Long ago I came to these boards looking for help in my love life. For those interested in a 6 year old thread here's the link: http://4-ch.net/love/kareha.pl/1226981241/l50
Even though that chapter of love didn't work out as well as I had hoped, all the lessons I learned those days eventually did help me find the love of my life.
My question is where is all the posts of people that need help or encouragement? Let's help everyone that comes here! :)
Well after having a few letdowns I kinda feel extremely devoid of emotions and I no longer want to find love. I just want to be bad to people like they've been bad to me.
I found out, after deciding on changing my behavior, that soon all my 'friends' cut ties with me. It was that easy: each and every one of them neglected me on the first 'bad' thing I did to them. They didn't bother talking to me about it; they didn't want to know why I did what I did. It did not surprise them at all that all these years I've been 100% there for them and suddenly I changed my behavior. They used me for as long as they had to; as soon as I turned my back on them, they turned their back on me.
I won't have any more shit by anyone, no more. Anyone who is coming my way is going to get their ass handed to them properly.
Unfortunately, this sort of reasoning leaves no place for love. I don't need it in the first place. I hope you read this post. I really want your opinion on this. I know this is Love and Romance and that my post is borderline off-topic, but that's just the sort of post yours provoked.
An ex-boyfriend,lets call him Thomas, and I split up a little over a year and a half ago. At the time I was more devastated than I had ever imagined was possible, however I slowly came to realize it was for the best. My best friend John helped me through it, he was always there to listen, and he never got mad when I called him at weird hours. I'd never considered John anything but a friend, and I felt sure he felt the same way.
I feel as though a little information about the events proceeding the break-up is necessary. Thomas always had a bit of a paranoid streak, nothing that would be considered a serious mental issue, but definitely more than the norm.Over the course of the three months before we broke up, he became decreasingly paranoid, and distant. I can't stress enough how drastically he changed, he went from being one of the most happy go lucky guys I'd ever met, to someone I was at times scared of. Not scared of in the sense that I felt he would do physical harm to me, but in the sense that I felt like I was walking on eggshells when I was around him. I tried on several occasions to get him to open up to me about what was bothering him, but he never would.
This past Valentines day irrevocably changed the way I feel about the events leading up to, and after the breakup. John, and I went to a singles party. For the most part he was his usual drunk self, he was hitting on every guy there. About half-way through the night he started hitting on me. When I questioned him about his actions he said he was just joking, and trying to cheer me up. I felt a little weird out, but he's done similar things to other people so I wrote it off. At some point during the drive home he started crying, so of course I asked him what was wrong. Our conversation went something like this
> he was hitting on every guy there. About half-way through the night he started hitting on me
Your friend John is gay? Best I can understand of this situation is that John is jealous of you because he likes Thomas.
Perhaps the problem is that all of you like Dick.
It's been a while since I've been on these boards, about 6 years now. Here's what I've got to say: Trust your heart. If you want to give Thomas another chance do it, but do it only for your own sake of having no regrets. If you can live without Thomas happily then move on. However, John doesn't sound like he's really that good of a friend. You're better off without him. Good luck
I've been dating my girlfriend for almost 3 years now. Everything about our relationship is great, she's a real catch. Unfortunately, she has a lower sex drive than I do. This is nothing new, since the beginning she's always been more passive and less sexual than me. She really enjoys sex once we get started, and rarely turns me down, but I have to put a lot of work into getting her in the mood. Recently, I'm getting tired of having to always be the one that initiates things. It makes me feel like she doesn't physically desire me. I've been getting sexually frustrated and often masturbate secretly to try to quell my rampant sex drive.
Last night I talked to her about it, but we didn't really come to any fruitful conclusion. She acknowledged that she's not often in the mood for sex. I know I can't force her to want me more, but I don't want to end the relationship just over this. What should I do?
