Hello there everyone. Although I'm mostly a lurker, I need help now. I'm in high school and I ran into a girl I had my eye on last year. We had sort of eyed each other whenever we would see each other. I would sometimes intentionally go to the hallway where she would hang out so that I could just see her (No, I wasn't stalking her but I kind of got that feeling which is why I would do it occasionally). However, except for a moment when she gave me juice, not much happened. I was wondering if I would see her during the new school year, and luckily I did. However, I don't want the same thing to happen as last year, and would like to get to know her, and possibly date. The only problem is I have no idea how to approach her without it being weird or awkward or some random wierdo pervert.
Approach her and strike up a conversation.
Don't try to be cool or suave, just say, "Hello! How are you?" and see where it takes you. Don't go into the conversation thinking about how you'd like to date her, go in with the intent of being friends. if you go in thinking about dating her, you may come across as a pervert, or you may be paranoid, and trick yourself into thinking you seem like one.
Thank you both. I'll try my best today. I just feel a bit intimidated because she's usually with her friends, and it's a pretty big group of friends of usually at that
>>3. I wasn't really trying with the intention of dating, but I guess I wouldn't mind it going there since I've never really had a girlfriend. Lol.
If that's the case then become friends with the friends first. Once they're on your side they won't mind lending her to you for a while. :-)
If she's with a grup of friends, don't worry about it. If being around so many people makes you nervous, then try and pull her away, otherwise greet her and maybe even try and join in the conversation!
Tell us how it goes, too!
She gave you juice???
Wow. More people actually responded. I'll take all your advice to heart. I wasn't able to see her today because I had to do something else. I just saw her while I was going to my friend's class, I would have said something to her, but she was talking to some guy. I think she saw me though.
>>5 I was going to do that as I would have no problem talking to a girl(s) I don't like, but I was paranoid and tell them "Some wierdo was asking about you." Then if I did go up to her they'd be like "That's him."But I'm over that. Somewhat. Really doubt people would be that mean.
Actually it sounds like you have the same condition as me. I'm not shy around guys and not shy around girls I don't want. But throw one girl I do want into the group and I'm silent as a rock.
Yeah... same here. It's one of these things where the harder you try, the harder it gets to do the simplest things, like call them. -_-
I think you really need to be able to relax in this sort of situation, which is probably why being drunk helps. Not that I recommend getting drunk to attempt to attract girls.
Also keep in mind you start with heavy malus points. Even if she likes you, the fact you've waited so long to move on will weight in the balance when she'll have to judge you as "datable". That "nice but kind of creepy" factor.
I was sort of able to talk to her today. But it was a bit awkward. My friends sort of got into it and one of them knew one of the people she was with. Unfortunately, he told her friend that I liked her. Well in any event, I was able to see her and talk to her. At first it felt as though I had FAILED, because she told them that my friend, can't tell which, liked her. However, in retrospect it isn't that bad because I "KNOW" her now, but was only able to say "Hello." Unlike what some people said the rest didn't come naturally. But there's always tomorrow , if I see her.
>>9 I have it that way too, and I am a girl. It's not that i don't make the moves and wait for the guys to make, I'm simply way too shy to be able to approach someone i really like. Be it love, of friendship.
No, it's perfectly alright. I didn't really have my hopes to high anyway but was just really curious about it. Not much happened on Friday, we just saw each other and said waved. I'm going to see where it goes, but not really going to try. Going to keep posting if anything new arises.
>>13 I'm not sure if her friends have told her and they didn't come off as the kind to tell her and they thought it was one of two of my friends. I think they,her friends, thought it was the friend to my right, and even if they told her, she most likely thought it was my friend to the right. Thanks for the good luck.
>>14 >No, it's perfectly alright. I didn't really have my hopes to high anyway but was just really curious about it. Not like I want to give up though.
This was meant for 14
Why did she give you juice? Sounds cute, but a bit odd, giving juice to randoms.
Anyway. It's hard to gauge how/when you should approach a girl until you actually get to know her. Most girls, as >>13 said, like the moment of mystery surrounding the status of the relationship. It's sweet, fun, and as much as I hate to admit, we girls do like the thrill of the chase. When girls find out that a guy they've recently met likes them, the ball in their court, which leaves you on the back-foot. Many a times (not all), this situation has produced toy-boys. Hence I suggest subtle hints, a smile here and there to charm her and see if she responds favourably. Don't overtly suggest anything to her, just tease her with a compliment here and there, ask about her interests etc.
