I don't know what's going on... (4)

2 Name: Confused girl : 2014-01-17 02:33 ID:JKV0xlx4

So my birthday came rolling along a week later. He sent me a text message on my birthday, greeting me (I didn't even know he knew when my birthday was because I never told him.. I don't know if he saw it on fb or what). I think I giggled a little bit in class when I saw his message (yes I'm such a kid lol). I didn't know if he was coming to my birthday, and my other group of friends kept asking where P. was because they wanted to meet him. Unfortunately, he ended up coming past 2 because he had a work gala to attend too. When I saw him, I was so happy to see him. I think my face literally lit up. I didn't even go to my hotel that night because I ended up going back to his condo (nothing happened). That night I ended up telling him that I liked him and he said he liked me too.

Last month, I started to have problems with some of our mutual friends and I stopped hanging out with them. Before I left to go to my trip, he asked him to meet him at a pub so I went. When I saw our mutual friends there, I felt uncomfortable and wanted to leave but he convinced me to stay. We ended up leaving together to go back to his place where he became quite pushy for sex. I never had sex before so I told him I wasn't ready and he respected me. During my trip, I greeted him "Merry xmas" and he replied 30 mins later. I wanted him to greet me first for new years but he never did so I didn't bother.

I saw him last Saturday for the first time after I came back from my trip. I attended a work party with a friend, and I asked him if he was free. He told me that he was in another location (about 20-30 mins away from where I was) attending an acquaintance's birthday party. I was going to meet him at that location but he said he was too embarrassed to take me there because the location was just so bad in general. I told him it's okay, and I'll meet him there (I was quite tipsy with the red wine I drank and he knew this) but he kept insisting he will pick me up where I was at, and that he needed exercise anyways. When we met up, we went to a pub where we drank for a bit and I realized how tired he was, and told him we should go home. When we got to his place, I told him that I didn't really know much about him (I never really asked him questions about himself and we never really texted much-- like trying to get to know each other or go on dates).

I told him that we haven't gone out on an actual date and he said it's hard for him at the moment because he has been working crazy hours. He apologized for not being able to ask me out. Then I asked him, "So what are we?" (it was a question that I was asking myself for a long time) and said he didn't know. I was kind of sad when I heard of that actually but I tried not to show it. I started to ask him about his ex. He told me about his Russian ex he had for 5 months while he lived in Paris last year. I was confused with the timeline actually. I didn't know if this ex was the same ex he talked about when I first met him (the girl he dated for 4 years). I never asked him anymore questions because (1): I felt like I had no right to ask him since we aren't really going out; (2): a part of me don't really want to know. I also asked him if he was seeing someone else, and he said no.

I'm just so confused.. I don't really know what's going on. He is the first guy that I ever liked, and actually want to be with (I don't date around much either). Sometimes I feel like I initiate most of the convos but he either replies when he feels like it or replies when he remembers me. Should I wait around for him? I don't know if he is still heartbroken from his previous relationship (he never said anything else except the first night we spent together). Last night, I messaged him and he didn't reply back.

Any advices on what I should/could do?

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