Okay, I've talked to my brother about our situation. I was planning to tell him that i'll never be able to feel the same way about him but things didn't exactly work out that way. I started out by asking him what was wrong with him these past days and he was like "you should know" blah blah. Anyways, i ended up telling him the truth. It just came out, i wasn't planning on saying anything about my own feelings but he just looked so sad and i don't know...i just wanted him to know that i liked him too...i thought he deserved to know. So yeah, i told him everything, my feelings, my doubts, etc. He was really happy. He told me he was really relieved and that he thought that he had messed things up for us by telling me his feelings and that i didn't like him anymore, which is why he's been feeling so depressed lately. But anyways, i did tell him that nothing can come of it, even though we both have feelings for each other because it would never work out. He said that he realizes that too but he couldn't help the way he felt for me, and then...he kissed me! And i kind of kissed him back. It felt so natural to kiss him...but afterwards i realized what we had just done and it felt so wrong. But yeah..he kissed me again after that. I knew i should've stopped him but i didn't...i couldn't even think straight because i was so nervous. Anyways, I told him how confused i am about all this and he completely understands. I don't think i'll be writing about this anymore...i need to discuss all this with him. I just wanted you all to know what happened i guess and thank you all for trying to help me, even though i'm more lost now than ever and am probably really screwed up right now lol.