I can't take it anymore. I'm so alone, I have no friends, girls don't even look at me. Everybody is having fun, they are full of love, all except me.
I'm a complete failure, 10 years of isolation, I barely finished high school, dropped out of university, and found a stoopid job anyone could do.
There's no way out, I have no idea how people become friends with each other, how they find love. Oh wait, once in 26 years I actually found that.. once in 26.. that means I have to wait another 26 to stumble on a person who likes me, and I'll be old already..
I tried to tell them.. I told them I was alone.. but no one understands.. they think it's some stoopid temporary loneliness.. they are used to have all they want, to find new friends and lovers the same way you download new games from the internet... how could they understand what it means to have no friends, no company, no woman around for the most part of ur life, and not knowing how to find them.
Everybody has a family, friends, a girl, everybody is loved... but me, and I don't know how to get out of this... once you lose all social connections, it's done. It isn't necessary to be a hikki, it just happens, you lose all childhood friends, and zzap you're alone for life.
What I have done to deserve this.
>>1
If you really think you are the only one who is alone then you are just being naive.
Also if they already heard your pleas, don't you think they are your friends already?
I'm alone too (sans family). You get used to it.
Go seek professional help. You say you have a job, so go spend some money on yourself and get help. People won't listen to you because they have too many problems of their own to deal with. I know I'd probably ignore some person I don't know very well if they just came up to me and started to talk about how shitty their life is. It's a bummer to be around such a person, which is probably contributing to your inability to create relationships with others.
Hey man! At least you have a job, I'm still working on that one. Death isn't a solution to anything, only life is worth living, you know. Hang in there! Your life is not what you deserved, it's what you do. What happens to you is your own work. The power is yours, 頑張る!
Also, you never know, you might have a form of chemical depression. You might want to consult a doctor, it's worth a few consultations just to get a professional opinion.
It may seem strange, but we live in an electro-chemical age, and if you have a problem, there's probably an ever-increasing assortment of medicinal ways to fix it.
The only option you have is suicide.
>>6
NO.
>>1
shouldn't you consider the fact that there are people around who actually care about you. for example, your family. your family still care about you.
besides, no one likes sulkers. especially if that person is a man. life isn't fair. SIMPLE FACT. but life is just walls that block your way. it's your choice to climb over those walls.
life is meant for people to live, not die. if you give up now, all your effort before will be meaningless. and also you wouldn't be able to get a good girl for yourself. just go to the love and romance board. they'll give you advice.
No I'm not depressed. I'm frustrated. Imagine a hikki recovering. What the fuck are we supposed to do? WHAT THE FUCK??? I got out of the house. I got the fucking job, it's been almost 2 years and it's been very useful... but now what? I get along very well with colleagues, I actually like them a lot, BUT still no friends, no girl, no social circle at all, I'm still totally alone.
Having a social activity like this job DOESN'T automatically create friends from nothing, in fact it seems to me that everyone already has his life and is not interested in inviting others in it.
WHY THE FUCK AM I NOT ENTITLED TO LIVE A DECENT LIFE LIKE EVERYONE ELSE? WHY AM I ALWAYS ALONE???? THEY SAID IF I GOT OUT I WOULD BE BETTER, BUT NOTHING HAS CHANGED, I LEARNED HOW TO WORK WITH OTHER MEN, AND STILL I'M AS ALONE AS EVER! WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS? WHAT?????????? AND MOST OF ALL: WHERE THE FUCK IS THE DAMN STORE WHERE THEY SELL FRIENDS AND GIRLFRIENDS??????
and also, this board isn't meant for scuicide related problems.
"Do not use this board to discuss your suicide-related problems. You should seek professional help. There are many services worldwide that allow you to talk to professional councellors anonymously, this is not one of them. Check your local phonebook for such services."
shoulda read the top.
Don't you enjoy working with others? That's a life. What happens when you talk to these people? Relationships don't make themselves, they're the result of people who enjoy spending time together.