Does she know that you masturbate? You said you do it in secret - maybe if you let her know that you do then she will look at things differently. Perhaps she can help with that even if she is not in the mood for sex herself, I guess it depends though. But it's possible that she would enjoy pleasuring you that way and it would keep both of you satisfied. I don't know how you would suggest that directly though, but you should let her know that you are masturbating if she doesn't already. Gague her reaction and act accordingly.
I think most girls have lower sex drive than their boyfriends. My girlfriend certainly does, though not to the extent that your does. If this is a very serious problem, but you want to continue the relationship, I would recommend some kind of couple's therapy.
Women have lower sex drives than men do. This is normal for humans and what you are describing is also normal.
If women had the same sex drive men did, no one would ever stop fucking and we'd all starve to death.
Sad but true.
So I live in the countryside of Japan. Not many opportunities to meet pretty girls out here, but I have met one. The problem is, outside of hand holding, she has been very non-commital. But whenever I give up on her, she emails me saying she really wants to do something with me.
I'm not sure about the rules in Japan. Does one just go for the gusto, like in the Japanese movies? Somehow I doubt life is like the fiction. I'm a relatively shy guy that got tired of being burned, so my progress is glacial to say the least.
Does one have to admit one has feelings, ala densha otoko? How do I move to the next stage.
Supplementary: she is six years older than me. Maybe she sees that as a problem.
Response to >>1 "I'm a relatively shy guy that got tired of being burned, so my progress is glacial to say the least."
Be shy, you have your reasons; and in your own time-ing you will grow less shy. Until then seek slutter women, play in the sac (to some degree) and build your Confidence.
Regarding that one women in your paragraph ..let her go. If she wants a sexual encounter she'll find it. If she wanted you for a sexual encouner, then she would have used her mind & voice and told you already. Move on. She doesn't appreciate your goodness. (date some sluts, and then..)..find a woman who appreciates your goodness.
oh my jizz! it got necro-ed 5 yrs... let this thread die guyz
OK Japanese women are just like any other women, they all want the same thing, kindness, protection and providence from their man. A girl may already like you and is hoping that you do to, so they wait for you to do want thing, and that's to confess to them, because they're afraid that you might not like them back, so if you really love this girl confess to her and she'll tell you what she wants, unlike the US, Japanese woman are very considerate and will accept your feelings, but they'll tell you that they're not interested if they don't like you. My apologies for this being late, I just found this site.
hm... really? i thought jap babes usually are the more forward types who will confess their feelings for you like those cliched jap high school movies? and give handmade goodies on valentines too?
i also here they are a bit more materialistic? is that true?
【Japan is being in a critical situation】
In spite of this is an important time for Japan to revive, Japanese Government keeps trying to profit China and Korea.
So China has been invading Japan, and Korea has been eating at Japan.
On politically, socially, mentally and many sides or insides of things.
Many Chinese and Korean are living in Japan now.
Why do they only see this situation without a single word for the interests
If this situation is going on, Japan as what Japan is would not last much
Do they really want like that?
If Chinese people who live in Japan don't face the fact of their mother
country, they would lost nowaday's their freedom and wealth.
The Japanese are very reserved with their romance. They tend towards subtle flirting with gestures, body language, and indirect statements much more than western cultures which emphasis bravely pursuing a kiss or embrace. While they MAY find western bluntness some what endearing they will also shy away from it if they feel it is too much too soon or too fast. The Japanese do tend to put a lot of importance on the social bonds they form with others and as such take longer to reach a level of even friendship with others. The most you can do is be yourself but moderate some of your affectionate behavior so you're not "coming on too strong" and just take your time. Eventually when you've known each other for a good amount of time I think a minimum of a 1/2 a year would be ok you should admit how you feel and ask her on a date. There are some culture differences but women like feeling special and that's universal.
Japanese Cute Girls Photo
They DO NOT date otakus and freaks.
you need to do her in the butt
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Oh, I am calling the police.
