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When feelings fade/change (7)

1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-03-14 17:27 ID:z+ZOmvgz

how do you deal with it when the initial 'honeymoon' period ends and the rush of being in love kinda dies down? in its place, arguments start, and differences in mentality and values come to the fore.

I'm in my first relationship so I'm clueless. I keep hearing that this is part and parcel of being in a relationship and can be dealt with...but how?

2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-03-14 18:22 ID:C5aXyAUi

Delusional: yes can be dealt with, fake it

Truth: Everything ends

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-03-14 21:22 ID:26MobtSv

Relationships change, that is inevitable, because people themselves change. Those that don't change die.

Your relationship reached a crisis point. If you fail to adress the crisis, it will fail. But if you manage to solve it, it will strive, because it will have become deeper. Probably the current crisis is due to the fact that both of you are behaving more naturally than before, and each one of you is having trouble coming to grips with the newly apparent aspects of the other,... The key to solve this is to get to know and accept the other, while making compromises on certain aspects of your relationship. You also have to learn to deal with conflicts whithout ending in violent arguments.

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4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-03-15 17:09 ID:yrT/KXy5


wow thanks. that was a really insightful post. OP here btw.

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5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-03-16 09:53 ID:FxqTMyXO

Lack of communication is a common source of problems, because like you said, it allows conflicts to get worse before being able to adress them,...

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6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-03-16 16:54 ID:5M8XWf8F


yeah we did hrash things out somewhat.

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7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-03-17 11:58 ID:EwVXQMwH

Don't worry. It's not bad to have problems, it's bad not to address them,...

Spend some quality time with her: do pleasurable things with her (not just sex). The good times with hermust be more common than the bad times.