Confessing online (46)

1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-04 22:55 ID:8/iS0smL

I would guess that online confessions are becoming more and more popular so to say..

Do you think its ok, or just stupid(like confessions by sms or something like that)?

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-05 00:53 ID:79wAWevI

It's the wimpy way out, don't do it.

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-05 01:54 ID:Ci4n3H0P

i girl did that for me...
It is very very much not romantic, expect to be rejected right on the spot, or as i did, never get an answer.

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-05 10:59 ID:qmTMYiUy

confession online is pathetic, u should go up to the person and tell them how u feel about her u noe thats how i always do it =)

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-05 11:59 ID:LWGupV45

Depending on how old you are, confessions might be a bit too childish too. At an older age, things are more complex. ie asking them out, getting to know them, then actually dating, rather than admiring from afar.

6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-05 13:24 ID:+iUtrE44

A confession online... maybe not so much. I asked my girlfriend to go out with me online, but it's not like it was a big secret that I wanted to date her. We had gone out a few times before (as friends), and I had set aside a really awesome time to ask her. Unfortunately, things didn't work out, and I only ended up being able to talk to her for a few minutes online that day. Not wanting to lose my nerve and not ask, I just did so online, and she said yes. It wasn't really a confession though, more of just "hey, want to make this official?"

So maybe a "confession" wouldn't be such a good thing. It's better to express your interest in person. Though chatting online can show interest too, it doesn't really beat the face to face thing.

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-05 17:41 ID:nYGN66zX

I'd say if you got close online, tell her how you feel there. Got close in real life, tell her how you feel in real life. It really depends on the girl and the situation, but most of the time I would recommend you tell her in real life.

8 Name: TokyoJapan22 : 2006-10-06 02:57 ID:1RJty0hk

Well Confessing online is a great way to confess one's love especially when your really nervous and what not. It seems more safe cause you don't have to worry about a lot such as "Is everyone looking at me or I'm so nervous I want to run away" It's happened to me before and I did on line too and confessing online seems more safer. But it'll seem very weak too.......=(

9 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-06 04:31 ID:pGkqqzgF

Confessing is silly to begin with! This isn't church, when you tell someone how you feel it should not be like a confession. An online confession would be even more pathetic and unromantic.

10 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-06 04:37 ID:Heaven

Confessing online shows that you have no confidence to look into your love one's eyes and tell her, in person, your true feelings. If you cannot confess in person you don't deserve to have her.

11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-06 08:43 ID:yvvt3NNQ

only confess online if you only know the person online.

I did, he rejected me, he's closer now though, and helping me with sex and understnading me. sort of thereaputic really

12 Name: TokyoJapan22 : 2006-10-06 22:09 ID:1RJty0hk

Look. Confessing online could TOO be romantic! Remember in Densha Otoko, the creator of 2-ch and that one woman talked and fell in love again.

13 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-06 23:08 ID:D4VwjJdg

>>12
He confessed to her in real life.

14 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-07 00:23 ID:Heaven

>>12

Child.

15 Name: TokyoJapan22 : 2006-10-07 05:21 ID:1RJty0hk

>>14
I'm not a child. I'm afraid.

16 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-07 05:42 ID:DVR2+CFq

I've confessed to women in online relationships in which we were very far away from each other. It turned out pretty well, actually. There is some level of emotion depending on how close (personally) you already are when you're talking to them online.

Still, It'd still be better to confess in person if possible. There's a lot more emotion behind it then in just text being sent.

Besides, confessions aren't really that hard to do itself, or at least they shouldn't be. If you feel you need to confess, it should be at the right time, and right when you really mean it and you have to get it out. Timing is the most important factor, really. And since it's a confession, you don't want to fuck up mid-way. Look at that person straight in the eye and speak from your heart (LAME but true).

17 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-07 07:43 ID:1RJty0hk

>>16
True, IT'S EXACTLY WHAT I WAS TRYING TO SAY.

18 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-07 19:22 ID:B/p+YFUL

in this thread: >>15 proves >>14's point

19 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-07 20:36 ID:Heaven

Confessing is always better in person. If there is anyone who has tried both ways and found online confessions more romantic than IRL, then something's wrong with you.
I find it ridiculous that anyone would think confessing online is romantic.

20 Name: 映画男 : 2006-10-08 10:09 ID:qpYOXydk

wat about confessing on the phone? but personlly i think it would be better to confess in person

21 Name: TEENAGER : 2006-10-08 12:23 ID:q690zJdq

Confessing should be done in real life only because:

  1. You can look into her/his(if you swing that way) eyes, which means that you truly mean what you say.
  2. If you confess IRL, she/he will A) Run away [Failure]

B) Kiss you.
If you get B), enjoy your new GF and have a happy ever after!

So yeah, confessing IRL will give you a straightforward answer from your chosen, so there won't be any beating around the bush.
Plus she may admire your courage. [Unless you start to cry like in Densha Otoko, jesus christ. I <SOBSOBSOBSOB> LOVE <MORE SOB> YOU. When you get to that I<HEART>YOU part, it isn't supposed to last 4-6 minutes, damn it!]

But then again, lol I am a teenager. What do I know, I haven't even had a girlfriend.

22 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-08 22:35 ID:Heaven

>>20

Its still better in person. You use the phone or online to set up date with the phone taking first perference. But when it comes to the important stuff, like confessing, do it in person.

23 Name: TokyoJapan22 : 2006-10-10 02:56 ID:1RJty0hk

>>21
Man I love Densha! If I did have the "moment of truth", I'd probably act like Densha. The nervousness, the "What If's", the painful "No".........It will hurt. When your on, and it's your turn to say everything, you got to say everything by heart no matter how long it takes! That's the reason why Densha took so long.