Okay...a little background: a bunch of my friends and I were having a beach bonfire afterparty following a post-graduation bowling party and some of my friends brought some significant others, friends, or siblings to the events. There was alcohol flowing at both parties and I'm guessing that the people who partook of the alcohol were probably buzzed (I'm not sure if they were drunk). Anyway, the older brother of one of my friends started calling me "pretty lady" and tried to solicit a promise to go bowling again with 'them' one day ('them' I hope meant everybody at the gathering but I'm probably wrong). My question is was he serious or was it the booze talking (and personally, I'm hoping it's the second option)? I don't have a lot of experience hanging out with drinkers so experienced people, please give me some guidance here! Thanks!
Depends on how drunk he was, but it was most likely the booze talking. It probably means he likes you, but probably wouldn't mention it sober.
Thanks for the reply, >>2. Oh, and if this changes things, I forgot to mention that the bowling/bonfire parties was the first time we ever met each other. That's why I'm kind of freaking out because we barely know each other and yet he's hugging me from behind and verbally flirting with me...yeah, it feels awkward to me (newbie at drunkenness or buzzedness).
Yesterday my "friend" come to me with his new (not so new, honestly) girlfriend and I think she was interested in some way in me.
There's not much to tell, long handshaking, some sort of eyes game, but, uh, It was strange sings of attention, I'm not sure in her and her plays.. Although i liked it.
Today my friend says me she says to him she is scared of me and don't want to go to me again (???) but transmitted hello to me...
Our meeting was not an ordinary, I not wishing that made some impression on her because of my, uh, knowledge, interests, and speech culture. Nevertheless, I could be too much insightful.
Not that I'm very much interested in her or anyone, but the whole situation is a little curios, what the fuck she could mean, help me to decipher this, please?
P.S.: Sorry for non-perfect English.
Non native english speaker here
She is calculating your net gross
Even if she did like you, don't even think about it. That's your friend's girlfriend. She is off limits.
Im 20 years old and have never been in a relationship. i've had boys tell me they like me but it was at a bad time (senior year of high school and i was moving to another country for college) or we were too close of friends and it was too weird for me. I've never dated, kissed or even held hands in a romantic kinda way. I've had a lot of friends who are guys so its not because i never talk to boys or anything like that. Is it weird for me to be 20 and never had a relationship?? When did you start dating? When do you think is too old to start?
>>64 yeah, seems likely. I hope my family drops the whole matter because I don't want a woman to have to get stuck with an ice-cold type like me who won't care about her or give her any intimate attention. They probably won't drop it, though, since I'm an only child.
>>65 thanks for the wisdom. How's first year of high school going for you?
better then omegas like you did. got more pussy that year then teh number of frindzones you will ever get. cant compare pussy 2 pussy cuz u will never get ne. lmfao
>>67 yeah, I know the type you're talking about. I'm not one of those pathetic "nice guy" types. Like I said, I'm not interested in pussy as you put it. Really kind of disgusts me, actually. But you're clearly a troll, so hey.
oh i herd that line alot of times before from omegas like u. that was b4 they where turned down buy a hooker. omegas r so bad even hookers dont even want em. teh beta and omega put teh pussy on teh pedestal so much and hookers only screw up due to hyergamy teh beta and omega cant even get pussy even when paid 4. lmfao
>>69 lol okay. I don't even know what you're talking about now. Pussy on a pedestal? I don't even like it. You know what, you sound like an insecure dipshit.
omegas like u put teh pussy on teh pedestal when u treat due to insecurity. weather u like it or not ur placed n a group based on ur genes and that would b omega 4 u do 2 having weak. i am alpha cuz i have teh strongest genes. face it, u have nothing 2 offer girls witch is y u "hate" pussy. now i know y they call u handsome. lmfao
Experience does not include sexual experience. As a mattwr of fact the only experience male losers like yoy have are one night stands and short term relationships because that is all you are interested in. The requirement of a LTR that has lasted longer than a hockey season is there to weed out losers like you or the "omega" type losers.
