I screwed up (5)

1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-09-08 06:17 ID:U2Z/IBfH

Hey everyone. I ended up confessing my feelings to a friend the other day. I met him about a month ago at an anime convention. After we found each other online a few days afterwards, we talked pretty much constantly over AIM and text messages during that time, and by the time we were able to hang out in person about a week ago (he lives about 7 hours away from me) I had realized my feelings for him. I was convinced that he felt the same way about me as well. So I told him quite simply about what I felt, and he sort of turned me down; he said that the distance would be hard for him, but he would have accepted me if we lived closer together.

Now our conversations are kind of awkward and stunted; he seems uncomfortable with talking to me, and I feel incredibly stupid for telling him. I realize there's not really much I can do now, but... is there anything I could do? >_> I just want our friendship back.

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-09-08 06:54 ID:Heaven

Be mature about it. Tell him you understand he could be a little embarrassed but there really is no need to, you're not desperate and it's okay just being friends. That until the day you're closer you won't bother, stuff like that. In short, make it something not important.

But I guess it depends on how you made your confession. If it was really dramatic and desperate, then yeah, you screwed up and I'm not sure you can do anything.

3 Name: 9kon : 2008-09-08 06:55 ID:MH30LwLo

Just be completely honest with him. I understand thats got to be very hard considering the awkwardness but the fact is in the end both of you agree on having a friendship. Be confident and tell him things havent been sitting well with you since the whole confession and you just want assurance he still wants a meaningful relationship with you. In other words you just want to put the ordeal in the past, you have acknowlodged your hastyness.

Remember word this however you want, but DO NOT pretend everything is still okay because the fact is you know its not. Bring him somewhere alone, and away from alot of people before you tell him about what you feel. The last thing you need is your environment throwing you off. Also refrain from telling him about everything on SMS, email, or IM. Although what I'm about to tell you is cliche` its ABSOLUTELY true. Over the interwebz it just doesent mean as much. Do this face to face.

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-09-08 07:07 ID:U2Z/IBfH

>>2
No, I wasn't dramatic about it at all, I made it clear that all I wanted was to let him know and that I'll be just fine remaining friends with him. I admitted to him that it felt awkward telling him that, and even that I'm sorry that I said it since it felt like I was scaring him off, but he said it was alright and that I shouldn't be sorry. Yet he's still being kind of distant. :<

>>3
I'd tell him face-to-face, but we live too far away from each other for that to be convenient. :<

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-09-08 07:17 ID:MH30LwLo

Maybe telling him how you feel over the phone would be better then. Also how do you both see each other if you live so far away? If you are thinking that telling him in person would take too long I totally agree. Making the dialogue strictly between yourselves is important but its also good to strike while the iron is hot. Take advantage of how you feel now and if phoning him is the best option then try that.

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