated! Good luck with your "summer of love" :3
Good luck! Keep posted please.
Good luck Otakun. Greets from Brasil
I had intended to call Tamago this coming monday, but some unfortunate circumstances just occured.
While I was teaching I missed a phone call from you know who and it wasn't until later when I was taking a break from working out that I noticed I had a new voicemail. Going through my first few messages being from my mom telling me to call her back I finally got to the last one. It was Tamago... it turns out that she was calling me from the airport saying that she's going on vacation for the rest of the summer and how busy she has been lately. It seems like life got in our ways and kept us from spending more time with each other before she left. And when she does come back she'll be going to another college. Her message was filled with an odd sadness to it and was on my mind at for the rest of the night.
So right now I feel really conflicted... I'm going on vacation myself in a month and pretty much everybody expects me to find a girl and fall in love there. Especially because I got really close to someone there last time I went, but it didn't work out simply because of my shyness. Any advice?
>>10
Seems to me that if you don't make a move now then it will be too late and she will be gone.
Do you love her?
Or is it just a passing fancy?
You'll have to work up the courage to confess to her!
That, or she will be gone from your reach to fall into the clutches of an evil adversary. Don't let it happen!
Hey romance,
I'm quite curious if some of you ever had a "friends with benefits" or a sex only relatiponship, or something in between.
How did it come to be like that and how did you feel?
There's someone I feel attracted to and like. Since he's not interested in a real relationship he hinted at what he wanted. But I dunno, guys, really. Honestly, I'm a virgin and kinda frightened of this kind of suggestion.
Male here: never had a relationship purely for sex. I don't say I'm part of the majority, it just happens to be my case. People do have fuck buddies, and I don't see anything wrong with that. But for me, it's out of the question.
>There's someone I feel attracted to and like. Since he's not interested in a real relationship he hinted at what he wanted.
Seems to me that this is going to be painful to you. After having sex with him, you are certain to be even more attracted to him, whereas the opposite is more uncertain. If both of you were only interested in sex, it would be a different matter, even though often problems do arise, if sex becomes regular.
Well, the only thing you'll get from him will be sex. So, it will very ackward for you, and shallow... So, no. Refrain from it.
I've had that kind of relationships with college partners. It's good if you are actually only looking for sex. Otherwise it just sucks.
Honestly, i'm not sure of how I got there. I was kind of handsome when i was in my twenties, so i was akways the one asked for it.
I've had a couple of those type of relationships. Don't get too attached or you'll end up hurt.
op already seems to be hurt a bit..
dont do it just for sex speshully as being virgin and all..
I wouldn't do it.
If you're nervous at all about it, in my opinion it's not at all worth losing your virginity over.
If he doesn't want a relationship I think you should move on and find someone who does since that seems to be what you're after.
If you're a virgin, DON'T DO IT.
Once you've had a substantial relationship and lost it to someone you love, knock yourself out. I've had way more fuckbuddies than actual girlfriends/boyfriends, and being a young and free 22 year-old guy, I'm quite fine with that.
...Except on some nights... sometimes it does hurt to pull up your pants, kiss your friend goodbye, walk out of her house... and despite it all still feel painfully alone. =( Don't lose you're virginity in that kinda situation, it'll hurt worse.
I might be presented to two delightful new girls this weekend, which is something I kinda badly need these times after my previous critical failure.
Sadly, they're both exes of friends of mine, so... you all know what that means. Off-limits. Meh.
>>36
stop being so insecure and just go for it! >:D
If the girl shows CLEAR signs of liking him as a guy rather than just a friend, it might be best to stay as friends, for the sake of your friendship.
But if the girl is kinda giving you two the same signs mostly, I think you should go for it before you regret it. :)
>>42
You've got to find the middle ground in the pursuit and the idleness of relationships. Put yourself out there with some intent, but at the same time not. Increase your confidence, but don't be arrogant. Everything in life is about balance and you've got to find your own!
