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Breaking off friendships. (7)


1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2006-12-15 17:02 ID:4Uzb739W

This is a question less of IF I should break off a friendship, but rather what the best route would be.

I'm "friends" with a co-worker. We'd known/known of each other for about six months, and for about the last three months we've hung out together.

The last time we got together she has decided to inform me that hanging with me is usually 3rd or 4th on her list of possible things to do for the night (probably because I ignored all of her advances, but that's just an assumpting and 'assume makes an ass out of you and me'--points to whomever knows where that quote is from). She's also thoughtlessly rude and emasculating (she makes remarks she apparently doesn't realize are rude)--probably goes back to ignoring her come-ons. Also at her place I'd given her a Christmas gift, as I give to all of my friends (which I have mentioned but she may have forgotten). Her response was to give it back to me so I could give it to her at work and make "everybody jealous".

A close mutual friend to both of us in the office knows what's been going on since we both talk to him (though she doesn't seem to realize I talk to him). He advised what I already knew: Any friendship that is more work than fun is not worth it, and advised her when she asked what was wrong with me that he was staying out of it (as I requested and he would have done anyway). I hate sticking people in the middle, but should she decide to start rumors about me I'd want someone everyone trusts and believes (more than they do myself--I have an awesome rep at work) having my back.

I'm breaking off any kind of friendship with her, because she is just too immature and self-absorbed to GIVE a friendship in return. Yesterday I didn't bother to speak to her at all, but I did speak with all of our co-workers (and ignored her when she waved her hand in front of my face to get my attention), and at the end of the day I told her I was pissed at her and she should be able to figure out why (not my most mature moment admittedly). Her reply was "No, I can't".

So, do I continue to just ignore her? Do I tell her up front why exactly I'm pissed at her? Do I even bother to give her that damned little gift (I'd just shove it in her locker, and I already removed the To/From sticker)?

You have 2 hours to reply before I go to work, and after work I go to a Christmas bash we're both attending (if I can find the damned place). Would have posted last night, but I experienced a blackout.