ITT we make fun of the previous poster's weight (35)

1 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5506 16:26

>>0 was responsible for that solar eclipse yesterday.

2 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5506 17:54

>>1 is of average weight and blends in well with crowds.

3 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5507 15:18

LOL!

4 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5507 15:57

LOL!

5 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5507 16:54

>>4 eats a healthy balanced diet and regularly exercises.

6 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5508 02:53

>>5 orders a baked potato or a side salad rather than french fries at Wendy's.

7 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5508 03:20

>>6 finds it hard to believe that anybody could stand more than 300 calories per meal.

8 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5508 04:04

>>7 seems to weigh a lot, but is immensely tall and it balances out well.

9 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5508 08:55

>>8 's weight is labeled 500 grams, but due to manufacturing defects it is only 496 grams.

10 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5508 13:24

>>9 only looks at his/her body in the mirror from a side view, because god forbid someone else should notice the 1.5 in. deviation from his/her normal stomach breadth.

11 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5508 13:39

>>10
Has a shadow that weighs 42 pounds, which is physically impossible.

12 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5508 14:28

>>11 is said shadow

13 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5508 23:27

>>12 Is another one of those dumb cosplayers.

14 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5509 15:31

>>13 ruins local seismographs.

15 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5509 16:14

>>14 is the main source of gravity in our solar system.

16 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5511 02:27

>>15 is light enough to hang out with >>14 in his orbiting gravitation station, which was built to only hold 1 person.

17 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5511 08:12

>>16 seems to have neglected the fact that >>14's gravitational field is much larger than is required to hold simply one person in orbit around himself, thus making me wonder why he didn't set a larger weight for >>15, or even just include a bunch of elephants. This mistake is most likely due to >>16's massive collection of fat which droops from his forehead down to the top of his glasses. Sweat from his fat forehead often clouds his glasses.

18 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5511 09:35

>>17 generates negative gravity, thus baffling professional physicists.

19 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5511 16:27

>>18 Smuggles illegal immigrants across the border by stuffing them in his fat rolls.

20 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5511 23:10

>>19 leads a massive army of very fat man who stuff many Mexicans in their fat rolls. His personal best is 70 Mexicans on one all-night run.

21 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5512 00:11

>>20 can't run; in fact his primary mode of transportation is a crane-equipped flatbed truck.

22 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5512 05:27

>>21
Plays a real life version of Katamari Damacy by getting objects stuck in fat rolls.

23 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5512 15:34

>>22 Is so fat that when it is daytime at his belly, it is nighttime at his ass.

24 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5512 16:29

It's always high tide when >>23 is at the beach.

You know, because the massive gravitational attraction generated by the bloated sack of ham he calls a body is always pulling the ocean closer to him in a significant way and he's as fat as the goddamn moon shut up its funny

25 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5514 01:30

>>24 has such muscular composition that nothing is able to damage his body. He is also a surfer and thus greatly enjoys time spent when >>23 is at the beach.

26 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5514 17:19

>>25 is a fat Panda.

27 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5515 04:00

>>26 would have typed more, but his mushy fingers were making that rather difficult.

28 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5517 22:29

>>27 Was able to read >>26's post before >>27's eyelids were weighed down by their fat.

29 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5523 13:04

>>28 is yo momma.

30 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9552 22:26

>>29 is so heavy she sink the thread waaaaay down there

31 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9566 19:16

>>30 Jumped in the state of California and caused a false seismic alarm.

32 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9566 19:43

>>31 jumped in Switzerland and caused a false seismic alarm in California.

33 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9567 14:40

>>32 is often found at Walmart with an electric shopping cart.

34 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9567 21:54

>>33 is really fucking fat yo.

35 Name: (*゚ー゚) : 1993-09-9567 22:10

(  ・ - ・ ) >>34, it's not that there's a restrictive pattern, it's just that you're by far the fattest poster in existence with the fattest character in existence. Stop wasting everyone else's food and get rid of your meaningless fucking gut.

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