I'm a girl and I've been struggling with this dilemma for quite some time. The thought of masturbating to someone I know makes me feel guilty. It's really hard, though, because this one guy-friend of mine turns me on like nothing else, and sometimes just thinking about him causes me to go into super-horny-mode. I used to have problems imagining us kissing and having sex, but I'm over that now and imagine having sex with him all the time, and usually in great detail.

But I can't act upon it in any way. It feels like I'm raping him when I fantasize. I don't have his permission to be "doing" this to him, and it makes me feel bad a lot of the time.

And when I'm imagining us going at it, I sometimes get the urge to masturbate, but it doesn't even feel like it would be satisfying. I don't just want sexual stimulation, I want him. ;___;

It would be flattering to know he masturbates to me, but only if their was a genuine feeling of love attached to it. If I knew he was wanking to me just because he merely had a generic carnal lust for me like the sort he could have for just any woman, I would hate him.