| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks has terminal bonitis.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks has terminal breast cancer.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

Kneeding Squeeks
　　　　　　　　人　　　　　
　　　　　　　（＿_）　　　　
　　　　　　 （＿＿）　　　　
　　　　　　（ ＿＿ ）　　 　
　　　　　　（・∀・　）　
(´・ω・)つ　(・(・ ）　　　　
　　　　　　｜ ｜　|　　　　　　　
　　　　　　（_＿）＿）

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks has just suffered from a critical
|.　V　ﾊ AA failure. I'm not sure if we can save him.
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) I have a rocket in my pants.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks has terminal dingoes kidney failure.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ิω･ิ) Squeeks will never play the piano again.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks will always play the piano again
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ิω･ิ) Squeeks will never play the digeridoo again.
|.　V　ﾊ Thank God...
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) I forgot what I was going to say
|.　V　ﾊ it was hilarious, though.
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

(・∀・) Clonepa? I didn't know you were a doctor...

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) He keeps saying his name is squeeks and stuff
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ิω･ิ) Squeeks needs a brain transplant.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ิω･ิ) Unfortunately, there aren't any to be found in /dqn/.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

(　･ิω･ิ) You over there! Go fetch me a brain, quickly.

(´ﾟωﾟ`) Sorry, we're fresh out!

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks told me that /dqn/ is going to be closed
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks is being taken to court. He is being sued for
|.　V　ﾊ damages for libel, and defamation by a Jisaku Jien
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks is golfing.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks has entered a chrysalis state.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) This thread has ended peacefully.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

　 ∧＿∧　　　∧＿∧　　　∧＿∧　　 ∧＿∧　 　 ∧＿∧
　（　・∀・）（　｀ー´）（　´∀｀）（　ﾟ ∀ﾟ ）（　＾∀＾）
　（　　　　つ┳∪━━∪━∪━━∪━∪━∪━┳⊂　 　 　つ
　　｜ ｜　|　 ┃This thread has ended peacefully.┃　｜ ｜ ｜
　（_＿）＿） ┻━━━━━━━━━━━━━━┻　（_＿）＿）　　　　　

Please do not resurrect it.

Thank you.

　　 , , 　　poor Squeeks!
　（；´д｀）
　Σ⊂彡_,,..i'"':　
　　　　　|＼`､:　i'､
　　　　　＼＼`_',..-i
　　　　　　 ＼|_,..-┘

| ◎∧
|　･ิω･ิ) Squeeks has risen from the dead.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks has left his chrysalis state, but he came out
|.　V　ﾊ in worse condition than he went in!
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

>>23
| ◎∧
|　･ิω･ิ) Squeeks has risen the thread.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

　　　人　　　　　
　　（＿_）　　　　
　 （＿＿）　　　
　（ ＿＿ ）　　　　
　（　・∀・）　＜　My name is Squeeks and my health was restored to 100%!
　（つ　　 つ
　｜ ｜　|　　　　　
　（_＿）＿）

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks saves....
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|) ......money on car insurance!
|__)＿)

　　　人　　　　　
　　（＿_）　　　　
　 （＿＿）　　　
　（ ◎∧ ）　
　|´・∀・) I have terminal bonitis.
　|.　V　ﾊ
　|___:|__|)
　|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Shii has acute moderatoritis. Only deboxification might cure him.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) I'll bump this thread as soon as Squeek's condition changes.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Nothing yet. Sorry.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks has a terminal.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Oddly enough, his terminal squeaks.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) He just rolled over! This is good news!
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´ﾟ ヮﾟ) Now he's begging. It's sooooooo cute!
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Sorry, that was my overweight nurse. It won't happen again, promise.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) 4-ch is dying
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) We should just try to make 4-ch comfortable.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) On the plus side, his death was hilarious.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) I give him 3 weeks. Wait. No. 2 weeks.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) I gave him mouth to mouth.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´ﾟ ヮﾟ) I gave him ass to mouth.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|;´ω`) Will you stop going crazy in there?
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) I don't want to do the barium thing.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

　　　人　　　　　
　　（＿_）　　　　
　 （＿＿）　　　
　（ ＿＿ ）　　　　
　（　・∀・）　＜　My name is Squeeks, and I gave up control
　（つ　　 つ　　　of 4-ch to moot
　｜ ｜　|　　　　　
　（_＿）＿）　

