internet love (10)

1 Name: stunned : 2009-10-06 06:28 ID:UTS+AUqJ

i'm a normal guy.
i have a life, am relatively attractive and do the things most people my age should be doing.
just normal.
i am stuck at a point in my life where itis getting hard to meet new people. I have just started at a new college, and most of the people there just don't interest me. Specifically, there are no attractive girls there who interest me.

I have started talking to a girl over msn,and i thinki've fallen for her. I don'tknow how,I've always thought internet romance was bullshit, butI've been in love before and know that this is it allover again.

She's fucking lovely. Half Taiwanese half Chinese, smart as anything, very funny and so affectionate. We've had phone calls and webcam chats.

I think she may feel the same way,but I just don't know what to do. I'm in London, and she's in Leeds. If I reveal that I may have feelings for her, what will happen?
because I think i actually NEED her.

Thanks guys

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-06 07:08 ID:ZeGWS0Kd

The internet is just a tool to meet people. Once you have met them, how the relationship evolves does not differ from other relationships.

>If I reveal that I may have feelings for her, what will happen?

Lot's of lovely things? But anyway, before confessing to her you should probably meet. Why don't you invite her to London, or go to Leeds? She does not necessarily need to sleep a your place, or you at hers, but you could meet in the same town. Meeting is an important step in order to cement a relationship that started on the internet, and it does not require you to confess. So just find an interesting excuse for you to meet and them meet.

3 Name: stunned : 2009-10-06 16:04 ID:UTS+AUqJ

I thought about that, but is that normal? I mean, how many people do this sort of thing? I'd feel a bit weird...
We have a shared love of the band Beirut, and they're playing in London next May, I was goin to invite her.
I just can't help but feel like a freak, though. And I don't think I'd feel comfortable in tellin friends and family we met online!

i'd rather be a starving african child. honest.

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-06 16:14 ID:ZeGWS0Kd

>I don't think I'd feel comfortable in tellin friends and family we met online! i'd rather be a starving african child. honest.

Talk about misplaced arrogance. I hope you get over your stupidity. There's nothing special about meeting on the net. First of all it's more and more common, millions are doing it, and you know what they say about flies and shit... Second, what's so better at meeting mates at school, neighborhood, work, fitness center or in a club? What exactly disturbs you when the relationship happens to start on the net?

But really, if you can't stomach something so inconsequential, then just invent a white lie, and live in shame for what it tells about your spine.

At the end of the day, if you can't pursue this relationship for that reason, you are beyond saving, and probably don't deserve the girl anyway.

5 Name: stunned : 2009-10-06 16:44 ID:UTS+AUqJ

i didn't realize it was so common, man. sorry if i offended you or something, I just didn't really know.
and as for your second point, i understood that it was far, FAR more normal to meet people person to person. I mean, I've only just started to realize that it is actually possible to fall in love with somebody because of their words alone.

but yeah i suppose you're right about me being a cunthole.

6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-06 17:35 ID:ZeGWS0Kd

>sorry if i offended you or something

What irritates me is that people will behave cowardly just for the fear of not "looking good", even when it's about their own happiness. Not to mention the lack of support that it would show to your partner.

This internet origin of the relationship is a clear example, but the principle always applies. Nobody forces to go out with a girl. So don't even dare to be ashamed of her or of having a relationship with her, even if she's some drug addict junk you found in trash of your backyard. If you are going out with her, take responsibility for that, don't be a hypocrite. There are few things as hurtful as seeing your partner being ashamed about your relationship, not to mention that it's counter productive to yourself.

Having a relationship is all about leaving your familiar venues and reaching for the other. So you'd better get used to learn and accept new things, because this sort of thing is going to happen a lot.

7 Name: D : 2009-10-06 19:53 ID:je/IWoVT

>>6

Man, seriously, you are totally right.

Mr. OP, I'm wondering if you are afraid to be called a "Nerd" because you met by internet, and that is super-geeky or some bullshit.

I mean, by the way you describe this girl, she's lovely and all. Why are you so ashamed? Go on and meet each other like to ordinary people. Maybe you'll know some other trait of her that you actually missed completly.

8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-08 01:22 ID:ohkJ8bhc

>>3

>>I don't think I'd feel comfortable in tellin friends and family we met online!

Well it's physically impossible to meet someone online. Let's just say you both go to that concert, you met there, see how that works?

You sound like an idiot

9 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-09 12:19 ID:GGJL6etZ

Internet isn't a more stupid way to meet people in any form or fashion than, say, blind dating. Seriously, it just puts you people in contact. Of course after that first contact you have to actually move things to the next level, it's keeping it to an "internet relationship" that is stupid.

We're in fucking 2009, saying "I met her on the internet" really has nothing exceptional.

10 Name: Secret Admirer : 2009-10-23 04:15 ID:WWIKUU3c

Meeting on the internet is one thing. Having a relationship that's entirely or in most part online is not healthy. You need to be with the person physically for things to work, unless youre not like most normal human beings.

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