As the name of this thread suggests, I've been out of the whole dating-thing for too long. I have had a girlfriend before, but that was years ago. Then I essencially got really depressed, but I've managed to straighten myself out, and got my life back on track.
And now... after searching for so long, I've found a girl I want to actually be with. I'm picky with my women, but more in terms of personality, rather than looks, and believe that makes it extra hard to find anyone remotly dateable...
About the girl... we met last weekend (through mutual friends), and we talked a whole lot. Eventually I got her AIM, and yesterday she gave me her phone number, out of the blue. Which is great.
Well, she said she was 'feeling nice' when she gave me her phone number... so I don't really know. One thing that worries me is that she was talking (with my mutual friends) about her mom saying that she should get a boyfriend, and she complained about only really liking someone once (which is kind of my situation, heh).
Ok, now for the questions?:
1)How do I sound interested without sounding TOO interested? Both on the 'net and in real life. I can't be with her more often because she lives a bit far away from me, but it's not exactly a long distance affair, if you know what I mean.
2)When to make the move? Kind of a stupid question I know, because I kinda know the answer already... that I should make the move when I'm ready, but...
Help me, 4-ch! I'll post updates.
Bah, she was online, but I was busy working. D:
Keep up conversation with her, and eventually ask "Hey, if you're not doing anything this weekend, wanna hang out"? Take the whole boyfriend/liking slowly with her, and you can also slip in comments along the way, should that topic come up about "Yeah, my mother was saying the same thing about me finding a girlfriend"
The important thing is to keep it casual, be confident, and be relaxed, but, for lack of a better word, "flirty"... Also, IRL is far better than any kind of IM, so even if you call her to ask (and say "I haven't been on IM lately, I've been working, so I wanted to catch you this way, I hope you weren't busy"), it's again, far better, since even if you're not there, your voice conveys far more emotion & inflection than IM ever could hope to; Avoid IM like the plague until you're more established with her, if at all possible;
Yea, as >>3 says, go on a date with her, and if she's starting to talk to you more (showing interest) ask her if she could imagine to hang out with you more often.
If the time comes ask her out!
Don't be meek about the asking her out thing, just be casual. "Hey, let's go to __ on __(day or time). They have a really nice/interesting __ blahblah."
Two sentences = all you should need to say.