I'm seriously starting to worry here.. me and my girlfriend have reached the point where we want to have sex. But I just can't get a hard-on when she's lying there! Any suggestions? This is really getting to me..
You masturbate too harshly. Get used to a softer grip.
It's all in your head, maybe try to think of kinky thoughts or something?
I think you may be right. I'm thinking I have to get a hard-on and also that I can't let her down.. especially not since I'm the one who initiates it. Just for the record, I'm a virgin, so it might also just be because I'm nervous.. just pains me to hear some of my friends not getting my problem.. at all. One of my friends went through the same thing though, but it just feels terrible still.. sigh..
It's good that you're concerned for her pleasure. You need to relax more. The next time you start thinking you're letting her down, try to think instead of all the perverted things you want to do to her. Let your imagination run wild. And FFS, don't forget the condom.
Aye, sex is more than just penis in vagina. A lot of touching, massage, kissing everywhere, oral sex, etc. would probably help you relax. Some say that their first time was awkward and not that special, but if you do a lot of the other things, it'd probably more than make up for any shortcomings (haha!)
i have a solution, S&M
Have you considered trying foreplay
If you can't get hard even from that, most likely you're either gay or impotent
Maybe you want to try anal stimulation of the prostate beforehand. It might just work.
I feel sorry for you XD
it happens to a lot of men, seriously. Its nerves.
i guess it is a big problem if u cant get a hard on, though i never been in that situation myself. cant really help much but doesnt she turn u on? even when she's nekkid? ur probably too nervous and thinking too much..relax and let the passion take over...
try chucking an email to that guy selling CAI1IS and VllAGRA and stuff that's always emailing me...
come on people, give him some serious advices. In my opinion, firstly try the foreplay. Stop thinking that you have to be so great. First time is always a big LOL, misunderstanding and finish with a promise of getting better next time. So it's not about life and dead (if you use condoms), so don't be so fucking serious about it. If you can't get hard on just looking at her try to imagine some fetish... maybe that you are doing it in some weird place like in a park or something. If it's still not working, maybe some S&M fantasies. Not working? Try to imagine your best male friend, or maybe your dad, or mom, or grandma'... I think I said too much.
thinking about your best male friend? dad? mom?? granma????
He have to find something that will turn him on...
so exactly what turns you on ? if you have something that does, than just hold on to that thought while doing it..
its a start i guess
It sounds like nerves to me. Just relax, make light of the situation...it is always better if it is playful and it makes the girl feel less self-conscious and relaxed.
It will be better for her if you fail at harding it on. Erections can make us guys greedy during sex =-P
Just put out as well as you can without your joystick and she might not even notice you didn't spill your junk on her at the end of the night X-D
You might be onto something though... if he puts out with his tongue and fingers, he might actually get so into it that he gets hard. If he really can't get it up while she's in the throes of orgasm, I'd say the problem is at least bad enough to be worth seeing a doctor.
Another thing to consider:
I know personally, I can get it up pretty quick, but I lose it equally quickly after a few minutes. You can't expect to keep it up just on physical stimulation alone. You need that mental scenario to make it real.
I used to get hard all the time. Then, when my girlfriend dumped me, two years ago, I started getting really nervous and got failed erections all the time. This led to me doubting myself even more and... Nowadays I´m not even interested in sex. I´d really like to start having a good sexlife, again. I just can´t get into the mood. It just feels so meaningless.
It's all mental, but physical excercise prior to sex boosts testosterone so try going for a jog or lifting weights, avoid heavy meals, and make sure you are in a good mood. A little alcohol (not too much) will also help a bit.
Me too, it's just that my failed erections started was when I started to have a girlfriend.
Heavy metals? I guess drinking mercury was not very safe.
On a serious note, try approaching the problem as a couple, together.
Read WTF is wrong with my dick? http://4-ch.net/love/kareha.pl/1156103719
OP, don't go immediately into having sex. Kiss your gf first, and I mean kissing as in 'sucking face'. That kind of sets the mood (I know coz I had a gf and that's what I did) plus your girl would probably love it more than just the quick slam bam. Kissing not only arouse your gf but it can also arouse yourself if done right. Then proceed to other kind of foreplay such as use your hands instead of your longjohn, my ex loved that plus the fact she's squirming around when you do that might arouse you.
i had the same problem my current gf is 3 years older than me first time i couldnt get it up, all i did was stopped drinking energy drinks and bingo i had a hardon, what i mean by what ive said is caffeine makes your nerves worse so dont touch it.
You masturbated and watched porn too much and now it's too late. Seriously all that shit, makes you feel less natural about the real thing. I bet you are a fucking ace imagening sex while spanking your monkey but when it comes down to show it's so entirely different from what you've made yourself used to, it makes you too awkward to function properly.
Look kids, a troll! A poorly informed one at that!
lol, I spent so much time practicing baseball in a cornfield...now I'm in the Big Leagues and I can't do it.
maybe if you imagine all the people in the audience are dressed up as corm