For quite some time now, I've been very anti-social.
I have no offline friends, and only 2 friends online. I mean true friends, not the amount of people on my friends list.

I lack ambitions. I have absolutely no hopes for my own future, and there's no jobs I'd like. I still live with my parents and my 3 other siblings, and I'm the oldest child out of them.

But the thing is, I feel perfectly comfortable where I am right now. I don't want to get more social. I don't want to know more people. Talking to people (even online) that I don't know get me very anxious.

I don't feel like I fit in anywhere. I often see things I'd like to "become one of", but then I decide that my interest compared to other people often seems pathetic. For example, one of my friends is very dedicated to Touhou, and I wanna group myself as similar to him. But the biggest folder I have (dedicated to my waifu) isn't even 1GB.

What should I be doing? Should I be finding something I genuinely enjoy doing to improve and get better? Or am I just gonna keep doing what I love doing? Browsing the net, eating the same food, talking to the same people?
It's not that I find it boring, it's just I feel like there is something I should be doing.

I also have this kind of inferiority complex. Just making this thread I felt like I was looking like a retard, not being able to group myself with other people. I fear being called out and called names.
But even calling myself names makes me think of what other people would say. "Oh, you're a self-loathing faggot, how special", if I were to call myself a loser like I'm doing right now.

So basically TL;DR: I want to improve and stop thinking so poorly of myself, but I don't feel like it'd be worth it. I want to feel as pathetic as some of the other people who have it worse than me, to feel belonging, but at the same time I also want not to get worse.