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Only Jesus can help him now.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Jesus just called and said he's too busy.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) I tried to call Buddah to help Squeeks, but he doesn't
|.　V　ﾊ have a phone
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) This thread isn't getting to 1000 before zero hour
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) I missed 50 get
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) We're sending Squeeks to Osaka, where the finest doctors will try
|.　V　ﾊ to help him. We need you to chip in for his bus ticket.
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´ﾟ ヮﾟ) He's back from Osaka. No change to report, except that
|.　V　ﾊ he brought me this cute geisha paperweight!
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) I think his dick just fell off.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|　･ิω･ิ) Never mind, it was just his pancreas.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

[Del]

| ◎∧
|　･ิω･ิ) I may have contracted Squeeks' STDs before he died.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|　･ิω･ิ) Squeeks has suddenly developed Pendulous Scrotum Syndrome.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

　　　人　　　　　
　　（＿_）　　　　
　 （＿＿）　　　　
　（ ＿＿ ） 　　　
　（　・∀・）　＜　Hay guys check these babies out!
　（つ　　 つ　　　
　｜ ω　|　　　　
　（_＿）＿）　

　　　人　　　　　
　　（＿_）　　　　
　 （＿＿）　　　　
　（ ＿＿ ） 　　　
　（　・∀・）　＜　Pretty cool, isn't it?
　（つ　　 つ　　　
　｜´ω` |　　　　
　（_＿）＿）　

　　　人　　　　　
　　（＿_）　　　　
　 （＿＿）　　　　
　（ ＿＿ ） 　　　
　（　・∀・）　＜　Ah..
　（つ　　 つ　　　
　　= = = = ヾ
　（_＿）＿）　= ｜´ω` | I'm getting the hell out of here.

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Okay, NOW his dick has just fallen off.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|　･ิω･ิ) I just got back from Burger King, and I have tremendous gas!
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks is now singing and looking for a full moon.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) ... but its still noon. PREPARE CPR STAT!
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|　･ิω･ิ) Hope you're enjoying the waiting room cable TV. Speaking of,
|.　V　ﾊ I wouldn't go in the men's room for a while. I just laid my own
|___:|__|) high quality cable, if you know what I mean.
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) We have to evacuate the thread.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Or maybe I should just save myself and start anew.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) We would like to know who'll pay for the expenses.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

HULK SMASH!

　　　人　　　　　
　　（＿_）　　　　
　 （＿＿）　　　
　（ ＿＿ ）　　　　
　（　・∀・）　＜　MY name is Squeeks and what the hell, man?
　（つ　　 つ　　　First you kick my ass, and
　｜ ｜　|　　　　　now you're taking my name?
　（_＿）＿）　　

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) >>71 You have terminal bonitis
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|　･ิω･ิ) Hey, who's up for Burger King?
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks is no longer daddy's little princess
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks is no longer mum's little angel.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|　･ิω･ิ) Burger King, tremendous gas, avoid the men's room, high quality cable.
|.　V　ﾊ You know the drill.
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks went to Yoshinoya.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) ...and then to McDonalds
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) ...and after he posted that pinku bento box thing again,
|.　V　ﾊ somebody stabbed him 87 times with a fork.
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) ...his hand cramped up into a withered claw after
|.　V　ﾊ copy/pasting DESU thousands of times in /b/.
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) The 'post happy things' thread broke the sad
|.　V　ﾊ little emo internet. Sorry kids.
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks is in recovery, and just got his 30 day chip.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Nurse! I need a body bag here.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks left his own special brand of high
|.　V　ﾊ quality flooring
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Today I have good news.
|.　V　ﾊ A free bed.
|___:|__|) And a fresh corpse for students' practice.
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Lolocaust has gone AWOL
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Lolocaust was last spotted with Doug
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|　･ิω･ิ) Everyone named Squeeks is dying.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) I'm tired of updating Squeeks's status. Go check on him yourself.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

　　　人　　　　　
　　（＿_）　　　　
　 （＿＿） 　　　
　（ ＿＿ ）　　　
　（　x　_ x）　<　Malpractice!
　（つ　　 つ 　　
　｜ ｜　|　　　　
　（_＿）＿）　　　

| ◎∧
| ｀ハ´) Um... your fridge is all full of dead people.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

　　　人　　　　　
　　（＿_）　　　　
　 （＿＿） 　　　
　（ ＿＿ ）　　　
　（　x　_ x）　<　I'm hungry. Where's the morgue in this place?
　（つ　　 つ 　　
　｜ ｜　|　　　　
　（_＿）＿）　　　

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Squeeks is whinging about something again and he won't shut up
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Why am I waiting for Squeeks in such a moe pose?
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)

| ◎∧
|´･ω･) Maybe I should go back to work some day.
|.　V　ﾊ
|___:|__|)
|__)＿)