errrr, help? (27)

1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-26 08:47 ID:03QwAhd+

so, here's my issue
i'm into this girl, and she broke up with her bf of about 8 or 9 months. her longest relationship. it's been a few weeks, and then i called her up and we decided to hang out. we went to the mall and ended up sitting around in this little closed out area. we started talking, cuddling, eskimo-kisses, etc. i'm sure that if i made the move we could have made out, but i dont think she's that kinda girl. so, we go our seperate ways, and i tell her that i have friday open from work (i work every day this week except) and that we should go see a movie...
she hasnt messaged me back, we talk once and a while, but i keep forgetting to bring up the movie. she doesnt seem to be as energetic as she used to be when talking to me. and idk, i'm getting a bad vibe. she also doesnt respond to my txt messages. she used to =P

so. what's going on, is there any advice to give, etc.

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-26 09:21 ID:/TnlVrRv

She's not interested anymore. And obviously you aren't neither. Forgetting to bring up the movie? Come on.

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-27 10:16 ID:03QwAhd+

okay, to be honest i'm just scared to bring up the movie because of how unresponcive she's been. seriously, even if she not interested anymore she'd be more responsive than this...

Me: hey, what's up?
her: nm, just listening to music. you?
Me: bad day at work =P i burnt my arm... the hoses in the store really suck and leak all over.
her: oh, i'm sorry
Me: yea, it'll be fine though xD i ran it under some cold water already
her: cool
Me: i'm excited though, i get paid and have tomorrow off!!!
her: o yea
Me: mhmmm
her: i gotta go
her: good night
-sign off-

and this was all within like... 5-10 minutes. lots of me waiting for her to respond. Even if she's not interested in me, we've hung out in the past and are friends. and now boom. nothing

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-27 12:16 ID:44qpc4d7

>>3
Talk less about yourself.
Ask more about her.

5 Name: Anonette : 2008-06-27 13:04 ID:QUEtTDeY

>>2

He could also be nervous
>>3
She might have been busy at the time to have a full blown conversation, though if a lot of your convos are like that now it might be a red flag.

>>4
Or find something you have in common and talk about that, like a favorite band

6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-27 19:13 ID:03QwAhd+

yea, so basically i asked if she was doing anything today and she just said maybe. i'm taking that as a red flag. From the way i've used it, Maybe is just a way to get out of doing something with someone i found annoying without directly saying "no i dont want to hang out with you" so... i'm gonna leave her alone for a while

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-28 06:22 ID:5GHn4bAC

Yeah, give her some time and ease back into things. And if she stays cold, then forget her. It's not the end of the world. Best of luck.

8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-28 08:22 ID:/TnlVrRv

>>6 Mh, maybe something happened, in her family or something. You should ask her. If there's something wrong, she might be happy you care. If not, its a good opportunitiy for her to tell you to gtfo. (Hey, at least you'll know what's going on)

9 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-28 13:50 ID:GzJDj4DN

>>cuddling, eskimo-kisses, etc

You did that and you DIDN'T make out already?

Well I know why she's not interested in you. You're just her little boy toy and she's decided you don't have enough spine to date her.

10 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-28 16:27 ID:PG/BqCmz

>>9 Not a boy toy, worse...A FRIEND

11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-28 18:35 ID:03QwAhd+

yea, who know's. I dont know, i was trying to get a big group movie thing going last night and it failed, then she said she would make it up to me by going to a movie tonight >.>
who know's. maybe something will happen. maybe something wont. it's just weird.

but then i realized last night while on the shitter (you get lots of thinking done there) i've got all summer. this is just the first week of summer for me! i still got 2 months left =3 no rush

12 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-29 02:21 ID:Heaven

>>11
Crank it up before attraction dies down, if there is any that is.

13 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-29 05:25 ID:03QwAhd+

well, i just got back from the movie. Made the first move by taking the hand rest between us, moving it up, holding her hand, and have her head lean on my shoulder. that's all that really happend. I made it kinda a group things, so nothing really coulda happend without it being awkward xD
but, she said she wants to come over to my place sometime this week and watch Juno =P i'm gonna try shoot for a day when no one is home so it'll be jsut me and her

14 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-29 05:58 ID:K7oDiyG8

Kiss her.

15 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-29 07:13 ID:03QwAhd+

>>14
trust me. if i can get her to my house, with no one home then i will.

16 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-29 11:12 ID:44qpc4d7

>>13
Learn the generic song (or the ending one), and tell her you really love this one when it comes on screen and sing along.

17 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-29 19:35 ID:03QwAhd+

op here,
>>16
to be honest, i love juno xDDDD and so, i do actually know the lyrics to that song, and i do like it =P i like living where i do, because the guys arnt afraid to admit they like girly movies like Juno, so i dont feel so weird about it lol

18 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-29 21:44 ID:44qpc4d7

>>17
Actually I do too. I think you got the idea then if you know the lyrics why it would be fun to sing that to her.

19 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-30 10:20 ID:FHS/gefe

Apparently you paid too much attention to the movie.

20 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-01 07:44 ID:03QwAhd+

OP here again
this is what's confusing me about her the most...
when i ask her if she wants to hang out, she'll kinda try to avoid the subject or just not answer if in a text message. It gives me the feeling that she really does not want to hang out with me at all ; ;

but then, when we really are hanging out in person it's like she's having the time of her life.
sooooo, just wondering if anyone know's what the fuck is goin on?

21 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-02 02:48 ID:RI0Ff0iI

Well if you think about it she did just break up with her boyfriend that she had been going out with for a while it would be natural to be kind of disinterested with dating in general. She could be acting really happy around you in person because for her its a response to a certian situation possibly its just something she is used to. It could be she is just using you to get over her ex

22 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-03 05:05 ID:03QwAhd+

well, nvm on how long she was dating her ex. it turns out to only have been 5 months =P i thought it was a lot longer. After about 2-3 weeks she should have sprung back from a short relationship yea?

23 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-03 06:09 ID:K7oDiyG8

I know that after breaking up with my ex, the last thing I wanted was to date anyone. I'd been clung to, subtly manipulated, and generally miserable, and it felt AMAZING to not belong to anyone.

Or she might have been hurt and simply not trust guys at the moment.

Do you know why she and him broke up? It might shed light onto the situation?

24 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-04 07:06 ID:03QwAhd+

OP here,
well i guess i can understand why she would want to stay away from dating for a while. seeing as how the reason they broke up was because her BF broke up with her for another girl, who he is now dating.
so, i'll back off for a while.
and hopefully, no guy will make a move and get her before i do =P

25 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-08 06:33 ID:03QwAhd+

OP with update...
i think she's gonna get back together with her ex. he broke up with the girl he dumped her for and they hung out today for the whole day. apperantly they kept in contact after the break up and he complained to her about all the trouble he was having with the new girl. they broke up. and now they hung out all day.

I never had a chance...

26 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-08 07:24 ID:QUEtTDeY

>>25

That's not true, she just lonely and is willing to put up with his shit. There's a good chance he's going to do the same exact thing over again, but this time over, make sure you don't back off.

27 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-09 18:33 ID:03QwAhd+

>>26
yea, i know. And the chances of him doing it again are idk. he's not really the most desirable person in the world. he probably wouldnt do it again unless he knew he could get with another girl.

but yea, just of this morning they're back together. we're supposed to hang out today, but i'm not sure if she still wants to, or if i still want to even...
w/e, all part of life i guess

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