Girls with kids (16)

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-01-21 04:48 ID:KAuqvgjF

My advice: don't try to be the kids "daddy" unless you marry her. Believe me, being friendly with a chick's dog is a good way to "get in" with her, but using the kid this way is all kinds of trouble. Even if you don't mean for it to happen, a kid can get really hurt and confused by people who are there for a while and then just stop coming by when they break up with their mother. The kid will likely be angry and depressed over the stress between its parents anyway, so adding your shit into the mix is more likely to confuse it more than anything, regardless how good your intentions are.

Avoid the "white knight" complex when it comes to her relationship with her ex-husband. That's her business and her problem (unless he's beating the shit out of her or something, and even then it's the cops' problem and not yours). Getting all macho and tough-guy may seem appropriate to the moment, but likely won't translate into what's best over the long run.

Outside of those two common pitfalls the only thing you really need to remember is that women with children are the same as women without children, except they have the massive responsibility of taking care of a child.

The cynical side of me says don't mess around with any woman who's not already divorced and making ends meet on her own (or at least without your help). You might not be playing "White Knight", but she just may be using you as one, consciously or not.

I'm divorced man with children, so my perspective comes from that experience.

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