so i used to really like this girl the kind where you cry on your bed at night just because someone so wonderful exist but in the end it didn't work out. fast forward about 10 years later i'm still single because i don't have any interest in other woman romanticly but i'm getting lonely because at this age most off my friends spends their time with their girlfriend and i don't really get to hang out with anyone much.
theres this girl lets call her B who has been a wonderful friend to me literally my entire life. shes also single,lonely and have trouble finding a guy because shes shy and it takes a while for her to open up to someone.
so should i ask B out? i mean i really care for her as a friend and in the end isn't a good friend a good wife material rather then someone you love passionately like the first girl because all fire will eventually go out? or is it wrong to start a relationship with these thought
i will ask you, think of her as a girlfriend, and not as a friend. Do you like her as a girlfriend? Do you feel attracted to her physically ? Do you love her? If not, don't bother. You will only hurt her.
well i'm not attracted to her physically but i'm not repulsed or anything shes just normal looking. what do you mean by seeing her as a girlfriend? i enjoy spending time with her, we share similiar value on most things. as for whether i love her i sure care about her and i want her to be happy but if u mean if i dream about her at night and stuff then no.
>>3
I think your hesitation should answer your own question. It doesn't sound like you actually like her that way- it just sounds like you are getting desperate. Don't ruin that friendship just because you are starting to feel desperate for companionship.
You'll find someone- just wait it out.
If it's your best shot at the dream, I say give it your best effort.
I believe your acknowledgment that passion fades away means you are more ready to settle down than the majority of engaged couples.
> Do you like her as a girlfriend?
I don't think that's a prerequisite for being a girlfriend.
> Do you feel attracted to her physically ?
Lust dies, gravity always wins.
More is needed than that to base a life together.
> Do you love her?
Love grows, love fades.
Some couples have married for reasons other than love and on that have based a better marriage than any high school sweethearts could ever hope for.
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>>1
to be honest, you shouldnt. from my experience, at least, it doesnt work that way. how she is feeling(lonly or whatever) shouldnt be your business. youve got to worry more about your own business for yourself to be happy. thats what i really think.