Unfortunately, none of my coworkers live in this area or city (and most are married anyway.)
Unfortunately, I have no family.
I'm just alone and every time I talk about this it's worse because I can see how you take it for granted to have people who care and love you... like they grow on trees..
I've felt that way myself, but I found that there were ways to break the cycle...
If you're into a particular hobby, try to find a local club or group that's into the same thing, and just start going to meetings; E-mail them and say that you're interested, ask where they meet, and start attending; You'd be surprised at how it can change your life, as you gradually get to know people there... From personal experience, you'll find yourself becoming involved with them, both inside & outside of meetings or gettogethers...
Your co-workers don't live in the same "area or city"?? Well, if they don't even live in the city, that's a problem, yes, but otherwise, it doesn't matter if they're married, that doesn't mean you all still can't go on a trip to something like a concert, or a play or to the movies... If you start spending some time with co-workers, you can also branch out & meet people... If you're looking for a relationship, many co-workers, once they get to know you better, could likely "suggest" someone they know in the same age & such, that's also looking for a relationship...
It's a huge step, to break a static, solid cycle of routine like that... I used to go to work, go home, and go to work again in the morning, and felt like I'd be doing that until the day I die, and never get the chance to meet friends, meet someone special, enjoy things, etc.. (I was in the same situation, where all of my high school friends weren't in the area anymore, and I didn't know anyone) I forced myself to take some big, scary steps, and I've met tons of people, and seen & done tons of things, as a result of taking the risk of going places and trying to be accepted...
Learn from your loneliness. Do not hate it but embrace it.
You are alone because you make yourself alone.
Turn your sadness into happiness.
Love yourself so that others can love you.
>>17
huh.. i'm writing to a person who i don't know or have never seen...
but i don't mind though. he will get through this. i know.
BUT MAN!!! POST TOO LONG??? THE DRAWING IS CUT!!!! NO WAY >0<
Life is meaningless anyways. Win or fail, it doesn't matter. We all die in the end. Not everyone in this world can be happy. If there were no sadness in the world we wouldn't know what happiness is. There's a set amount of happiness in the world and you're not going to get any.
KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!KILL YOURSELF!!!
To make you feel better, I've been a loner for 14 years, the last 10 or so years I started to behave more and more as a hikki, now I'm mild hikki and I couldn't go back and change. I have no friends, no one to talk to. My parents don't even want to talk to me. I have no relationship and never had anything to do with the opposite sex!
I'm stuck in this hole and I can't get out. Experience with people always leave me devastated, it's not that I don't want to socialise, its more or less they aren't interested in getting along with me.
You are lucky you have colleagues and others to talk to.
I'm 16, never had anything to do with girls, and have been pretty much reclusive for 6/7 years (moreso in the last 5 years approx - by then I'd lost contact with my few primary school friends). No parental problems (just your usual doting complaining parents). Only speak to one friend on MSN (my only contact), my only friend left from primary school. I never really explain my problems to them, because I'm not sure about the nature they take. I think I prefer doing things alone (my parents saw signs of this back in preschool) but also have some social anxiety and have been diagnosed with Aspergers (though the symptoms are a bit iffy and some of them I don't relate with at all). I've always been at least a loner in the plain sense. I was least a loner in primary school (high school starts when you're 11 in Britain) but still very similar to the way I feel now.
I post at a schizoid personality disorder forum because I think that's a convenient explanation for my behaviour.
Life isn't meaningless for me unless I'm in a social area. If the rest of my life consisted of 100% social contact, I'd probably feel like warez otoko.
Some of the posts here make me feel better though.
>>23 i feel you, i'm about the same. i dont trust a single person apart from my self because people just cant be trusted
>>23,24
True.
Still, life is a big concrete wall which we have to walk through.
There may be millions of people in this world, but it is harder to talk to people. There may be great technology, but our evolution has halted.
There may be money, but there are sooo many things that you cannot buy with it. There may be you, and your posiblities are endless. What will you do now, in this sophisticated and complex world?
