DO/DO NOT WANT?? (13)

1 Name: Torn : 2006-08-07 03:38 ID:tZNaa7zg

A couple of years ago, I met a girl. She's cute, intelligent and geeky. She began dating some guy. While they were dating, we began talking. We'd talk about random things, often sex. At one point she said that if she'd met me first, she would probably be with me instead of the other guy. The other guy found out she'd taken a liking to me and forbade her from talking to me. (yeah, he's an ass.)

Recently, he cheated on her with a stupid psuedo-goth weaboo whore. They broke up and as she was no longer bound by her promise not to talk to me, she called me up. We met one night and hung out, had a good time. I went to her apartment soon after that. We played some video games, did a lot of talking and generally had a good time.

I go to her apartment again. This time, we get into a tickle fight. It's fairly innocent at first, but then she pins me with her waist. We both take a shot at each other in this position, I wear myself out and she suddenly goes limp on me. We just slowed to a halt and laid there for a while, she was brushing my neck and stuff with her head buried in my shoulder. After a while, I started rubbing her back a bit. I said "I kind of thought you liked me." She was shivering, or I thought she was. I asked her what was wrong and she laughed a bit, saying "Do you really want to know?" OK, she's horny. This was not my original aim. It's important to note here that my only previous relationship was a train wreck based soley on the physical side and me pitying the girl. So I think about it for a while and she says that it's "Up to me" and saying that she's not ready for a relationship. (she was with the asshole almost 3 years.) I decide to help her out, we grind a bit and she eventually guides my hand down her pants. Cuddling ensues. I realize it's raining and seem to recall leaving my sunroof open, so I OH SHI- and get my shoes on to leave. She gets up and follows me to the door (6 feet... lol, studio apartments) and says "We'll probably never do this again, OK?"

I've been out with her one time since that and I had a crappy time because someone I really hate was there the whole time. But she continued to hold my attention and amaze me with her skillz. (she codes in qbasic)

I need to figure out if I should follow my feelings for her/if we're compatible. Here's some helpful data.

I like that she:
is geeky, cute, intelligent, has a good sense of humor, is open about sex (though sex itself is not a high priority here at all), doesn't drink

I don't like:
She may be a bit of a furry. She identifies with cats (has a kind of retarded but funny one that divebombs you). I know she finds therianthropy http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Therianthropy_(subculture) interesting.

She has a lot of friends who drink, though she doesn't do it herself. She also hangs out with a guy who's around 7 years older than her. She doesn't know if she likes him, but she's pretty sure he likes her.

Her dress is a bit risque. I usually prefer a more reserved look.

She's Catholic. I don't dig adults with imaginary friends. Worth noting that the asshole shared my attitude and she didn't mind.

Anything you guys could share to help me would be great... questions are welcome and I'll try to update once in a while. If I'm in any way out of line, tell me to GTFO and I'll leave.

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-07 04:43 ID:D7AdWF9K

The negatives don't seem that bad. I say why not.

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-07 05:02 ID:Heaven

Fuck your car interior, nigga.

4 Name: Torn : 2006-08-07 05:11 ID:tZNaa7zg

lol, I forgot to say I got outside and figured out my sunroof was closed. I screwed myself out of more cuddling. She did say "You'd better go close it" and something about me going home. I'm not sure if that means she wanted me out or what. I think she needed to get up early the next day.

The reason I'm not more gung-ho about this is that I always wanted my first girlfriend to be the one I marry. I already fucked that up and I don't want to fail and make the wrong choice again. Can anyone here speak about the religion gap and how much it'll matter?

5 Name: Shinku : 2006-08-07 05:26 ID:YOaKmIda

Christ, sounds JUST like my first real love. ;_;

Run as far away as possible.

6 Name: Haruhi : 2006-08-07 06:30 ID:koeIc+Z0

I had the whole "marry my first boyfriend" thing going on, but, three ex's later, I've found that's one of those promises to yourself you'll just have to break. All you can really do is give her a chance. You guys seem to get along well enough, at least for now. So long as she doesn't drag you to church all the time, you're cool with the religion thing, right? So long as both of you don't make too much of a fuss about it, it shouldn't be too bad. Actually, one of my friends technically has two religions.XD One of her parents is Jewish and the other is Christian, and they've been rather content in their marriage for about 20-ish years now. It's kinda sweet.<3

Anyway, the religion gap is as much of a gap as you want to make it.

Be careful, though. She seems to be the type to flirt with other guys, even when she's in a relationship; make sure to keep tabs on this. Her ex might've been an ass to you, but, judging from his point of view, he was definitely on to something. She was eyeing other guys(namely you) even though she had a guy already. Banning her from talking to a guy she was flirting with may seem a bit harsh, but it's understandable considering his position at the time. Think up some other ways to keep her eyes on you, especially if you guys start going steady.:)

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-07 12:15 ID:PZQrIYrL

> always wanted my first girlfriend to be the one I marry

two words man, try before you buy.

i'm seconding >>2. it's worth a shot. sure, it probably won't work out in the long run, but if it's only your second relationship that's not exactly a big deal. the point is, it's your life, you might as well have a go at living it.

something to be aware of, though: catholics are the ones with the crazy idea that contraception is bad and marriage is forever. unless you really want her in a family way, don't go knocking her up.

8 Name: Torn : 2006-08-07 16:35 ID:tZNaa7zg

The fact that she agreed to not talk to me for such a long time shows me that she can be devoted when she wants to, I suppose.

9 Name: TokyoJapan22 : 2006-08-07 19:42 ID:IxJNtZIQ

>>2

this guy knows what he's talking about

10 Name: Torn : 2006-08-07 21:35 ID:tZNaa7zg

Am I a bastard if I question my ability to deal with her religion? I just think it's a crutch...

11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-08 01:02 ID:PZQrIYrL

it doesn't need to be an issue. don't get all up in her face about it; if she gets all up in yours, and you're not cool with that, break it off. you can respect her choice to believe without having to believe yourself; if she's worth your time, she'll respect that.

(oh, btw, athiests that go around preaching their superiority are just as arrogant and annoying as the nuts that go around trying to "save" people by conversion to <religion of the month>. fyi.)

12 Name: Torn : 2006-08-10 05:23 ID:tZNaa7zg

Lately she's been sort of spiteful toward the stupid goth whore and she's been hanging out with a lot of other guys. I just think she's too aggressive for me. I guess that's another 2 or 3 years of waiting for me. Doubt I'll ever find someone I can get along with.

13 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-08-13 23:40 ID:Heaven

>>7
I count four words
Name: Link:
Leave these fields empty (spam trap):
More options...
Verification: