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I want to confess already (28)

1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-02 23:16 ID:zE8rKFHA

I've never really liked anyone before, so I sort of tried to brush it off several times whenever my heart jumped when he touched me or put his head on my shoulder (!) or whatever. I know how easy it is to mistake things like that for attraction, especially when you're in school and all this other stuff is flying around.

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2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-02 23:22 ID:50j/iyAi

If you don't tell him, someone else [aka those two girls] may tell him, and then your chance may be gone forever. Go ask him on a date, maybe he'll even say yes. The worst that can happen is rejection, and if that does happen at least you'll know.

3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-02 23:30 ID:LqzZtIxW

And if you don't you will regret it.

4 Name: soccerfuu9 : 2008-05-03 01:01 ID:pNByLoED

if you rather have dreams...THEN DON'T CONFESS! It's better for you to say how you feel, rather than thinking "what might happen" and it never occurs.

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-03 01:41 ID:LqzZtIxW

Also, it might hinder you, preventing you to move on, and you might miss other opportunities, without even noticing. Or noticing too late...

6 Name: Thunder!3GqYIJ3Obs : 2008-05-03 01:50 ID:JWFLHf73

I don't think the question here is should you, but rather, how do you?

7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-03 01:52 ID:80yl4Vq6

Confessing is generally a bad idea for either gender. It puts the other person on the spot. The person you confess to will often pull the "I like you too but not that way" excuse.

Here's what you do instead: Set up a small quick date between just the two of you. Something like lunch together. Just the two of you. Keep the conversation light and positive, and afterwards, tell him that you enjoy spending time alone with him (that's all) If he doesn't ask you out, try another small date, and tell him you had fun again, and this time, also say it would be fun if the two of you could do it more often, and in different places. If he STILL doesn't ask you out (he might be a little thick) , you can either go in for the kill yourself and ask him out on a date (ONLY ASK FOR A DATE, DON'T CONFESS) or brush him off, because he probably doesn't want to date you.

8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-03 02:09 ID:LqzZtIxW

She has a point.


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9 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-03 03:15 ID:zE8rKFHA

OP here.

Well, I was just thinking that I would say it casually, like it was nothing big (because hopefully it really isn't). Since he's really thick anyway, on the off-chance that he does believe me and still shows no sign of reciprocation, I could laugh, brush it off, and change the subject to Grand Theft Auto 4. Hopefully he wouldn't feel bad, and he has plenty to talk about afterwards.

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10 Name: soccerfuu9 : 2008-05-03 06:07 ID:pNByLoED

JUST BE FRIENDS WITH HIM FIRST! I'm sorry, but to start a have to start a friendship first. What happened to the words "You're my best friend" in wedding vows?

11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-04 13:19 ID:Heaven

I have never heard those words in wedding vows.

12 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-04 19:34 ID:zE8rKFHA


Well, I'm already really good friends with him...

13 Name: soccerfuu9 : 2008-05-04 23:23 ID:WToeffxS

>>12 that's not I received it from >>1.

Anyways...just talking to him is a good start. However...U REALLY need him to get off is comfort zone if you want to progress such a friendship. I's nice that you are adapting to his liking...but what about him to you? Isn't it kind of unfair that you only care about what he's into...and not you? Trust me...I went through this with my girlfriend when we were first friends. We talked about what I LIKED...but eventually she didn't want to talk for a while. She later explained that it was about "ME, ME, ME" and not about her. So...I had to pay a little bit more attention to her...and it worked out well...the same with other friendships I have with girls.

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14 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-05 03:50 ID:5q0xk4YQ

I feel like we put too much emphasis on confessing and forget who we are confessing to. I feel like if you are mature and 'confess' in the right way, then you don't have to worry about the other person freaking out. Remember OP, he is your friend, and if he is a true friend he will be there to help you out, despite your problems.

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15 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-05 22:01 ID:zE8rKFHA

OP here. >>14, I was planning on doing something like that, although it sounds a little corny, haha, but something happened.


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16 Name: soccerfuu9 : 2008-05-06 02:50 ID:WToeffxS

>>15 I wanna know how he knew that he likes you...

anyways...being depressed means that 1) you feel rejected and 2) you aren't doin' anything to win him over. Now that I see it...I would go for this: go for broke! At this point...the gig is up. He knows you like him...and either he likes/dislikes you, but is embarrassed to say it. Therefore...just pull him out one day and tell him. It will only hurt more if you prolong the situation.

17 Name: Thunder!rHSj9FAROc!!A7wL4071 : 2008-05-06 03:04 ID:JWFLHf73

>>15 when I first confessed to my best friend, it was because he found out from my other friends telling him. we took a walk and I told him, "I guess you know what this is about, huh?" He made a affirmative noise and I said, "Yeah..I like you..."

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18 Name: soccerfuu9 : 2008-05-06 20:52 ID:WToeffxS

>>17 are you like my long lost sister?

19 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-06 21:34 ID:MheFPYQq


>you really have nothing to lose. if he knows, all you have left to do is find out his reaction. GO FOR IT!
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20 Name: Korra : 2008-05-06 23:56 ID:oxCFweRh

Miss OP, I would like to express my must truthfully feelings about your situation. This is a matter of bravery, you will need lots of that to take on the next step.

>>17 I do really, really agree with Thunder. Go for it! We will be pending on you. You touched our hearts here, we hope you the best of luck.
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21 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-07 00:31 ID:zE8rKFHA

OP here.

Haha, I haven't actually said anything yet. I'm already really embarrassed so I can't bring myself to say it out loud. I already have enough trouble admitting that I have a crush at all.

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22 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-07 00:33 ID:zE8rKFHA

I wish they could edit posts, but they can't, so I have to resort to double posting.

I just want to add that you guys are really awesome for the support, especially when all I want to do is hit myself with a book, a cellphone, and a shoe several times on the head. Thank you guys, sincerely.

23 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-07 01:18 ID:gauSVCUg

>>21, >>22: i know tests are in your scope right now...but also...confess IN PERSON!! having your friend isn't going to do you any good. better get on that rocket soon miss...

24 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-08 21:21 ID:Fy3E/o5C

Just tell him. Chances are more than likely at least some of your stress will go away. And besides, he either likes you back or if he doesn't, you might become better friends. You don't really have much to lose. Talking to him about it could show you're brave, and in the end, you will most likely gain some courage.

25 Name: Korra : 2008-05-09 20:23 ID:oxCFweRh

I must be honest here, I was in a situation alike this one, that's why I would like to help miss OP. I had a crush with a friend, and I really wished to tell her that I liked her. She was really beautifull, smart and cute. And I used to be chubby and clumsy at that time, so I had 0% chance to make her my Girlfriend. I acted stalkerly with her, but I never confessed. 6 years of crush made me think of how stupid I was, and finally confessed. She told me I was late, too late. If I would confess earlier she would be my girlfriend, but I acted as an idiot. I never forgived myself because of that. And I wish that miss OP wouldn't either.

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26 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-09 20:48 ID:bQ1zgQ2r

>>25 if you stalked this girl for six old are you now?

27 Name: Korra : 2008-05-09 22:35 ID:oxCFweRh

I'm 20 now, I was a kid in Primary School at that time. Anyway, let's go back to the main topic, shall we?

28 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-05-11 02:07 ID:0fIWmgew

I hope everything goes well for you =D

Like everyone else said, be honest with him, none of that beating around the bush stuff.

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