Well that is you choice, just as long as you don't come whining later on that women won't give you the time of day.
Hate Male Losers - You are a Narcissistic bitch.
Hate Male Losers - You are a Narcissistic bitch.
So I met this guy (I'll call him P.) through a friend (J.) last summer (5 months to be exact). We first met in the beach but we didn't talk because we hardly knew each other (we didn't get properly introduced by our mutual friend). I ended up getting drunk and as I was sobering up, he held my hand. I thought it was a cute way of guiding me so I never thought much to it.
After our first meeting, we ended up partying every other weekend. The first night we clubbed together, we made-out. He had a condo close to where we went clubbing so I stayed there with friends. I slept in his room but nothing happened. We just kissed and cuddled. He kept telling me that I was so much better than his ex-girlfriend (whom he was with for 4 years). I then asked him when he last saw her and he said a week before we met (and that they slept together). I didn't think much of it because initially, I was not that interested in him anyways. So I went with the flow.
Every time we went out, we made out except that one night when he came back from his vacation after two weeks (2 months later). To be honest, I ended up missing him so I created an event for all of our friends and him to come out and have fun. One of his ex from 6 years ago happened to be in the club as well. I introduced myself to her but I didn't know who she was at that time. I don't think he realized but I watched him and her the whole night. At first, they were always together and chatted super close. At that time, I didn't think much of it and continued dancing with my other friends. When I turned around, they started to make out. I just felt this stab in my chest and I stormed out of the club, crying. When I came back, I slapped him in the face when he was dancing with her, went outside to take a deep breath, and then went back in trying to ignore him. He looked at me with this sad expression on his face, but I kept walking away from him to see our other friends. At the end of the night, he left with the girl and took a cab back to his place. Our friends dragged me back to P.'s place when I didn't want to be there knowing the girl is probably there with him. Since I live so far, there was no way for me to get home so I stayed for the night. The next day, I left early and deleted P. off my facebook.
So my birthday came rolling along a week later. He sent me a text message on my birthday, greeting me (I didn't even know he knew when my birthday was because I never told him.. I don't know if he saw it on fb or what). I think I giggled a little bit in class when I saw his message (yes I'm such a kid lol). I didn't know if he was coming to my birthday, and my other group of friends kept asking where P. was because they wanted to meet him. Unfortunately, he ended up coming past 2 because he had a work gala to attend too. When I saw him, I was so happy to see him. I think my face literally lit up. I didn't even go to my hotel that night because I ended up going back to his condo (nothing happened). That night I ended up telling him that I liked him and he said he liked me too.
Last month, I started to have problems with some of our mutual friends and I stopped hanging out with them. Before I left to go to my trip, he asked him to meet him at a pub so I went. When I saw our mutual friends there, I felt uncomfortable and wanted to leave but he convinced me to stay. We ended up leaving together to go back to his place where he became quite pushy for sex. I never had sex before so I told him I wasn't ready and he respected me. During my trip, I greeted him "Merry xmas" and he replied 30 mins later. I wanted him to greet me first for new years but he never did so I didn't bother.
I saw him last Saturday for the first time after I came back from my trip. I attended a work party with a friend, and I asked him if he was free. He told me that he was in another location (about 20-30 mins away from where I was) attending an acquaintance's birthday party. I was going to meet him at that location but he said he was too embarrassed to take me there because the location was just so bad in general. I told him it's okay, and I'll meet him there (I was quite tipsy with the red wine I drank and he knew this) but he kept insisting he will pick me up where I was at, and that he needed exercise anyways. When we met up, we went to a pub where we drank for a bit and I realized how tired he was, and told him we should go home. When we got to his place, I told him that I didn't really know much about him (I never really asked him questions about himself and we never really texted much-- like trying to get to know each other or go on dates).
Paying such as alimony at least
The painful but by the mercy of
I go over there anyway