I find the criticism of nice guys idea to be somewhat of a misrepresentation. On the one hand, identifying the label "nice guy" as a title that's shown, not self-imposed, is understandable; being a "nice guy" should reveal itself through one's conduct. However, the way that the material on this site portrays the average nice guy would both make it seem as if those who are truly kind are simply being underhanded and therefore don't deserve to "get the girl," and those who are in fact using "niceness" as a facade to get girls are somehow more reprehensible than those females who manipulate men and are cheered on for it. Conversely, those who have no regard for the feelings of women, and no respect for women, that is to say, "jerks," are seen as real men and truly genuine, because men apparently only act like sub-human neanderthals, thus any man who does not act this way is automatically trying to get into bed with a woman. Or he's gay

Allow me to elaborate. A person who is confident, directed, respectful and considerate toward women, and fairly attractive could be considered a good potential boyfriend, except he's not as interesting as someone who's on the wrong side of the law or enjoys causing pain and suffering, like, say, a jerk. As much as the nice guy has going for him, he doesn't have enough novelty for a girl to be attracted to him, and thus a girl will choose the jerk. And then, two months later, she'll come to the guy who actually cares about her well-being and tell him how she regrets having made that decision. As a person who's been in this situation, I can say that it's frustrating to hear that she's having problems like this, especially if one has offered her the chance for a healthy relationship and she turned it down

Unfortunately, no matter how many jerks the girl runs into, the nice guy will never be attractive to her, simply because...why? Given that he's directed, he has his own focus, and therefore doesn't define his life in terms of hers, since he's making sure his life is what he wants it to be. He's not a worrying loser who wouldn't have the confidence to ask her out, and he's not a self-righteous bigot who would laugh in her face at her problems that arose directly from her choosing jerks over him. He remains her friend despite the fact that she may have hurt him. Now I'm not saying that she should return the favor by getting with him, but why go for all the jerks? What's so much more attractive about them? What can the nice guy change about himself that makes him more attractive to women? He's got looks, respect, money, direction and confidence; what should he improve? By what I've read here, it seems your answer would be that he's either lying about one or many of those things, or there's something else wrong with him. However, by experience, it doesn't seem as if this is the case. Clarification on your stance would be appreciated

Why is it that women don't seem to want a healthy relationship? Bad guys give them something to fix; jerks give them something to heal. It seems as if the only way anyone can be successful with any girl is by tripping blind people at intersections, pushing old ladies off cliffs, or shooting koala bears in the face. Otherwise, they're too "nice" and therefore aren't worth anyone's time