>>1 The world is a scary place, but we MUST face it.
Most of the times I think that my life has been full of hardships. It is, and I look back at the tough moments as lessons.
Loneliness is one of those lessons my friend.
You cannot surrender, you cannot dispose of your body and your life. Once you do it, darkness fades in and you lose everything. EVERYTHING!! You won't have memories anymore, you won't have any feelings, you won't have any senses. You won't be anything. You will be NOTHING and will be recorded in human history as dust.
Life is unfair, live with it. Life sucks, make it seem great.
It's your life, the field where you will do your existance's performance. Would you like people to become surprised by it?
Firstly, look where you are, your circunstances and your mind. Then, move out
Although this may not be the friendliest advice, death is the worst...you think that death may end the pain of loneliness...but it ends everything. When you die...you can't feel anything anymore. You can't think anymore. There most likely isn't an afterlife, where you can be all happy and stuff. You'll just cease to be. As bad as life gets...I am terrified of death...The ability to feel and think and be is more precious than you think...at the moment approaching death, you will feel it begin to all slip away...and then the fear sets in...you will want to change your mind...but you may not be able to. You will have wasted all the opportunities you could have had and traded it for nothing.
However you go out is your own choice. If you want to end your life in one of the most boring ways possible, that's your choice. Just remember that there is a great chance that nobody will be around to rescue you. Like many before you, you'll probably fail and cause permanent damage to yourself. Suicide is not a way to get attention, it's a way to inflict maximum damage upon yourself.
Life is for the living. There is no need to think about death because when it happens, it happens. Nothing you can do about it.
>>26
>>27 is right.
Yet let me tell you something: when you fall into uncounsciousness, the moment when you feel you're letting go is actually something really... enjoyable. Like you're floating and everything gets simple. Of course, when you "come back", the mere idea of having enjoyed this is really, really scary. Yet, you know you did.
I think death feels the same (I'm not talking about a violent and painful death, though I guess in the last moment it could be the same thing). Except you don't come back, aren't scared... and never enjoy anything anymore.
The world is what you make of it, if your depressed or unhappy the only one that can change it is you. No one else, ever. No ones gonna come along and do it for you and you cant escape it in death.
It's your own fault. The only one that can make you happy is you.
i don't know if anyone already said this, : To commit suicide you just have to be brave for 1 sec, but if you choose to live you will be brave every morning when you wake up for another day of your life. Y'know its really dangerous, the world, but we MUST fight to find happiness, i mean.. how could you possibly know how is to be happy with you never had hard moments :P you just need to go trough :D always looking to the forward, keep walking.
Well I am not a loner or anything... But I think people are garbages in the world... Yeah, People like you... I mean you people should have never been born from the beginning... Having thoughts like that... I mean your parents should be ashamed of you for making you losers born to this world.
So just go die already...
That would come from a person that would think negatively...
Of course I am joking but...
I think the above comment might turn out true... If you guys would take the easy way out... I mean you guys post these things on here... So that means that you want others to know right. Because you guys want to be saved.
Well don't just stand there and thinking of those kind of things... I mean I bet you guys never try something new...
I mean if you want to look for better jobs... Then you just need to look really hard...
For friends... Just try being social... Have faith in people... I mean there are bad people in the world... But there are also good people in the world. Try to look for them... Well they are not very hard to find... You just need to know where to look for them...
If you want like a anime or card playing buddies or something... Well try going to anime fares or something.
If you want a friend that fits your interest... Then join a club or something (Yup try joining a club that interests you... I mean there are places like those... Just try hard!)
Or find some net buddies that live close to your place.
For women... There are sites that are for dating... Try joining those... Even those might be a hard thing to do for you guys... But still you want to meet women right. There will be lots of single women in there.
Also try going out side each day for walking or something.
Make a good hobby!
But overall... Try hard!!! You must be committed to this in order to have a life that you might want.
