Just Wondering... (7)

1 Name: JW : 2009-08-17 16:34 ID:PghjbkPt

While a couple of guy friends and I were bored, we decided to talk about past relationships. Both of them had exes, but they mentioned how over time, they had eventually losing interest in their girlfriends, up to the point where one of the guys said he "hated" his girlfriend.

As a girl who's only 2 1/2 months into her "first" relationship (technically second, but I don't count the first one since it was more of a pity thing), I kind of have this underlying fear that my boyfriend will start to "hate" me as well. I don't expect him to marry me, but I'd rather that when/if we break up, it'll be on amiable terms and we can still be friends, rather than having him start to hate me and then dump me.

So my question is to all you guys out there that can relate, how does it happen, that you start to lose interest in your girlfriend? Assuming you're the one to have asked her out, isn't it odd that you can simply lose your feelings for her? Please expand!

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-08-17 17:33 ID:fsK8LnNi

There are many reasons to lose interest in your partner. Regardless of them, it does not mean that you must finish the relationship feeling bad about each other. I know plenty of exs who became good friends (and also some examples where things ended on less positive terms).

3 Name: 43 : 2009-08-17 22:33 ID:7ttJo3A0

I remember that happened with my first couple of gf's. You don't really need to post this online to find your answer. Just look at the couples around you. Yes, it does happen to some. But there also are couples that last for ages.

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-08-17 23:52 ID:bJweGOB0

Just try to keep communication with your partner 'till the end. It's the lack of communication that makes things go sour.

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-08-18 06:30 ID:h3ot1ELc

>>4
And when that becomes tough to do, it'll only be more awkward to try any further. Keeping in contact isn't necessarily hard, but being able to talk amiably is what makes or breaks a relationship. And if it ends because of that, it's not exactly going to result in friendship - what good is a friend you can't exactly talk well with? Henceforth, when you find conversing with your partner boring, or you find it is only you that attempts to strike a meaningful conversation, the relationship will most likely end, soon. Not necessarily with hate as its product, but friend will not be an outcome.

6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-08-18 09:47 ID:nkuwgfUW

The more you think about it, the more it eats at you and affects everything you do around him. You'd probably start to crave his attention, or become paranoid when he's with another girl. In that sense, it would become a self fulfilling prophecy, because in the fear of him losing interest in you, you'll start to do things you won't normally do, become clingy, etc, and he'll find that less attractive.

I think if you live more in the moment, worry less, and just be yourself around him, he'll either love it or hate it. You can't do much if he doesn't like the real you, but it's better than pretending to be something you're not for years to come. Your guy friends seem to have gone out with girls who have pretended to be something they're not, and eventually realised that. Anyway, bottom line is that if you and him are true with one another, then I'm pretty sure you'll be able to keep that amiable relationship even if you do break up.

7 Name: Keitaro : 2009-08-19 00:29 ID:QbMZy3Al

For me as a guy I can't say that I have seen that sort of thing I mean I'm in a relationship right now and me and her have been together for almost a year now and so far I havent hate her yet nor started to dislike here..I think if your boyfriend started hating you for some reason I would say it could be what you did or how you treated your relationship or to some pety reasons like you dont wanna do this or that,,sometimes your boyfriend will hate that but this only applies to really stupid guys that don't care about you

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