I don't know what to do (9)

1 Name: AnonymousMan7 : 2009-06-18 02:15 ID:Heaven

Well, here I go:

In the personal issues section there was a question about if you believe in love. I said yes, but as of rite now, I'm not sure. There is a girl who has stolen my heart. She knows I like her a lot and that I care for a lot as if she was the world. But she says she only sees me as a good friend. I kinda had a hard time taking it in. But a couple of weeks ago, she told me that she had a gotten a bf. I felt so crushed, so heartbroken. I felt like my soul had diminished and my heart stop beating. I felt asphyxiated and I didn't know what to do. But I told her that she knows I'm always there for her and that I will always care for her the way I did, and I still do. I had seen her that day, but it was not for long. After that day, we stopped talking for a while. Only a couple days later did we begin to talk again. Then we stopped after that day again. I've talked to her again since then, but not much. I haven't seen her either. The thing that gets me the most is her bf. I know him and I don't like him at all. I mean I wouldn't be mean to guy or talk smack, that's just not me. But I know him well enough to know that he always fool women to get what he wants. He's hurt so many girls that I know that went out with him. I don't want her to get hurt. I mean if she is happy, I am, and I know that's a lie to my heart, but I don't want her hurting in anyway. That's what is getting me currently. I still like her a lot, and I will always be there for her, but I just don't know what to do right now.

2 Name: Ryuuchi : 2009-06-18 03:49 ID:VJNx64u6

I believe it's right to respect someone's space when it comes to that kind of situation. You are in good terms with her as a friend so do what you need to do as role of being a good friend for her. I think that when you do she will realize that there is someone like you who actually cares deeply about her.

I think what you need to do is respect her space and do what you gotta do as a friend. If she gets hurt, that's where you come in. =)

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-06-18 19:19 ID:DSF48b9G

>>2 got it right. It's not your job to interfere with her love life, but you can offer support when requested to do so.

But really, go out more, there are many other great girls to love, don't waste your time with these kind of situations.

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-06-18 22:47 ID:QG5wSFjp

Just don't let her use you. I don't mean to be a misogynist, but sometimes women can use guys as support crutches. It's such a tired, oft-repeated story--guy likes girl, becomes close friend; girl uses guy for support and goes for the tough asshole. I'm sick of hearing this story.

Do both of yourselves a favor, and stay away from the whole mess. Like >>3 said, go out more. I'm not saying you shouldn't support her at all, just don't let yourself get drawn in or obsessed because you'll only get hurt more.

5 Name: AnonymousMan7 : 2009-06-19 01:03 ID:Heaven

>>4

i know that I should just probably forget about it. But unlike any other girl I have either gone out with or liked, she is completely different. We have so much in common, share common views, like the same stuff, and understand each other completely. and its hard forgetting now because the times we spent together continually appear within my mind. Its as if they happened yesterday. Now when I go to stores or any place, there is always a song that will come up that reminds me of her, or I'll see something that reminds me of her. I just don't know what to do. I have even thought I have forgotten, then she would appear in my mind again. But something that I wanna stick to is something that Ryuuchi told me, communication. If I could simply be there for her, I would love that.

I know >>4 that you probably are sick of that kind of story, and I don't blame you. I'm trying not to think about it as much as possible.

6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-06-20 03:04 ID:QG5wSFjp

>>5
In that case, I wish you the best of luck. As long as you don't expect anything more, you can be happy. But if you feel yourself getting jealous and frustrated, then you will know it's time to move on.

7 Name: AnonymousMan7 : 2009-06-20 03:37 ID:Heaven

>>6
I know, I mean I would love to be with her so much. I miss her everyday and every minute. But I could be there for her, that would be fine with me too.
And I thank you for words of wisdom.

8 Name: Mu : 2009-06-21 22:49 ID:u6/nPa11

Maybe you should tell her what you think of the guy. If she were my friend, I know I would. Don't push it too hard, but tell her that you know him and what he's like. If she gets it, good for her. If not... well, you tried.

I can tell you that, if you do want to give up, the pain will get better in time. It may still hurt, but it becomes somewhat bareble.

But, if you don't want to, you should do as you want, and always be there for her. Maybe someday she'll see.

Good luck!

9 Name: AnonymousMan7 : 2009-06-22 05:55 ID:Heaven

>>8
I know what you are saying. I'm afraid to hurt her. I don't want her to see me as the bad guy. I told her to be careful. Hell if he does hurt her in any way, the floor he stands on will become his grave, but I don't want her hurt. I hoping that one day she would understand. Its just so hard right now. I'm trying not to think about it, but it kinda hard. I'm still talking to her though, like Ryuuchi told me, so it all good there! But I'm just hoping for the best.

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