I just thought: my parents aren't going to be here forever. My father is already 72, my mom 63. I'm 25, I'l move out in half a year, after my vocational education finishes.
And the possible loss of my parents give me a very bad feeling in my stomach. Both aren't very healthy.
Anyone else experiencing something similar?
I feel you. I think about it too much and when I do I feel like I need to cry.
Hey OP do u have older brother or sister?
You can always continue living
by being their dependent you know.
Hey everyone,
today I was I visited my dad at the hospital he's currently staying in, and he had a tumour in his lungs. The lab results showing wheter it's malign or not will probably be out on monday.
I also watched the final After Story episode.
I cried during that show, but was just angry and felt down when I heard that about my father. I'm worried more about my mother living alone than anything else. She's pretty stupid and was just taken advantage of before she met my father. Can't imagine her living alone, and I don't want to waste my remaining youth being her nurse.
I know those are bad, selfish thoughts, but I just can't help it. Am I a bad person?
I have some half-siblings on my father's side of the family, but they live rather far away and I don't have good contact with them. I don't really see them as family, although they're for the most part good people.
The only other relatives of mine live 400 km away in another city.
Pretty much the only person I can rely on that's close to me is my only and best friend, we do pretty much everything for each other.
Oh well, life goes on. I don't hope for the best, I just try to deal with things as they come.
I love this board, it's the only place I know where you can talk about your problems without any prejudices.
>>4 don't be so quick to write off your father, he may still be around for a long while.
Besides, don't underestimate your mother, she may have mature over time (and what's in store for her will force her to, anyway). People are often more resilient than you would think. This does not mean that you should not be supportive to your mother, of course.
I think that basically you are scared shit, and try to transfer that feeling into your mother or father. Relax about it and get your act together. Your father will die, then your mother, and one day you will follow suit. These are things we need to prepare for. We can be afraid, but it's not very useful to freak out, or at least not at the sustained level you seem to experience.
Always.
But I can't talk to my father so I'll feel much more terrible when he does die and I'll never get over it.
And I hate my mother so I don't know if I will feel bad at all when she goes. If I'm glad she's gone, won't that make me feel more terrible than currently feeling like a bad son and a terrible human being? I don't want to find out.
>>6 waw, you seem to be in a pretty severe depression. And as usual of depressive people, you're being extremely egocentric. Your father has lung cancer, your mother has to deal with it, and you worry about whether you'll feel like a bad son? Aren't your priorities a bit crossed?
Pull yourself together and go help your mother and father. Worry about your performance when they are dead, and you have the rest of your life to ruminate about it. But for now, act! Go talk with your father, and patch up with your mother, or at least find a way to deal with her.
If really things don't work out, you can still spend the rest of your life spitting into their grave, if that makes you happy.
6 here,
I am not OP.
The post was in response to OP's question.
But yes, I am a severely depressed egomaniac.
Good news:
I was yesterday at the hospital and the tumour can be removed. The operation is friday or beginning of next week.
I hope he's home again for Eastern and will start his chemo therapy some time after the operation.
I think I was also dropped by that girl that I met the week my father got into the hospital the first time. I thought she showed interest in me and could become my girlfriend.
Oh well, life goes on. Thanks for posting in this thread, guys!
>>10 See, don't be so quick in dismissing your father.
I Whish him good luck!
I had the same feeling some years ago, but after thinking about it you just have to accept that everyone dies someday. And when the time comes for your parents you'll hopefully have some friends to talk with.