24 Name: 映画男 : 2006-10-10 07:21 ID:qpYOXydk

next time i confess to a girl i will surely do it in person

25 Name: 映画男 : 2006-10-10 07:21 ID:qpYOXydk

next time i confess to a girl i will surely do it in person

26 Name: 映画男 : 2006-10-10 20:11 ID:Heaven

next time i confess to a girl i will surely do it in prison

27 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-16 06:49 ID:YbIXuB3A

I confessed through sms the other day.

28 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-16 08:50 ID:Heaven

I think I would just call her out somewhere and tell her.

29 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-22 20:23 ID:GdpwGFUa

>>1
I'd say its ok. But it depends on the situation, like how well you know oneanother and how well you communicate, that sort of thing. Confessing after chatting for a short time is rather stupid and may at best indicate an immature personality.

I think that online can be very romantic too. It all depends on how well you connect mentally and culturally. Words are not just words, and you need to be able to express your true feelings with words. And - you need to undersrand and respect the other person as well, even if (s)he doesn't want he same thing as you do. (But thats no different than IRL.)

30 Name: MC 900 Ft. Jesus : 2006-10-22 20:47 ID:LqRz28LO

Don't confess. Seriously, NEVER tell a woman you're in love with them until you have them in your arms. It's a horribly bad idea to come on so strong, and it will very likely turn them off to you unless they already feel strongly towards you or are desprate.
If you absolutely feel that you must do this though, don't do it online: you will come off as a spineless, limp dicked coward. Don't do it over the phone, either; it's only slightly less spineless. Face to face is the only acceptable way to do things of this nature.

31 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-22 23:10 ID:Heaven

>>30 agreed.

Confessing usually makes you come off as some stalker weirdo.

32 Name: Minarin : 2006-10-23 02:18 ID:+6cZwUUr

confessing is important <3

33 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-23 04:24 ID:Heaven

>>32 Yeah, if you're like 14 or under.

34 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-23 10:56 ID:u3R8Zb1P

Could someone explain this 'Confessing' thing to me? Is it to say, "I love you"?

35 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-23 17:06 ID:GdpwGFUa

>>30
How true that is!
Confessing is maybe a Hollywood cliche (stereotyped expression; a sentence or phrase, usually expressing a popular or common thought or idea). In the real world it is very unlikely that a girl will fall into your arms as soon as you utter the words "I love you". You'd have to be... a) very handsome or b) very rich and famous ... for that to happen. On the contrary, IRL it would probably scare the h*** out of an unsuspecting girl who is suddenly faced with such a declaration.

However ... (Yes, there is a "however" here I believe :-)

The people who are considering confessing online are probably not the kind of people you'd find around discoes or resturants. They (ahem ...) - we - are more likely to be quieter, more introvert ppl who find it uncomfortable, if not impossible, to go to such places. Let alone talking to strangers, dancing etc etc. Not neccessasarily because we're cowards, but because we quite simply find such places utterly uncomfortable.

If you've chatted online with someone special, you probably know that it is possible to connect very deeply and intimately to another person. It doesn't happen every time. In fact, it is very rare, it's a different kind of magic on another level all together. But it all depepends on how well you communicate, mutually, and that you both are on the same wavelength, quite literarly. It takes time to get there. But when you're there, it'll be obvious. It will all be quite natural. Its more like the meeting of souls rather than the meeting of bodies.

But - tis only what I think. Other ppl may have different xperiencies and ideas about it. I don't know. I'll be glad to read what ppl think.

36 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-23 19:24 ID:KpCViF3C

>>34
Yes.

37 Name: Down and Out : 2006-10-24 13:58 ID:C+EYtyfL

So >>30 >>33, if confessing is a bad idea, then how would you let the other person know how you feel about them? If confessing is something a teenager would use, what would be the mature way to do it?

38 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-25 16:10 ID:u18nJ2oA

>>37
Do nothing.

39 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-25 17:16 ID:6g/VvnkS

Take them out on a date.

40 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-25 18:47 ID:Heaven

>>37

Girls talk, guys act. Girls express their affection with words, guys express it with action. Thats why I don't like confessing because it is a girlish thing to do.

41 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-25 20:48 ID:GrdMi46k

I agree with >>40.

It generally isn't a "guy" thing to do. But it's does somewhat follow the guy-type mantra. It's more direct to go and confess to avoid any sort of miscommunication. Of course, I think that it's just as hard for anyone to do because it's hard to gauge really if you in fact do love that person. These words are should never be taken back either. So you yourself would have to 'know' through and through what the words mean.

I don't have a problem saying 'I love you' to a friend. But I've never really confessed to a romantic partner before. I'm sure it's a bit different...

42 Name: Minarin : 2006-10-26 01:52 ID:LOQUF1FU

>>33

how is confessing love only important to 14-year-olds? stupid thought you should reconsider.

43 Name: Minarin : 2006-10-26 02:14 ID:LOQUF1FU

>>38

do nothing. aka = stay single.

44 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-26 05:50 ID:Heaven

Confessing love to a person who doesn't know you very well creeps the person out VERY MUCH. You seem like a loser. Maybe after developing a deeper friendship with the person, it'd be less creepy.

So ask her out on a date first.

45 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-26 14:18 ID:J0SMjyrY

Don't confess love at all! Just go on dates, etc. Never say "I love you" in a serious way untill after you've had sex. It'll just scare girls away otherwise.

46 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-10-26 15:47 ID:Heaven

Ugh, just do what comes naturally.

Sometimes it might make sense to confess, other times it would work against you. It's really impossible to generalize, heck, what if your girl/guy liked that kind of stuff?

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