Making friends (13)

1 Name: Anonymous : 2008-09-07 21:44 ID:sEQRsDEG

How do I go up to somebody and talk to them and attempt to make friends without feeling like they think I'm some sort of weirdo/loser? Not necessarily a woman, because I'd rather be able to talk to people and make normal friends before dealing with trying to get a girlfriend.

Also, whenever I try to hang out with a group of people I feel like I'm that one loser no one likes who just follows everyone around and is an annoying faggot.

2 Name: Anonymous : 2008-09-07 22:20 ID:Sv8XV/Br

You will feel like the odd one out, but the next time you manage to strike up a "hello, hello, nice weather, etc.", just surpress that urge to run or hide or shut up and things will get a little more fun.

3 Name: Anonymous : 2008-09-07 22:48 ID:sEQRsDEG

Alright, I'll take that into consideration.

4 Name: Anonymous : 2008-09-07 23:33 ID:Sv8XV/Br

>>2 here. Well.. I still haven't figured out to get past the bits when you get back home and slip into your nice comfortable chair, sipping a nice hot mug of coffee and then suddenly! Hit by the suffocating fact that you're the most retarded village idiot the world has ever seen and that nice person you were chatting with earlier on may now be stting with a circle of friends laughing their arses off talking about that strange stammering fellow who made absolutely no sense. Woe! Woe!

5 Name: Anonymous : 2008-09-07 23:57 ID:sEQRsDEG

>>4
thanks.

._.

6 Name: Anonymous : 2008-09-08 00:48 ID:Heaven

if you have enough problems socially that you would make a post like this on a messageboard, youre not going to be able to learn any technique that will suddenly enable you to walk up to a stranger and make friends with them. in a big city, no one even does that. walk up to a stranger and start talking, they will generally want nothing to do with you unless they are tourists.

the easiest way for people who have no friends to start making some, is to join a club of some sort. it is much easier to talk to strangers when you know they have a similar interest.

if youre hanging out at bars or parties and you feel like the outcast, its not likely that will change by continuing to go. you cant force yourself to have fun.

7 Name: Anonymous : 2008-09-08 02:57 ID:sEQRsDEG

>>6

I'm in high school. I know people of similar interests and such, but when I try to talk to them I feel sorta like I'm not wanted.

8 Name: Anonymous : 2008-09-08 04:11 ID:Heaven

>>7 your hs doesnt have any clubs? sounds to me like youre the dork (nothing wrong with that) that tries to hang out with the cool kids. dont be that kid, youre laughed at by both sides. you need to find the proper crowd. when youre in hs, outcasts themselves are a fairly large crowd. if it bothers you to hang out with those guys, youll have to be content to be that 'fag who follows everyone around'. i think id probably prefer the outcasts.

9 Name: Anonymous : 2008-09-08 04:34 ID:3tDHWh1a

Hmmm you can try what I did then I had a terrible time talking with people in high school so I gave up ignored everyone and eventually people were atracted to me because they thought I was cool. just standing or sitting in places chilling slowly attracted people to me and the nice part about being cool is you don't have to say much. Homestly I didn't plan it like this I figured human relationships were pointless but now I really value my friends I still can't carry on on intelligent conversations or be socialable in large groups but I don't really want or need to be and I'm sure I'll slowly get better at that with experience anyway. really don't seek out people and friends they will come to you in time just do what you do the best you can. oh and never give up trust your instincts!

10 Name: Anonymous : 2008-09-08 04:39 ID:ixnQab6S

>>9

This is pretty much what I did in high school and it did not improve my situation at all. I just ended up being alone more. I don't think OP should do give up unless he has run out of options.

11 Name: Anonymous : 2008-09-08 10:49 ID:Bt2JmcH6

OP: Don't feel down on yourself when you're approaching people or hanging out. Enjoy the time with them instead of feeling self concious. Maybe the other guys think they're the weird one, too. Not many people are that confident in high school.

Sometimes friends are just the people you sit around with, and maybe one day you'll connect mentally. Until then, enjoy the company.

Becoming really good friends takes time, and you'll get to see who's really a friend worth keeping too.

12 Name: Anonymous : 2008-09-08 21:21 ID:sEQRsDEG

>>8
Pretty much no clubs of anything relevant to my interests. Shitsux.

One or two people try to approach me and hang out with my sometimes, but they are complete fuckups basically actively disliked by everyone, where I'm at a point where I'm basically not cared about/ignored by everyone. I feel that if I try to be outgoing and talk to people like that people will think I'm an annoying faggot.

13 Name: Anonymous : 2008-09-09 01:51 ID:ixnQab6S

>>12
It seems like you're disliked by everyone as well. Except the people that actually try and talk to you. You complain about not having friends when there are people that actively express interest in talking to you and hanging out with you? It seems like you're being picky and just as bad as the people that you say dislike you.

I realize that the people that try to talk to you may not be your ideal companions, but right now it seems the only choices you have are to become friends with them, be alone, or be that guy that people find annoying. You choose. Perhaps since there are annoying people that bother you, you can understand the situation of the people you try and converse with.

This thread has been closed. You cannot post in this thread any longer.