I have had a very steady relationship for about two years now, and nothing has really come between myself (female) and my boyfriend (except for some religious issues). About halfway into our relationship, I came out of the closet as a bisexual after a long period of denial. My boyfriend was OK with that. I still am uncomfortable with having sexual attractions to females, though.
I believe you should let them know depending on how serious you are about it. Are you actually planning to save money and pay the surgery or take a hormonal treatment?
if you were my gf i would definitely convince you to have a threesome (mff)
From your post it's difficult to assay how far are you in your gender change path,...
If basically you have done nothing except thinking about it, I believe the best is to start reading some books about people who went through the same thing. This will show you which mistakes to avoid, but also help you in better formulating your feelings and needs.
You should certainly tell your boyfriend how you feel, but I'd wait to tell the family. As the relationship with your boyfriend has lasted so long, hopefully he'll accept it. The first thing you need to do is to try dressing as a male and going into public. This is what a doctor will tell you to do before starting hormones, and then surgery.
If you read her post carefully, she does not say that certain hobbies have to fit a specific gender or sexual orientation, but that that by doing them she feels questioned about her identity,...
>>6 Dressing as the opposite gender in public is the first step to identifying if you'd like to go through with the surgery, in the order that many doctors do it. You crossdress in public for so many months, and then they allow you to begin hormones, and then after so many months of that, you get the surgery. I wasn't just randomly saying "LAWL U DRESS LIEK GUY N THEN U BE GOOD KK?" you know. They do it that way so that a person doesn't get a sex change on a whim or due to mental illness or anything similar.
Just because there's a lot of emphasis on switching genders entirely in our liberal culture doesn't mean it's your only solution. Have you tried crossdressing, to start? You don't need to make such a big leap, try various things to make yourself more comfortable.
Don't worry, I understand and agree with what you say, I just found funny the contradiction between hobbies and clothing, although I understand the reasons behind it.
What are you thinking? Your personality isn't restricted by your physical appearance??? What nonesense! Your body is as much a part of you as your personality. If you want to change something, you could as well change your personality, but that would also be wrong, right?