Thank you all for your support kind people.
If you wish to know, the reason I do not disclose myself upfront is because I am stealth. I do not wish people to know about my condition. Because when people know you are trans they often start acting differently around you.
Disclosing on the first date tends to attract chasers and scares away good and honest men. When I engage in a relationship with a man I want him to know me who I really am as a person so that when I disclose myself to him he is able to make a decision based on me and not on the negative stereotype provided by the media.
>>15 I am blessed with my looks, it is an assumption that many transpeople don't pass. You simply do not notice us because we blend in, we walk among you. You could say I am trans by paying attention to details, but one way or anothere people tend to look more at the general picture, the way you present yourself. Confidence and presentation are the key to passing in public. The only people who read me the last 2 years were fellow transpeople. Very little people know about me. My close family, very good friends, doctors and my employer.
>>12 Well sweetheart, I was never a man to begin with. I always had a female brain. If this puts you off then you are one of those people who prefer the body over the personality. Not that there is much out of the ordinary about my body so it is only the idea of what I once was on the outside that puts you off.
In all honesty, that is a pretty close minded idea.
Today I disclosed to him in the park sitting on the grass. I took it very slowly while holding his hands and looking straight in his eyes. Easing him in on the subject really helped because I did not have to explain to him what transsexualism is, and there is already enough going on in his mind at the moment. I explained him why I told him so late and that I did not decieve him. It is always helpful to present things as positive as possible. So instead of apologizing I said he means so much to me that I trust him with my deepest secrets.
He took it fairly well and was just quiet. I gave him a copy of the book "True selves" and said I will answer all his questions. It was obvious he needed some time alone so I gave him a peck on his left cheek and left with telling him to rest a bit and that I would wait for him on the other side of the park. The hardes part for me was not to cry during this. It is very emotional for me but I do not want his judgment to be influenced by my emotional state.
I sat on a bench thinking about what just happened when about an hour later I felt his hand on my shoulder. I was so happy, he did not run away, he was not angry!
He took me to a cafe where we talked a long time about my past and about our future. He said that he wanted to have children of his own, but that it would be against his judgment to leave a woman just because she is infertile. He told me that despite the difficulties he wishes a relationship with me.
Right now I am over the Moon, thank you all for your support!