Alright, this is probably somewhat different than most posts. I consider myself to be a pariah, and as such I have no interest in romantic issues and avoid them like the plague.
A dear friend of mine, however, is not so lucky.
We've known one another since fifth grade, both being new kids who happened to have extremely similar interests. We've pretty much been good friends since, although things have become strained over the past few years just because of a lack of communication.
Regardless, we're both seniors in high school now. Apparently he met a girl sometime around December who took a liking to him. Eventually she asked him out, and his character flaw led him to accept.
It turns out he has never felt a physical attraction towards her and only did so because he saw her as a nice person and didn't want to hurt her feelings. Five months down the road and he has essentially been shown that she is a walking time bomb brimming with emotional issues.
I could be off on the timing, but it's a general idea of how long this has been going on.
Anyhow, my friend is getting extremely uncomfortable in the situation. She's becoming far more unstable and clingy by the week. In fact, the girl is now talking about things like marriage (which of course is ridiculous, considering her age).
It's quite likely that she would do something very bad to herself if my friend just up and left her, hence his reluctance to end things. I think it's the only reason he isn't doing so.
My question is: how can I help him? I'm not expecting much of anything from you guys (no offense), because this is kind of a tricky situation. All I know is it drove him to start talking to me again, even though we rarely see one another these days.
Tell the friend to dump her, notify school counselor/her parents etc that maybe that she's unstable and might need support.
I agree with >>2.
If he doesn't really like her then staying with her will only make them both unhappy. Tell her to dump her gently, but dump her-- if he's unhappy, she'll be unhappy as well, so breaking up will be better for the both of them.
Do tell him to notify someone in charge, though; I'd say the counselor is best, because the parents might not want to have much to do with the boy who is rejecting their daughter, you know?
> My question is: how can I help him?
You can't. You don't.
> My question is: how can I help him?
Make her your girlfriend.
Because shes so emotional, and he's been with her for months now, she sees him as a beacon of light amongst the darkness. (That sounded emo I know) So she is clinging on to him as much as possible because in her eyes, she is the only one she can trust.
This however, is a bad thing. If/when he does break up with her, she is most likely going to become an emotional wreck and either one of two things will happen.
1) She Cries her heart out to him, in hopes of him taking her back
2) She goes psycho and stalks him, never leaving him alone.
either way he'll be rid of her in the end. girls in high school talk about marriage all the time. HS girls are stupid that way. breaking up with her is fine- if she really is that unstable- she shouldn't be dating anyways and should be seeking help. do not delay the inevitable