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Just a friend... (37)

1 Name: Anonymous : 2006-06-08 00:01 ID:R+JiTj5g

How can I avoid being seen as just a friend or a brother by a girl?

It has happened to me before that I like this girl and then she tells me that she loves me as just a brother. :\

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-08 01:06 ID:zlI91LVn

You're too nice. Watch anime with incest innuendo together then make your move. If it fails, become another girl's brother and try again. Rinse, repeat. It's bound to work eventually.

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-08 01:25 ID:jz+d2H8v

Girls will consider you as a friend or brother because you are simply 'nice' with them. What they want is for you to have something more than that, something they can't find in others.

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-08 22:45 ID:Heaven

>>2 lol

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-09 04:00 ID:ivQ8zT1l

You can't provide what those girls are looking for. Maybe you're shallow in your own choices.

6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-10 07:08 ID:eDYiqCJz

I am starting to think maybe >>5 is right. Maybe all this stuff about being too nice isn't really true. it's not that we're too nice, it's just we don't have whatever it is they're looking for. the two nice thing is just something we're telling ourselves to keep our egos somewhat intact. there is no law of equal trade in life. life isn't fair. maybe we're not so much too nice as just losers.

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-10 07:24 ID:Heaven

Actually, you are both. However, there are a lot of losers with girlfriends while the number of guys that are too nice with girlfriends are far fewer. True story.

8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-12 06:50 ID:IzYrckqU

Don't be friends with someone you want to be more than friends with. That's plain dishonest.

9 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-13 20:42 ID:tGJ7/K6C

Therein lies the problem of friendzone. Girls think its possible to be just friends with guys, and in their own ignorance hurt them because they think the guy thinks like them. Almost every guy on the planet seeks more than just being friends with any girl. It all comes down to a fundamental mistake both sides make: they think that the opposite sex thinks like them. A lot of it comes down to the girls playing with men's hearts without even knowing it. And there are plenty of clever ones (attention whores) who know exactly whats up, but keep playing the game for their own amusement.

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10 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-15 15:47 ID:WVU91acw

Maybe I'm special or some shit, but I have several female friends none of whom I have ever liked "that way". That doesn't prevent me from having occasionally involving them in my masturbation fantasies when my gf is out of the country working, however.

11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-15 17:55 ID:6VZBsXtN

>>10 disturbing, truly disturbing...

12 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-15 21:13 ID:Heaven

Not disturbing, I do that too. With basically all of my female friends. I don't think I'd ever lay them IRL.

13 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-15 21:48 ID:Heaven

I am like >>10 and >>12 , except for the fact that I never include any of my female friends in my masturbation fantasies.

14 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-15 23:18 ID:i0J4GYfb

>>10 A chill went up my spine when I read that.

15 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-16 18:30 ID:Z+RGw96a

>>13 same here. It is disrespectful to them even though you only use your own images of them. Plus, who's to say it won't affect the way you look at them negatively

16 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-20 07:04 ID:Heaven


I guess they'd never know anyways

17 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-22 16:14 ID:B3AP0yIO

Dude I'd love to know, I'm always ending up in the dreaded friend zone myself.

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18 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-06-22 16:36 ID:Fz0w6ksM

>are just not what women are looking for

Just like all Germans eat sausage.

19 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-07-01 11:54 ID:dzspqnuJ

can someone actually support this?
guys and girls can just be friends right? at least that's what it seems like from a girl's perpective. do guys really look for more than friendship when they befriend a girl??

20 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-07-01 14:59 ID:WsBACkE4


A guy can only be "just" friends with a girl when he doesn't find her attractive - that is at least my case. Some guys try to get friendly with a girl before they dare anything further like asking for a date or tell her that they like her etc.

21 Name: Chill-Anon : 2006-07-01 15:13 ID:FduQrYRh

>>14 sorry

22 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-07-01 17:54 ID:2+bmKo4J

>>19 I'm sure it differs from guy to guy. If the guy is particularly desperate for a relationship, that may very well be the case. Some guys will want to date a girl just because she's pretty, or sometimes just because she pays attention to him, but there are also guys who are smarter (and/or pickier) who will only date girls who are their "type." I have many female friends who I have never considered dating even though I am sexually attracted to them, because we have nothing in common and it simply wouldn't work.

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23 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-07-01 23:02 ID:7F2eGdH5

Short answer: Be an asshole.
Long answer:

24 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-07-02 05:53 ID:wAzcZGxq

ladder theory is for misogynist losers who just can't get laid

25 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-07-15 17:35 ID:ih5b8uV8

simple answer: When you go out with a girl, make it damn clear it's to go out on a date.

26 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-07-16 01:42 ID:j2DELSvz

And get her out on a date before you get to know her well; use the dating to get to know one another. If you're realising you want a serious relationship with someone and you haven't even been on a date with them yet, you're doing it wrong.

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27 Name: girl : 2006-07-16 14:27 ID:xVONXvC8

The idea that girls can't be just friends with guys is total bullshit. I have more guy friends than I have female friends and at most there are 2 who I am capable of thinking of as more than just friends. I don't even masturbate thinking about the good looking ones or anything like that.

28 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-07-16 15:20 ID:jcK4mUEF


Spoiler warning:

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29 Name: Animegirl aka Prototype Angel : 2006-07-17 18:41 ID:o9jhBs5w


If that's the case then that's bullshit. In all my life I used to have friends that are guys. And what I meant is friend that I used to know them back in grade school, jr. high, and high school. But they never got interested on being more than friends. Shit, I even have guy friends that already have a gf and they don't want to jeoperdize their relationship.
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30 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-07-17 19:55 ID:G0/A1pkJ

Here's a fun experiment to try: sometime late at night, give your guy friends a ring and say that you are unbearably horny and ask if they'll bang you. Make it clear that you are going to get the cock from somebody no matter what, even if they decline. You will find that the only ones that wouldn't say yes are either gay, too afraid of screwing up a relationship they're in, or think you're ugly. No exceptions.

31 Name: Animegirl aka Prototype Angel : 2006-07-17 21:16 ID:OKzcLnwR

lmao... That could work.

32 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-07-17 21:39 ID:dlZ6no2t

Do a Barrel Roll.

33 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-07-17 21:49 ID:dlZ6no2t

You have to learn to be strait forward with women. They like to play the games, they don't like YOU to play the games on them. You must show her exactly how you feel in a pseudo-machismo/emotional way (depending on her mood.) You need to take a gdamned risk. Girls like it when you stick your neck out on the line for them. Lay it out on the table with confidence. Find a way to gear yourself up so you can be confident. Think of the bigger picture of life, and how your life does not end no matter what the outcome.!

34 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-07-18 00:08 ID:pvfLMZXS

True story. Challenge to any girls here: Try this and report back. If you find even one exception to the rule I'll suck your cock.

35 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-07-18 08:43 ID:Heaven

I see what you did there

36 Name: Andrei : 2006-07-20 02:30 ID:L3VCWJj4

Dude, one time I was hanging out with some female friends and they asked me if I beat off while thinking about any of them. I told them honestly that I did, and they ate it up... and 2 admitted that they fapped while thinking of me before...

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37 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-07-20 03:31 ID:iUh2YsPG

The only way to avoid it is to directly tell them otherwise.

Even then they might still only think of you that way, but at least you'll know it.