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Missing the Feeling of Love (19)

1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-06 07:03 ID:R5IkYLha

Sometimes I feel like my girlfriend doesn't love me.

There has not been a major change in the way she acts toward me. She's been reserved from the beginning. I thought as time went on she would open up to me. But we have dated for six months, and she has not changed.

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2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-06 07:32 ID:UvRYkUVf

havve another talk with her.
or dump her.

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-06 12:35 ID:T/K3x2gt

Is this specific to you, or is she like that in general?

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-06 20:09 ID:R5IkYLha

She's like that in general. In fact, even more so. She's shy around strangers, so I love the way she brightens and her eyes sparkle when she's around me.

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5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-06 23:53 ID:OJ5hzZ1k

she fucking loves you, you moron.

6 Name: Frigid Onanoko : 2007-12-07 01:34 ID:84titVGE

demanding more love not very succesful no matter how tactful you ask. Anyway, what you guys do together to have fun or learn new stuff?

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-07 02:02 ID:lQKaKXID

I know, I know. I'm an idiot.
The problem here is that I'm always the one that has to take action. That is, kissing her, coming up with things for us to do, starting conversations, keeping conversations alive, etc. Although I somehow manage to find new stuff for us to do often, without her help it's difficult and tiring.

8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-07 06:41 ID:Xh26MvTz

Actions speak louder than words.

9 Name: lil' fox : 2007-12-07 07:20 ID:uLffa/TZ

Man, if you love her you sould notice she need you... A person that don't talks much and don't take the iniciative to do any generally has a dark past. It's simple: you takes iniciative when you knows your doing is well, if you think you'll never succes, then you don't. So, if she is true when she tall she loves you, then she have something that wants to hide from you.

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10 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-07 08:52 ID:GhCP1Zjv

Sounds like she's already working plenty hard just to go out of her shell and be with you. I'm sure this is something you already know, but being in love doesn't mean the other party is going to act towards you in exactly the way you want.

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11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-07 14:58 ID:T/K3x2gt

I think you are missing an important point,... The goal should not be to get her to be more demonstrative to you in particular, but help her feel more comfortable with people in general.

If she's more sociable and self-confident, you will also benefit

12 Name: lil' fox : 2007-12-07 17:50 ID:uLffa/TZ

>>11 I agree

13 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-08 06:50 ID:NwzwZiRF

I already knew about her 'dark past' from the beginning. She went through two relationships in the past which were rocky, short, and ended badly. She has even admitted to me that one of the main reasons she's so closed, even to me, is that she doesn't want to get hurt again. I keep trying to tell her it's safe to open up. I try to hint that her lack of displayed emotion toward me is taking its toll and that I'm starting to get discouraged. But it just doesn't help. Sometimes I just feel like yelling at her, "I've risked so much of myself for this relationship, the least you could do is reciprocate! I know you don't want to get hurt, but neither do I and that's just something we have to risk for this relationship, we just have to trust each other!"

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14 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-09 02:46 ID:HO5dYsO6

>>I'm 18, my emotions shouldn't fluctuate like a puberty-stricken teenager so much.

yeah, they should. and a warning: it probably isn't going to stop anytime soon.

15 Name: lil' fox : 2007-12-09 03:08 ID:+GiyjH3Q

Sometimes what you need is do nothing. Just wait till the time comes. I mean, I can't think she isn't trying to open the knot. The point it takes time. Maybe the help she needs is you being by her side. Don't really know. I allways give time to the people.

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16 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-11 16:02 ID:lQKaKXID

I don't know. Time sounds good. I don't want to lose her.

17 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-11 18:29 ID:ugmQR7M9

how did you meet her OP? was she in a relationship when you first met her?

18 Name: Secret Admirer : 2007-12-11 19:15 ID:1xrPzVrc

We were classmates for a while before I started showing interest. When we became friends she wasn't in a relationship. Then friendship rapidly turned into dating and sex.

19 Name: lil' fox : 2007-12-12 03:09 ID:1XJGimUF


Then, for sure you loves her. Make sure she knows it. I mean, not just repeting constantly, but being her support. You know, sooner or later she'll get aware she can trust you. And (this is important) ask her things, ask her opinion. Even if she responses "mhm" and nothing more. I mean, she alredy counts on your life, so let her know it.

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