so, here's my story of fail
there's a girl i've been into the past few months. it's basically like we've been dating, it's just we wouldnt really show it in public. i asked her out one night a month or so ago and she said she doesnt know. we talked about it last week and she doesnt know if she wants to date or not because we used to fight A LOT. she doesnt want to be with a guy where all she would do with him is fight. so, i've been getting better on that.
and now, here's where the fail comes in
I go off and spend $40 on roses and candy for her. 12 red, 1 white. i write a cheezed out note saying something like "the first 12 represent the other girls in the world, the white rose represents you. you stand out the most from all of them" and a bunch of other cheezy crap. i end the note asking her out. so, i drive over to her place, put it on the hood of her car (flowers and note) and i hide. i call her and tell her to come outside, and she gets all excited and what not. i come out from my hiding spot and she's even more excited. by now, i'm thinking "yes, i've got it for sure. she's gonna say yes" but you know what i get as a response?
"i'm gonna have to think about it"
i just play it off likedont really mind, that it doesnt really hurt at all so that i dont make her feel bad about it... but seriously. i go through all that trouble, pull a bunch of favors to get directions to her house and to get a ride (I'm really bad with directions. so we had to pick up a friend that knew how to get there) and i mean seriously... She's sick, like she caught something that was going around school, and she used that as part of the excuse but i mean come on... after all that trouble...
fuck.
from my previous experience - nothing good ever comes out from indecisive girls... I don't think she's worth being in relationship with you after not saying yes when you did something that nice and also been trying to change for her because of that fighting
Dude she is a waste of your time. If she can’t appreciate you after all of that she isn’t worth your time. You Can Do Better.
I think you're doing it wrong. Red roses usually mean love, and white purity/childhood/friendship. Also, you're not supposed to offer 13 roses (or, I think, any flower). Oh, well, that's just symbolics, it's the intent that counts, right?
Maybe is girltalk for no.
DUMP HER AND FUCKING MOVE ON. DONT BE FRIENDS, JUST DISAPPEAR AND MEET NEW PEOPLE.
"i need to think" = 70% dumped...
if you wait and still hoping for her = 100% dumped...
why? because it would reflected trough your eyes that you are still waiting for the aswer and that gives her pressure... at the end she woud said no...
it's better if you don't think about it anymore and just move on with your life.
you would be so depressed when she dumped you, and she won't got any pressure from you...
but...
if she never don't mention about it in 1 week.... it means she's indecisive...
if that happened then refer to >>2 and >>3.
OP here... what i need now are tips on how to move on.
she was over tonight, and we started making out and all that and getting sexual. then she stopped me. we started talking about stuff, she started saying how "stressful" the whole situation is on her. so of course, i ask what's stressing her out. she said that me, the situation i put her in, and everything that's going on in her life. so of course, i ask what's been going on.
I didnt notice the new ring on her finger (pinky) apperantly some guy went over to her house yesterday (v-day) and gave it to her. either that or she went to his house. i didnt ask. and they started watching TV and he kissed her. i freaked out when she told me that, and asked if she kissed him back and she says she "doesnt remember". she keeps using herself being sick as an excuse. i wanted to say "you're sick, not retarded", but it never came out.
she then starts getting mad at me for being mad at her saying stuf flike "you know, i'm not your girlfriend. i was never you girlfriend so you shouldn be getting mad at me. i didnt do anything." this is from the girl who just yesterday was calling me "babe", "baby", and "sweetie"...
i start trying to explain to her how she makes it feel like i'm her bf, and how i do have a right to be angry, and she keeps on bringing up how i'm not her boyfriend right now, so i shouldnt be mad. she just keeps on talking as if it's not a big deal, but to me, it is a big fucking deal! fuck, as far as i know, i'm the guy who's treated her the best through these past couple months, better than any other guy has ever treated her. and now, i'm just done. after talking to her, it's clear she's just toying with my feelings and being a bitch. she told me "i never said i wanted a boyfriend right now". aperantly she's been going over a fucking list of reasons on why she should, and shouldnt date me. I mean, fuck. i'm just fucking done with her shit.
so... tips on how to get over someone? because i fell for her... hard...
There is an old maxim, and it is quite true. It has lasted the ages due to its truthfulness. Time heals all wounds. EMotional, or physical, mental. Just block her off, don't talk to her anymore, and be outgoing and talk to as many new people as you can. If you already have a lot of friends then have fun with them, otherwise make new friends! Fill the gap with new people, but people you want to be around. You'll find a new girl eventually, maybe one who isn't as callous as your former love interest.
You wanted to move on? Just watch a lot of porns, do anything you like, play games, read stuffs. That's how I got over my crush last month. I sent her a good bye email, blocked her MSN, didn't visit her blog, and deleted her from my friendster list.
Either go along with >>10 or >>12, or it seems that all she wants is your dick. That's gonna be harder, but might work if you get all cold-hearted and cut the feeling crap. At least you'll probably screw her "current" relationship by doing such.
But I wouldn't advise you very strongly to be that "nasty". It takes a lot of strength, and might not be worth it.
Ditch her. You made it perfectly clear how you felt about her. She wants all of the affection and none of the commitment. You sound like a nice guy and don’t deserve this kind of crap. Best thing to do is block her of completely and find someone new. The two best ways to move on are:
1) Find someone new (a nice and enjoyable option)
2) Pretend like she doesn’t exist and shut down all major emotions that have to do with her.
2 can be hard but it is a useful skill to have for life. Good luck.