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How Should I be Taking this? (11)

1 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-08-28 05:11 ID:wF3c0yMf

Alright, I've just been told by my friend that she likes me, a lot more than I thought she did. I've also liked this same friend for a while now. She's confused about the whole thing though. She's not sure if she wants to date me, because she's had a bad relationship before, and when it ended, her and the other guy couldn't really be friends anymore, because everything just wasn't "right", and she doesn't want our friendship to end up the same way.

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2 Name: bingo : 2008-08-28 06:44 ID:M8J/FA4T

There are things out there called "deal breakers". The concept is that there are some things that people will not accept in a relationship no matter what. It is different for different people. For example, I will not accept anyone that has a negative disposition in life. Even though I'm not necessarily positive, I would rather be single then be with someone that is pessimistic. For someone else they may not date someone who has a child, or may not date someone from a certain religion.

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3 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-08-29 17:05 ID:pjesihbM

i have one question for you
with her doing the things she does, does that change who she is?

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4 Name: Akina : 2008-08-30 05:08 ID:YqhWLeN4

Get over it. With the percentage of people who smoke weed on the rise, it's becoming a socially acceptable thing. Just like how underage drinking is accepted socially but is still not legal. You don't want to ruin a relationship because of this. Relationships are not supposed to be perfect. Both parties have to work on it, and it's these difficulties where your bond grows stronger. The more difficulties you both go through together the better the relationship will end up, for a relationship isn't measured by how much love there is at the beginning, but how much love there is at the end.

5 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-08-30 12:43 ID:3SkFGOiu

Get over it. Being offended by weed is, like, so authoritarian.

6 Name: Lucas-kun : 2008-08-30 18:46 ID:sAOS3svQ

People don't need durgs. It's a lifestyle choice. Since you don't approve of her lifestyle choice, that means you both have a slightly different set of values.

I could imagine things could get pretty weird between a pot smoking gurl and a non-smoking guy every once in a while... when people don't see eye-to-eye on something, anything, it could be a problem for a relationship. Especially when it's values that you don't see eye-to-eye on, if you feel me here.

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7 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-08-31 01:31 ID:Heaven

Wait, I thought that people with slightly different lifestyles made great couples because they could complete and influence each other, while couples made of people that are too much on the same foot end up in boredom, spite, and eventually faults/breakup.

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8 Name: Lucas-kun : 2008-08-31 01:53 ID:sAOS3svQ


The whole "opposites attract" thing is not really true... I guess it could work, but not usually. As for slightly different, I'm pretty sure that's fine. People can get along if they're different, they just need to understand their differences. Didn't mean to give you that message bro.

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9 Name: Lucas-kun : 2008-08-31 01:56 ID:sAOS3svQ

Also, don't just take my word for it.

10 Name: Akina : 2008-08-31 05:11 ID:YqhWLeN4

>>7 it could be true. But like people, relationships are all different. There is no 'right' way to be in one, because its different from all other relationships.

11 Name: Secret Admirer : 2008-08-31 07:55 ID:wF3c0yMf

OP here

You're very right. After thinking about it the past few days, I've pretty much thought up the same thing. If she does decide to give an actually relationship a chance, then I'd probably request the very same thing, that she doesn't bring it around me and such. I actually haven't been thinking about it as much now, I think I've sorta "gotten over it", heh.

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