Okay, so... I kind of progressed since the last update. I've been through some hard nights, but now it's mostly okay. I have a few physical issues (ie sudden cough & suffocation) that probably are due to too many interiorized feelings and stress, but in my head it is almost fine. I'm doing stuff to keep myself occupied and fixed myself some mid-term objectives, to be sure I'm not drifting away.

There's just one main thing that is bothering me right now. I feel like an ass for how things went when I kind of "confessed" to her. Seriously, that wasn't right at all, I should either have done that with more tact, or more likely not said anything at all. It was, I guess, kind of bluntly... I really do want to apologize for that. It's been some time now, but I don't know if it's enough.

Also I learnt that she and my other friend kind of broke up something like two weeks ago... something not really right about him not returning her calls, I don't really know (and don't want to know, that's not my story). This gives me a weird aftertaste, a mix of relief as things won't be so awkward and tense between us three, and of disappointment in my friend, and of sadness because, well, I always feel like that when a couple in my friends doesn't work out well.

And now with the knowledge of this fact, and the surroundings of Valentine's Day, I think it would really be innappropriate to apologize now.

But is it appropriate at all?