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Indecisive and Confused (10)

1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-22 19:24 ID:RQAVc+GH

OK, so here's the problem: I seem to have become infatuated with three females, and have no clue whatsoever how they feel about me, and also can't figure out which one I should pursue, and what to do to gain/hold their attention. I've kind of narrowed it down to two at the moment, because the other has been in a two year relationship and is semi-engaged (that's the killer).

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2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-22 19:24 ID:RQAVc+GH

On either Wednesday or Thursday, she broke up with her boyfriend, and I'm afraid I'm partially to blame, because he doesn't seem as open-minded as us, and she probably told him. She was feeling really down and asked me to call her later. However, later she got online and she was fine, and I asked her if she still wanted me to call her, and she said “dunno”, which I interpreted as “no”. So I left her alone. Anyway, last night (this morning), I was up really late trying to reverse engineer some proprietary software (I failed, by the way), and at around 2:30, she logs in and tells me that she just got back from wherever she was and she made out with her best guy friend. Ordinarily, I'd be pretty cool with that, that's great, who gives a fuck. But this was right after I'd told her I'd give her my first, and she just took this guy's first, and I'm like “lolwut”. But even then, I was just slightly jealous, because I know it's gonna be at least a year until I bother to get my license, and so it will be at least a year until I can be with her until two in the morning. But I make just a slightly sarcastic jealous clingy comment (stupid me, stupid me), and she gets quite apologetic, which makes me feel even worse, because I hate it when people apologize. But then, after apologizing, she went on to say “it would've been more if it were just you.” and I start feeling better... But then she adds “probably because you're not shy like him” </3... And then she goes on to tell me how they were both friends but after a while they developed crushes on each other even though they were both dating other people, so they didn't tell each other for a long time, but these days they're more than just friends. Then she goes on about how shy he is, and how I'm not shy, so I tell her how I am with girl 1, who I've never discussed anything sexual with. She tells me that's because I really like Girl 1, but I'm only attracted to her, and then she says that that's how most of her relationships have been. I tell her that that's not the case at all, and I think we sit silent for a while and have a short discussion about the new redtube uploads. Then more silence, then she goes to bed.

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3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-22 21:03 ID:a6EtMvyt

Whatever happened to girl 3?

4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-22 21:34 ID:RQAVc+GH

>>3 She's semi-engaged, so.... Whatever. Also, she's my best friend, and I don't want to ruin that. And when we met, she had a crush on me, and I told her I didn't like her, cuz it took me over a year to realize how awesome she is.

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-22 22:01 ID:l54GMtvX

The fact that she is semi-engaged is a really good reason not to pursue her.


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6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-26 21:23 ID:4qHKqVIF

Well, I guess there's not really much advice in my case, but I'm still hoping, so here's an update:

Girl two and I got into a huge argument about Densha Otoko (or rather, she got angry at me and I had to apologize for something I didn't really feel I should be apologizing for), and we didn't speak for a few days. We made up after that, though. However, during our argument, she came out with all of this emo shit about nobody understanding her or knowing her, and how I don't know a thing about her, etc. Which, imho, is total bullshit. Personally, I believe that the majority of what you show others and what you do is who you are, like it or not. I mean, sure, I was a closet otaku for a few years, but it's not like I didn't watch anime. It's not like I was sitting there, liking anime, but not watching it for whatever reason. But whatever.

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7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-26 23:24 ID:1W0Ndqj8

Hmmm... that was a lot. Well I guess my reply is going to be long. I say go for the Girl2. Because quite simply, you've wrote like five paragraphs about her. ^_^

Lol dude some of that stuff you wrote had me laughing. "We both watch epic amounts of porn." "Hang out at Hot Topic" (Hot Topic isn't cool in S. California) But that porn thing, lol epic huh?

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8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-28 05:16 ID:g/12mTck

Yeah, in Chicago, Hot Topic isn't really cool either, but because our schools are so big popularity doesn't matter, because everyone is split into huge groups and then sub-groups, rather than popular/unpopular and then sub-groups within. It's more of a goth/emo store, and it just so happens that the coolest anime geeks have are also emo... I'm more of a hippie myself, but w/e.

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9 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-06-29 22:01 ID:80C2Uiyj

End the friendship. Girls and guys can't be true friends. You have to.

10 Name: Akina : 2008-06-30 06:16 ID:Q+7OZtMS

Girl 2 sounds like she is really dense and emotionally insensitive. Have you ever told her outright how you feel about her? Not just "Do you feel the same way I feel about you?" But like "I have feelings for you" Or somewhere else along the lines. She probably doesn't know how deep your feelings run for her.