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Ending Year-long Live-in Relationship (20)

1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-09 15:00 ID:NiJbsPZh

I'm just getting out of a wonderful relationship, the first long relationship I've ever had. We were together for almost a year and a half, living in the same apartment. I've been having a lot of trouble coping with the breakup, very much because I didn't have or didn't notice that we were having trouble and that she wanted to leave me. To me, it was like one day she loves me, the next she tells me she doesn't love me anymore. She told me that I didn't pay enough attention to her, and I do realize that is probably the case, but I feel betrayed since she never talked to me. She only talked to her friends.

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2 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-09 17:47 ID:V2A+xbKx

> To me, it was like one day she loves me, the next she tells me she doesn't love me anymore.

She picked the other guy over you, then broke up with you to be with him. Chances are she was doing him behind your back. Of course she didn't tell you that she was attracted to someone else beforehand.

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3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-10 05:45 ID:NiJbsPZh

I know she didn't cheat on me, but I do know she really wanted to see other people by that point. She just felt trapped by us living together, her money problems, etc etc.

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4 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-10 06:21 ID:gcmKiXV6

go clubbing man, even if you dont like dancing and shit you can still pick up some chick there. just dress to impress and act cool. plus, i fyou like dancing then that's just a plus xD

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-10 17:30 ID:aD+H/VPv

> I let my social life dwindle and I don't know fucking anyone anymore

I suppose this is proof that us guys are dumb as bricks compared to women. This is a typical story. In fact, it's the norm.

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6 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-13 00:32 ID:NiJbsPZh

I think my best bet is student organizations/activism groups. Smart and/or politically-active chicks FTW. I can't see myself being comfortable at a dance club, really.

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7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-15 06:53 ID:g2KMnTDg

>>5 Eh, I tend to date guys who become my best friends, and who have really cool friends, too. Add this to my preference to dealing with guys instead of other women (read: I have a low tolerance for dramatic bullshit) and I have a tendency to get screwed on the social scene after a break-up.

8 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-15 13:54 ID:bWtk0Cby

Urgh. I'm a guy, but I'm kinda facing the same problem. The girl became a core member of my circle of friends, who are all basically awesome.

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9 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-17 07:48 ID:p2/TYe78


Look, you need to get over this bitch. Talking from the objective point of view, this girl stopped liking you a long time before she told you. And this other guy, I am telling you she has been doing him way before he moved in. So there is no need to stick around if the girl does not like you, which is the sad truth:

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10 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-17 14:45 ID:Heaven

> Seriously what type of girl lives with another guy in the same apartment in the room next to him immediately right after they break up?

My ex-wife, for one.

11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-17 18:22 ID:p2/TYe78


And we called those type of girls whores.

12 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-17 22:28 ID:Heaven

Seriously I DO WANT to kill those whores!!! They are so annoying!

13 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-18 05:06 ID:NiJbsPZh

I've pretty much decided to stay barring some unforeseen circumstance.

>You need to get away from her and you especially need to get away from them, because once you her the bed rocking and her muffled screams through the wall you will want to kill yourself.
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14 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-19 02:40 ID:p2/TYe78

Why are you staying? Please give me a reason why. Because from my perspective there is no reason to.

15 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-19 05:36 ID:ghQQgqAJ

Wait wait wait wait wait, you're only "not sure" if you'd take her back?

You should be ashamed of yourself for being such an unrepentant pussy. She doesn't want you. She doesn't like you. Kick her ass to the curb or get out yourself. Either is better than whatever the hell you think you're doing right now.

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16 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-20 23:52 ID:NiJbsPZh

Flaming doesn't convince most people of anything, but hearing it like that is somehow convincing me. While I still haven't decided yet, I'm checking out places that need a tenant. I only have so much time before next semester starts.

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17 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-22 23:25 ID:NiJbsPZh

So as it turns out I managed to find a place that's substantially better-located at the same price, sans ex-gf. Whenever the fucker emails me back I can start working out plans.

18 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-23 06:51 ID:NiJbsPZh

Told my ex that I was going to move out, and why. The ensuing conversation was truly enlightening, to say the least.

The reason she was with me was because she was so excited to have found someone who actually loved her; it was only later that she realized what a serious relationship entailed (I being her first boyfriend), and essentially she didn't know how to deal with the situation. She didn't love me, but she wanted to.

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19 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-23 12:32 ID:Heaven

Glad you can find some positivity in your situation. Good luck on your new home/life!

20 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-07-24 06:53 ID:ghQQgqAJ

Whatever, dude. Do yourself a favor and don't stay friends with her. Speaking from experience here.

Also speaking from experience: trust me, you'll know when you find a girl who actually likes you. And go figure, you'll probably end up doing to her what your ex-"girlfriend" did to you.

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