That being said I've probably been on the idle side for a long time now, but the memories of the pursuit days are heart wrenching. Doesn't mean I won't give up! I guess my problem really begins in the starting
so ronery.. :(
The sad or hilarious (depending on your viewpoint) thing is that this place is a singles' lounge full of ahem.. singles giving love/romance/relationship tips to other singles... I am really not being an @$$ as I am single myself, but that is the reality... I have come to an understanding that tricks don't really work when it comes to meeting that special someone. Maybe there are no tricks in the first place. Liking is but a sum of complex factors (appearance, personality, popularity, etc.) For whatever reason, people do like to see changes on you. New hairstyle, new clothes, whatever.. one just needs to change something (not too drastic though, no plastic surgery :)) and you will be noticed. I guess a change sends a subliminal message to one's possible counterparts that one is in for a mating season (in a romantic kinda way -- really). So, if one is a guy (like me), he needs to have some money (for clothes, a hairstylist/not barberer, etc.), decent car (girls love it -- end of story), moderate confidence and no extra weight. Again I am not trying to be mean here, I myself am overweight (or fat, whatever). That is if you want a decent looking girl.
Even as I am reading what I wrote, it sounds a bit cynical, stereotypical and whatnot, but it is really a glance at reality. Whoever believes in what female celebrities talk all over media (we want nice guys) is the ultimate blah-blah. Girls like "almost-jerk" types (well most of them do) and that can't be really helped. Yeah, I know what you're all saying now -- people with self-respect and good character do not need to change. You are likely right, but tell that to hordes of girls who drool over six-pack equipped jerks. That goes for men too, we do love slutty girls.
We are coming back to change part again. I am basically trying to get rid of my fat@$$ by virtually sleeping on the gym/treadmill. And that's just tip of the iceberg. Six packs on the faraway horizon is just a small bullet on the list of stuff that I need to change to fit that likeable and dateable guy type. Since I was obviously absent the day God was giving beauty away, I will probably have to go to a cosmetic surgery to "enhance" my facial features and make them more in line with the greatest common (subjective) denominator when it gomes to a dateable guy type (universally accepted by girls) today. And this is what I have to do. I wouldn't really recommend that to anybody. But the reason I am saying this is that people tend to fake when they talk about these things. If a guy asks a girl (who says she's looking for a nice guy and she's not all about looks and blah blah) to date him, she's going to invent a million of excuses and reject him just because she's also waiting for that one jerk in shining armor on the white horse blah blah blah.
Look at it this way:
Losing weight = health + self esteem [win already] = girls [bonus]
I got rejected by the same girl for the 3rd time.
Why the 3rd time? It can't be helped. The feeling just goes back again and again
You see, we're very close, she sees me as a big brother, I treat her as my little sister. I help her in her everyday life like school work, friend problems, etc.
Although, when she rejected me last night, she told me "I'm a better imouto (little sister) than a love interest"
Also, she says that she lost the basis of falling in love with someone, and she's happy with the things she have in the present.
There is closure. I just wanted to post this because I just want to let this out in my system. I have been crying at random times already.
>>48
that is a bullshit... or maybe not but just in case, don't believe her... because she can eventually find someone and it will hurt you... also, I would recommend moving on... being rejected one time is enough, three times is better than enough... from my point of view, any romantic feelings for her will lead only to pain on your or both sides...
>>46
don't know about everyone else, but I ask here sometimes for advice just to know other people's points of view... I can solve problems pretty well myself (or so I think) but sometimes is good to know other opinions
and about that changing... got a new haircut today:)... I'm pretty lost in what girls like about men so don't know if it will be effective but I personally like it
Plastic surgery isn't always a fantastic way to go.
I went under the knife to try to improve my appearance and make myself more attractive to women.
Got rid of the stuff I didn't want, all right, but it also left me with numerous disfiguring scars. The cure is almost worse than the disease ever was.
It's been eight years since the surgeries, and I still have never had a girlfriend or even been on a date.
>>46 To undergo plastic surgery to please others is stupid. The only valid reasons to undergo plastic surgery is to address some disfigurement condition, or to please yourself.
As for others, it's much easier to find someone who likes you the way you are, than to knife yourself into an abstract ideal which won't be perfect to no one. There are plenty of people on this world, with all kinds of tastes, don't lose your sweat trying to please everyone, find people who like you as you are.
And BTW, there are plenty of people here who are not single. However, it's true that I for myself tend to ignore the single's thread.
I can talk to anybody I'm not shy. I talk to strangers all the time. I talk to women too. I just can't seem to flirt with them.
It's like there is this invisible boundary that I can't cross.
I get nervous and feel like I'm getting too close or invading their boundaries. I feel like I'm doing something wrong.
