At work I have a lover, we have known each other since primary school, have been in love multiple times, have gone out, broke up, then again and again, now we just really know each other and make love sometimes
Do you want to show her she's the first and most important person to you? Maybe you should consider dating your lover, y'know exclusively and not as some secret casual affair.
Have a fresh start, date as if you never dated her before, ask her out on a date to some restaurant you both haven't been to, get to know her again. Be serious about it, no cheating, no keeping it secret, no lies, do all the sappy romantic stuff like picnics, flowers, handholding, walks on the beach, dinners at restaurants just be a regular couple.
Maybe it's time to find out how deep the bond between you and your secret lover is.
I have dated her, we got along really well.
I want kids and she doesn't; and so we decided to remain secret lovers while (or even after) we each find someone else.
ah the children thing, that is one of the many things that break up couples and it's pretty sad. Being someone who doesn't want kids (i never wanted Jesus, he was an accident) i feel for her because finding someone who doesn't want kids is very hard to find and many times looked down upon.
Yeah, you should be allowed to have children, and she should be allowed not to have children. But that's something you and a life partner have to be in agreement on for it to work. It's quite a shame, but that's the way life can be.
Alright, so this is a different topic but what could possibly a reason for a woman not to want children?
It's probably something shameful or embarassing if she can't tell me, because otherwise we can talk about ANYTHING
Some girls just don't want kids. It doesn't have to be anything "shameful or embarassing".
Kids are problematic, you have to feed them, clean them, you have to love them. And they are expensive. And for a professional woman they do quite a lot of damage on a career. Statistically speaking business women go a lot further when they remain without kids. You should want to have kids, not have kids to conform to the norm. The fact that she is not having kids that she doesn't want is commendable.
>>9 Maybe she cannot have children like she's infertile or has genes she doesn't want to pass on. Maybe she doesn't think she would be a good mother or doesn't like kids, doesn't want kids with you, scared of giving birth, doesn't want to become a housewife or something like that, or is more career orientated.
it's probably something simple like she doesn't want to have kids but let me ask you something if she loves you so much why does she want you two to be a secret. she has no right to get jealous or think that she's the most important if she doesn't want to be out in the open about being with you