This is going to sound pathetic, but I honestly do NOT have a clue about these things.
How do you know when someone is interested in you? How can you tell the difference between "interested" and "friendly"? And...any suggestions on how I can learn to figure these things out for myself since I feel helplessly clueless...?
Read girls' body language... There will some hints that a girl will give it to you. But guys are bad with body language signs... So we(guys) all need to practice on it. And this body language thing is quite true.
Or you can ask the girl directly but... MMM i don't know ha ha ha If that will turn out well.
I guess you have to develop this sense over time. Try to analyse all the social exchanges you've had with that person. What might be the motivations behind them, who initiated them, how did they end up, what did they produce, how did those developments affect the party member's subsequent behavior?
What can you read between the lines?
This is a problem I can fully agree with... Personally, I think people should have icons to carry around like IM status icons that say "Interested", "Friendly", "Do not approach", etc! lol! (It would make this whole "are they available, are they interested, etc..." thing a whole lot easier!
My personal gauge is how much interaction with that person they initiate, as well as how open they are about things beyond casual conversation... Eg: did she IM you first to say "Hey, how's it goin", did she keep on talking about her home & life & troubles & such, when normal conversation would've dried up before that..
...part of the fun of it is to figure it out xD
imo anyway
Noooo... Not fun... More like agonizing torture... Is she for real, is she interested in me, or is this just friendly chit-chat with someone...
Yeah especially for those of us who take rejection bad.
>>8
That, and the feeling of "I'm looking for someone to have a real relationship with, and if you're only wanting to be having a casual friendly conversation, then I'm putting all this effort & time trying to find out if you're interested in me, and the conversation means more than meets the eye, when I wouldn't need to put that effort forth and could just enjoy the conversation, if I knew..."
I just wish there was a way to tell, ahead of time, so you would have either enjoy a regular friendly conversation with someone or have a serious, "relationship-related" talk, mabye leading to something real...
>>4
yeah good point about them initiating conversations. thats often a good sign, especially if its more than just normal smalltalk topics. one of my friends once told me that if a girl confides in you about problems (eg boyfriend troubles) then it often means theres a slight interest there, but im not too sure on that one.. i think if shes telling you really personal secret stuff that nobody else knows thats definately a good sign but still with the chance of falling into friendship
>>9
try to go into the conversation with a frame of mind that you dont feel dejected if she isnt interested in more than friendship. i find its good to enter all conversations with girls without aiming for more than friendship. you have to play each game as it develops so that youll be pleased with a result even if its friendship - if you aim specifically for more than friendship youll feel bad and wont be able to let go of feelings if she says that she just wants to be friends. it sucks to get hung up on 1 girl who doesnt want you, and yeah its normal to feel bad if you get turned down by someone you liked, but the best way to get over it is to meet more people and you may find someone else you like even more and that she likes you.
WHat if I'm looking for someone to kill humanity.