I've decided that I'm going to make something that will replace me. Please help.

I'm almost 30, I've accomplished nothing, living with my parents, barely made it out of highschool, generally a failure. No one would mind if I was dead. I have some basic electronics knowledge and was working as a repair technician until the pandemic hit. There were so many things I wanted to do with my life, and it doesn't look like I'll ever achieve any of them. It's completely hopeless for me, so I'm sitting down here to study.

As far as I know, there isn't anything out there yet to replace a person, so the only thing I can do is study until I can make it myself. Went on the MIT website to see what subjects they think I need to know to be an engineer, and engineering sounds like it might let me do this. Maybe? I don't know. Point is that I'm going to follow
http://catalog.mit.edu/degree-charts/electrical-science-engineering-course-6-1/
and try to do everything in here. Right now I've got the calculus textbook off their opencourseware thing because that looks like the first step. I want to get done a section a day, and that'll put me at being done in a little over two weeks. If I keep that pace up, I might be done in a year with all the knowledge I need to be an electronic brain scientist. Then I just need to make a brain and a body, easy peasy.

Please encourage me or give me some direction if you think there's a better way. I don't know why I'm alive if I can't do anything.