>>17 I'm not sure as to why she gave me juice. I was just walking along the hallway that she is usually in(I wanted to see her), and while I was along, and she was eating lunch, and I think she said something like "Oh, i don't this juice or something"(not sure at all, happened a while ago) and when I was close to her she said if I wanted it and I'm like "Who me?" and she said "Yea." Then I think I said, "You didn't do anything to it right?" and she said no so I'm like ok and just took it. Memory is a bit fuzzy and not even like 50% sure about the conversation, but it was something like that, I think. Well, hopefully the ball is still in my court, or I would slightly prefer our court, cause if it's up to me I feel like a jerk. I'm not sure if I overly suggest, just the occasional tease, jokes, some compliments maybe. However I think I usually spend too much time with them(girls I like) and I end up stuck in the friend zone. Well, I'm going to see her tomorrow, if all goes well, and hopefully something happens. Wish me luck everyone.
I don't really have much to add, but I honestly wish you tons of luck. Do it for all the shut-ins on 4-ch too cowardly to approach people.
I know a person who was like you and liked a girl in the school. The best solution that would work is to get a friend who knows her (Or any other connections) to introduce you to her. And it worked, so you can try that option.
Anyways best of the luck- Kira
Well, not much happened today. Considering I see her less than 30 minutes a day may be due to that but oh well. In any event, we exchanged hello's, like twice or so, and I even got a kiss from her. Sure it was on the cheek, but for a girlfriend-less loser like me that's unbelievable. It would take me months or in a case a couple of years for that to happen, and I don't even really know her. Go ahead, say she might have just been being nice. I don't care. (I feel cocky know so I'll stop, and also feel to have betrayed my fellow love impaired companions.)
>I even got a kiss from her..
Unless she's a slutty girl, I'd say you've hit the jackpot my friend.
I once got juice from a girl ... and also a kiss... Now I have Cancer?! Can someone tell me where I went wrong?!?!?!?!?
Saw her again today. Just talked to her about her name, because I was saying it wrong, and said I could call her by her real name or a nickname[I was calling her by a different name that sounded awfully similar(this happened with another girl I liked too.)], and about an animal cruelty sticker she had.. Progress is small but seems to be okay. Actually the progress seems so small, I feel like posting a bit less, until I have super good news, but I'm addicted I guess.
It says "kita!"
And keep reporting back here!
Like I mentioned earlier not much has happened. Things seem/feel like they're progressing, but at such a small rate that it seems better to reply every once in a while.
>>26 Like I mentioned earlier, I don't have my hopes that high, but I guess high enough to expect something. I probably won't be heart-broken if this doesn't work out, but then again that doesn't mean I shouldn't try. It's dumb to not try because if you do at least you feel you have done something. Like they say, better to have loved and lost to have never loved at all, though I guess here you would replace love with tried.
After realising that she kissed you as a form of greeting, I have to take back my words.
Do NOT expect much from a girl like her. Kissing a near random guy, what the hell? In my time, all the slutty girls used to feel it necessary to hug random guys before class, but this is something new.
You have to stage something. Get some bully to go up an threaten her. Then come to her rescue. The bully will flatten you, and she'll be impressed by his Alpha-male status and go off with him. On second thoughts, you better play the bully.
That's retarded. I used to think of doing things like that
when I was like 12.
That was just some good old trollin I'm sure, lol
Hello there everyone. Sorry I haven't replied in a while. I was going to reply yesterday, but I felt guilty about writing all of this(the tread) without her knowledge, but I owe it to you guys to know how things are going. Well on Friday bumped into her a lot, not literally though. There was a pep rally that day, for those who don't know like a school celebration filled with school spirit and the weird type of people who have it. Anyway in turns out that she was going to be in it since she's part of the band. She said she wanted to see me there and to dance. I said sure, even though I hate being at those stupid things and can't dance to save my life. However I remembered I leave school early and I wouldn't be able to go. So after wondering what to do, choices were sneak back into school, have my "identical" friend dance in my place or tell her I couldn't go. So I decided to tell her. Before I said anything she said that we always seem to be bumping into each other. I said yea that we do and it's kinda funny how often it happens. So I ended up telling her I couldn't go. She seemed a bit disappointed so I told her that maybe I could sneak back into school and be able to go. She said that it's alright that she didn't want to get people into trouble because of her. During our conversation though someone came up to her, someone I know of a bit, and seemed to want a hug from her but she pushed him away and seemed uncomfortable , which I found weird since the day before I saw her go up to him and hug him. So then the bell rang and she had to leave so we hugged goodbye and we kissed each other and the cheek. After leaving I was wondering whether I should go back, but my friends suggested that I shouldn't and I sort of came to the realization that going back probably wouldn't do much as only seems to happen in movies and stuff.
Wow. My post was so long. So I'm going to respond to everyone here.
>>29 I'm not really a near random guy. She didn't kiss me on the cheek from the get-go. It was a bit after we started talking to each other so I don't see how she can be a slut just because of that.
>>30 Lol. That will never work. Funny none the less.