I mean you think killing your self is hard right... But here is a bigger challenge... Try living... I dare you!
Also you think your all alone but your not... What do you call people here that are trying to help you and trying to share a similar probs. with you? It's because we care that we help you people and such... So we are technically your friend... ha ha ha
Well I hope you won't die and well fighting!
This crap pisses me off. Look, just talk to people and make friends. It is not that difficult. You just have to have some balls and take the first step and actual say something. Walking in a bookstore and see someone checking out the manga section? Strike up a conversation. That's how I made most of my friends. You'll find that most anime fans are really talkative and generally nice. All my high school friends either moved away or we just lost contact, so I was depressed for a while just being by myself, but then I realized that are too many people in this world to be lonely. I just went out and went to hot spots where people who shared my interests would go. It's hard the first few times but you just have to push yourself to say the first word, after that everything is easy. Don't let your mind hold you back, I didn't. Now I have a handful of numbers on my cell that I can call at any time to meet up and hang out somewhere.
>>33 may sound harch but his absolutley correct, you just gotta push your self if you want to make friends.
the only option u hav is suicide. simple fact. it reeely helps, trust me. i commited suicide a few years back when i was in a similar situation and now i hav it all. fame, money, fit women. SUICIDE IS THE KEY!!! DO IT DO IT DO IT
Dude, I know what it is like.
I have been isolated for 4 years, no friends, no job, no school and no sex (never).
The outside seems so weird for me and I feel as though it will always be like this.
My life is a downward spiral of shit and I feel as though my only option is suicide.
when the hell is suicide EVER a good thing. My life has sucked crap for the past 2 years, but what the hell would killing myself do? Leave my family with funeral costs and guilt? you kill yourself and all you to is make everyone around you feel guilty about your death
Yeah, and it's not like it'll solve any of your problems either. I mean, if you're a Buddhist/Hindu you get an instant respawn and you're back where you started, and if you're into one of those Abrahamic faiths then you have the whole afterlife crap to go through. Who wants to sit in purgatory waiting for the apocalypse to never come? The Chinese underworld is even worse, it's all endless lines, slow beurocracy, and red tape.
And if you're like me, than you believe in an endless feedback loop, so there's no point to it.
if death is truely the only hope why are you posting here? be an hero.
Cut yourself.
i'll be your friend!
please, a girl i knew just killed herself because she was depressed and i felt terrible because i diddn't do anything to help:(
i have bipolar and had to quit school when i was 14 because of a social phobia that ended up as agraphobia, i diddn't leave my house forever and got so sad, but im a bit better now, i just moved into my first house with my partner and even though i dont have a job and not many friends im glad i am here.
you can email me if you want "pocketofthegoat@hotmail.com"
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I feel the same way as OP. There's some useful advice in this thread. I'm going to work on improving myself and trying to strike up convos with people. Thanks
lmao this thread was made in 2007
I wonder how old the OP is now, are you still alive?
I'm 27 myself and have been alone my whole life and a hikikomori since 12.
What you gotta do OP is get over that feeling and learn to find happiness in solitary life.
You'll realize that it's better to be "alone" that constantly around others.
You don't need others for happiness, just find things in life that bring you happiness and joy.
I really just browsed here out of curiosity. I actually might have read this very thread when I was in high school, and forgot about it because it's uncomfortable to hear about people feeling they should just give up on life. These days I can understand how OP is feeling, getting older and feeling like you're just wasting away your life is tough, and feeling like you could be having a more fulfilling social life. I don't get so choked up over a lack of a social life, too much, I have plenty of friends online. It doesn't bother me too much I don't have any friends irl, except one I hadn't hung out in person with in over a year. Crippling social anxiety is a bitch, though. Being so terrified in public that it's exhausting everytime is no fun.
