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Help dealing with relationship fear. (4)


1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-01 07:44 ID:Bls6ieae

I'm sure a lot of people understand what it's like to fear commitment, but that's not exactly the case with me. :/

My last relationship was for about a year and a half. He was controlling to a point where he had an issue with every friend I'd ever had. Jealous, even, of people I had previous crushes on (long before I'd met him). I lost a lot of friends, and kept the ones closest to me a secret from him. He'd pick fights with me about small things, and blame me for everything else. Numerous times he called me an idiot, a bitch, and generally made me feel useless.

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2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-02 10:26 ID:WnZQQoXX

Well,...

Your case is pretty common, and solutions are well known. First of all, the kind of abusive relationship you experience happens, but not all men are like that. You did the only thing one has to do in those cases, dump the guy. A more experienced woman would have done it much earlier, and avoided most of the damage. But that's how you get experienced.

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3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-02 16:36 ID:GytpBaPQ

>>2 is right.

and if this guy really is as good as you make him seem- you really should work hard in overcoming that fear and starting something with him.

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4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-02 22:58 ID:Bls6ieae

>>2 Thanks for the advice. I've been trying to be more open, but it's a slow thing and is taking more time than I'd hoped. But things are getting easier, gradually.

>>3 I worded that incorrectly. I've known him for a long time, but we stopped talking for about the entire time I was with my ex. The feelings are more recent.