What can I do to flirt better, and not be worried about it?
yeah that's what i try to do...but somehow after the initial 'spark' things just stagnate.
for example i get to know someone who's into books and travelling, like i am...we get a good vibe going talking about books we like, places we've been to...but somehow i get a sense that the conversation's not GOING anywhere.
i don't know how to put this into words, but i get this 'stalling' feeling...like we're just talking about the stuff and once the 'topic' has run it's course it's back to square one.
YO LEGS MUST BE TIRED AS HELL COS U BEEN RUNNIN IN MY HEAD ALL DAY YO!
Well, honsestly, you have to try being nice, compliments never hurt, not to many at least, and once you think one topic is too drawn out, or she does, try to change topics.
Let's say you meet a girl in a sports store. Obviously she's single by the ways she's shopping around the girls stuff, or yadda yadda. Then you talk about whatever sport thing is in her hand. Say, a pink basket ball. Ask her if she likes basket ball, and just start talking. Then, to other sports. Then to other things. Just try to bring other things up. Girls don't expect boys to know everything immediately!!!
As a fellow girl, I know some topics can be a bit annoying after a while, a change is always good.
<3 Hope it helped!! ^,^
Go get `em tiger!!! =^,^=
what is flirting, actually?
i've never really understood what it actually means to flirt...
can anyone give me some 'examples' of what could be classified as flirting?
Flirting is being friendly, with some slight sexual hints. The sexual hints can be simple compliments, body language, or even some touching.
To be honest though, it is one of those things you can't define. Apparently I am a huge flirt, and I didn't realize it until recently. I always thought I was being friendly, but I there is a thin blurry line between friendly and flirty.
Hahhaha, seem i'm a flirty guy as well. Mny of my females friends have tried to seduce me out of the blue, and it turned that they said i was the one flirting first. Sucks a little.
just be yourself.
winking and smiling.. while standing more close than in normal conversation. trying to reach or slightly touch other body during it feels good man :P
>i get this 'stalling' feeling...like we're just talking about the stuff and once the 'topic' has run it's course it's back to square one.
A topic of common interest is a nice opening, because it gives you time to find useful information about the other person. But it can only do so much. You have to use that window of opportunity to advance the relationship, and not simply stagnate and exhaust the topic. The common interest will be regularly useful in a relationship, but of course it can't be the only resource you use to further your relationship.
So next time, while you are using a common interest to have a opening conversation, get to know important information like what does your person of interest does during leisure time, favorite music, films, etc, what are her other centers of interest, what is the structure of her family, and circle of friends, etc. All this will be useful to create yourself new chances of doing things with her. It's impossible to run out of conversation topics with someone you just met.
Hay romance. I have come to you because I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m pretty much an average 21 year old guy. I have pretty average looks. I’m a bit of an introvert, I like to stay at home on the computer, but I still have a small group of friends who I hang out with once a week. I don’t have any real talents. I’m ok at a lot of things and have been over seas a bit in my life. Most of the things I find interesting are nerdy, everyday things just seem boring. I really hate to say this because of the connotations it seems to have developed, but I’m really just a nice guy. By “nice guy” I don’t mean one of those people who sit around bemoaning the fact that a girlfriend doesn’t fall into their lap, and who think that their single status is the byproduct of lying girls who say they want nice guys but then only go for jerks. I’m just a normal guy who was raised to be polite to women, hold doors and speak politely, like that. I also realize that a big part of me being single has to do with my own introverted nature.
However my problems do not come from some nice guy syndrome. I have actually been working and succeeding on improving myself. I have started to care more about my appearance and am even trying to expand my social life and be more comfortable with girls. My problem is that I don’t know where or how to meet girls. All of the girls I run into in college seem to be taken already. And I have no idea where to go to meet girls outside of school. I live in the suburbs so its not like there are a lot of places to go around here either.
I’m really starting to get desperate. I’ve been telling myself “this will be the year it all terns around” for the past six years. All of my friends are either in relationships or are happily single and not interested in looking for anyone. I’m just tired of being alone I want someone to smile with and have fun with. Please help me romance.
I agree with >>2.
And what about clubs at your school, if you guys have them? College is a big place, you're bound to find someone you can bond with. And plus, if you get involved in a club, you can find someone with the same interest as you! :)
Aza aza fighting! Don't give up and stay positive - you can do it! :D
This all sounds like good advice. Unfortunately my main group of friends is not to into partying. I did manage to get invited to one party this summer. Unfortunately there were only a very small number of girls all of whom were already with someone, although they weren’t really my type anyway. I’m going through a strange time in college right now but when I settle down the club suggestion sounds rather good.