I'm a transwoman and have been struggling hard through my adult life. Only the past 3 years I've been full time. I was laid off work for that and it's hard for me to get myself back on my feet, because I've always dealt with anxiety, worried people just see me as a timid piece of garbage, and now worried they see me as a freak. Deep down I know I'm not a bad looking person and I'm good at socializing casually, at least once I'm comfortable with someone. Even though I know this, it's hard for me to keep myself convinced. I'm only going to cause myself more regret in the future, nothing should be stopping me from progress.
It's really never too late to realize these toxic mindsets are nothing but toxic, and they do nothing but bog you down from at least being proud of the hobbies and so on you do enjoy, even if your life isn't exactly ideal. You don't need to have a great job, be a social butterfly, or fit the ideal beauty standards! Most people I become friends with online don't fit into any of those, but they are still great people I enjoy the company of, with their own unique personalities/experiences. You should want to improve yourself and your life, but don't get bogged down by what you don't have yet, or for not meeting your goals sooner! It's hard to stay positive in this world, and you never really be able to always stay positive. All any of us can do is try, and no one is truly alone on this.
>>59
I sure as hell hope they are going well. OP would be 10 years older than both of us, so about 37/38.
If OP ever comes back to 4-ch someday to check things out, they better respond!
The idea that there are new human in the same exact position as OP was more than 10 years ago is frightening. The people themselves aren't scary, but the fact that this situation has been constantly recurring for people all over the world without any headway is what is frightening.
And yeah, I think the advise regarding meet-ups with people for like-minded hobbies is probably the best advise. That way, you know that everyone in your vicinity is there for the same reason you are. For example, if you get into WarHammer 40K, once you get your army together you can find a table and wait for someone else who is also looking for a match.
OP is literally me but 10 years in the past
10 years have passed but nothing has changed for people like us there's not place for us in this world
>>62
I've been NEET for over 11 years. KV, no friends, no hope in this world.
even when there is no hope
still there shall be hope
even when there is no solution
still there shall be solution
get out of relative thinking and reach for the absolute
:/
You guys talk about wanting to die so much, and probably think about it all the time. But lets be logical here. If you really wanted to die, you could have easily killed yourself by now. But you haven't. Something is stopping you, something is making you want to live. Figure out what that is, and you'll understand yourself better.
i 795 want to die and 250 want to live and 994207583 want to live good
sage
Death is not guaranteed to end your suffering. If you're unlucky you could end up in a much worse place without the ability to end that experience out of your own volition, so you might as well optimize your i/o system to produce enjoyable feelings during this life. How you do that only you can answer, anyone else can only nudge you towards finding that answer within yourself.
Besides, the grass is always greener on the other side. Even if you obtain all those things you think you're missing, will it make you feel better in the end? For some perhaps, for others it might make their lives even more miserable and for the rest there might be no difference and they still feel that emptiness within.
I recommend studying the repeating patterns in your life and altering them until you find a pattern that fits you. Good luck, may you find your peace and purpose.
Row Row fight the power
Honestly, I self harmed and was like 6.5/10 suicidal (I wasn't actively planning on killing myself but I'd take really stupid risks and just say "if I die, I die w/e") for like 15ish years. Somehow shit just came together. If you just keep moving forward, half assing shit and drifting through life it gets better. Only thing is is that you gotta grab on TIGHT when you see your opportunity. RNGesus can't hate you forever, you'll trip and fall into a good life eventually.
In a world as messed up as ours I’d be surprised if you weren’t suicidal? I was suicidal and would spend hours researching ways to die that would be easy and peaceful. There isn’t really a painless way to lull yourself and when I realised that I stopped being so obsessed with offing myself and focused on just trying to live in the world because I got no fucking choice.
>>73
stfu, asswipe. death is never the answer. if you are feeling lonely and depressed then your choices are wrong. get the fuck out of your comfort zone, and live amongst nature. climb a hill, explore plants, insects, geology, minerals, sit underneath a tree and let your thoughts out of your mind. the world is a beautiful place but not the human society. i'm just waiting for my new bike, once i get it, i'm out of this fucking city.
i just wanna make my parents proud