I was wondering of anyplace that might be good to try over the break. The only places I can think of are book stores and malls. I would like to be able to meet girls that are intelligent and I don’t really know what kind of places attracts them best.
>>4
Simple. Make new friends that do party or the like.
Try social networking websites like Facebook or Myspace for both friends and potential girlfriends.
Expand your interests and hobbies to meet new types of girls.
Also, don't try to find "intelligent" girls. They don't exist. Haha, not really, but try not to be picky.
Sometimes your fated one may not be "intelligent," but rather just "average."
Never set ridiculous standards or unrealistic standards. Try to keep them as low as you can without dating whores.
random parks might have some single girls reading books on the grass/benches.. :P
>>6
Guy approaching me in the park = stalker.
Hey I am single myself, so my advice probably won't count. But since you said that you like intelligent girls, you may try to get into art and visit avant-garde galleries/exhibitions. Such places attract intelligent girls, but don't go clueless. Do your homework since you sound pretty internet-literate :)
Hope you'll find what you're looking for. Good luck!
>>7 I have to say I agree. That is part of why I have never approached girls that I don’t know beforehand, I would kind of feel like a stalker. Of course when I try girls that I do now I get Friendzoned without a second thought, the look on their face says the never even considered me as datable.
>>8 This shouldn’t be too hard. I’m switching to an art major so I could actually use my school lessons for something. Surprisingly I never even thought of this, I’ll have to give it a try.
I'm an intelligent girl and so are my friends. I'm not speaking for myself, but intelligent girls like me. We do the same things you do; stay home, play on the computer, do research on interesting topics for fun, likes nerdy offbeat things...we don't really go to parties, we are pretty straight edge..sometime, if not most.
I would say anime conventions or art galleries, the manga section of Barns & Noble, China Town...those are places me and friends go to, but we are very few...its hard for me to find friends since these places I frequent for fun attract older people..or younger, or ppl I don't really clique with. : / ...but you won't really find us at clubs or parties dancing, getting sloshed, and carrying on. After all we are pretty introverted ourselves. I for one am extremely shy and is very hard to find guys that I can clique with, introverted offbeat (nerdy cool but not crazy) guys.
...where do guys like you hang out? :/
>where do guys like you hang out? :/
here, it seems ^_^ But honestly, apart from the internet, I think the only way to meet similar people is to become more active in the center of interest we have (i.e. conventions, manga clubs, etc). Because at he end of the day, and unless you reach them via internet, you can't meet people who refuse to go out of their home and mix with others.
I was down the pub with a friend of mine two weeks ago and he bought his girlfriend, we'll call her Girl X, with him. She had a friend with her, who we'll call Girl Y.
I found Girl Y quite attractive and told my friend this. I found out at work the next day that she told him she was attracted to me but thought I was 'out of her league'. So I know she's definitely interested.
So far I've seen her the last two days, last night we did a few shots in the company of some friends and even played a game of pool.
My question is, we're both pretty shy - how should I continue? I'd like to get into a serious relationship with her but I don't know how to go about it without rushing things.
>4
Balls, I was going to ask her tonight! Now I don't know where to take her. Bar? I think dinner is a bit too extravagent for a 20 year old and a 22 year old's first date.
Frisbee? Biking?
Also, I don't think the general consensus is that dinner is too extravagant for the first date of people your age... or hell, any age! Go somewhere where you can get dinner for the both of you for under $20 or something, if you choose to go that route. It doesn't have to be fancy.
Also, Sunday brunch or coffee or something?
Ask her to go on a picnic with you! Go to the store together, pick some stuff, have fun; then have a nice meal.
It's summer, so it should be a lovely outing, no?
Also maybe go to a small local event: again, in the summer, lots of those usually are going on.
Could be a fun and unique experience!
Progress report!
I managed to ask her out and we're going to see Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (Her choice, not mine!) in the closest city. Any tips for while I'm there with her? I don't want to do the stereotypical 'yawn/hug' thing. =P
Try to hold her hand! The 'yawn/hug' thing is soooo lame. No offense to anyone that does it.
What is the closest city?
It WAS Brighton - but it turns out they're showing the movie in my local cinema, so we're going there instead.
hmm, sorry. Don't know that area.
but at the movies, offer to buy her food; chicks love when you actually WANT them to eat.
Also, do not mention Megan Fox. D;