ITT we write a book (121)

1 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5183 21:06

>>13 is the main character
>>20 is the main character's best friend
>>71 is the bad guy
>>30 states the plot
>>100 writes the book
>>80 illustrates the cover of the book
everyone else contributes in whatever ways they want to such as: thinking up ideas for the plot, and character development, and writing sections of the book.

2 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5183 21:13

This will never work.

3 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5183 21:40

Too many posts required. Also, "Legend of DQN" was better.

4 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5183 21:42

>>2
History proves otherwise

5 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5183 22:22

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6 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5183 23:41

>everyone else

Too vague. You need to give more specific sections, like ">>47-62 is chapter 3" or ">>68 is the unexpected plot twist."

And leaving all the final writing to one post is just asking for someone to screw it up.

7 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5184 04:14

　　 ∧＿∧
　　（　 ﾟ ｍﾟ）　I'm not really into the whole writing thing.
　　（　　　　）
　　｜ ｜　|
　　（_＿）＿)

8 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5184 04:41

This is really a test to see just HOW individual we are guys! >>1 is trying to help us! I think we should just roll with it and if >>100 screws up then we'll just change it to >>101 and so forth!

9 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5184 04:48

>>1's just a lazy fuck.

10 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5184 08:13

KOYAMA MITSUKI CHAN!

11 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5184 08:41

The real question is how many times will the protagonist hear the lovely cry of "Nii-san!" every paragraph.

If its not at least 10 times, this book will suck.

Also have an opening:
As [protagonist] awoke one morning from uneasy dreams he found himself transformed in his bed into a moe girl.

12 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5184 08:54

ganbare >>13-kun!
suru koto ga dekimasu!

13 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5184 09:39

Λ__Λ
　（　ﾟ mﾟ） I'm not into the whole main character thing.
　（　　　）

14 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5184 11:20

F. O. E.

15 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5184 17:56

>>13 fucked it up!

16 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5184 18:31

The reluctant hero is a staple of good fiction.

LET IT CONTINUE!

17 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5185 00:28

　D A D D Y　　C O O L

　　　　/＼＿＿_／ヽ
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,,.....イ.ヽヽ、ﾆ__ ーーノﾞ-､.
:　 　| 　';　＼_____ ノ.| ヽ　i
　 　 |　　＼/ﾞ（__)＼,| 　i　|
　 　 ＞　　 ヽ. ハ　 | 　 |｜

18 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5185 09:47

　 Λ__Λ
　（　ﾟ mﾟ） I'm not into the whole Daddy Cool thing.
　（　　　）

19 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5185 12:08

So what do we do until the book is done?

20 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5185 12:26

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21 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5185 13:35

　 Λ__Λ
　（　ﾟ mﾟ） uho! ii otoko
　（　　　）

22 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5185 19:36

やらないか?

23 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5185 22:10

（￣へ￣） Hello. I am "Mr. Likes To Age Threads". I do believe this is a thread in need of Age, so I would like to Age it. That is why my name is "Mr. Likes To Age Threads".

24 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5186 15:29

>>23 tl;dr

25 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5186 15:58

>>24 too short; didn't read

26 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5186 20:08

26

27 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5187 00:06

Let's get 100 by NaNoWriMo!

28 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5187 00:10

Suggestion for opening paragraph -

It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents, except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness.

29 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5187 00:21

29

30 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5187 00:21

This is a fast-paced action story about kung-fu fighting. Those cats are fast as lightning.
It's a little frightening, but they fight with expert timing.
The bad guys are funky Chinamen from funky Chinatown. The heroes will chop them up and chop them down using that ancient Chinese art.

31 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5187 00:22

Oh yeah >>71 is their mastermind

32 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5187 01:24

SPOILER

The girl dies in chapter 5.

33 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5187 01:38

Okay so let me try and get this straight so far:

It's a dark and stormy night in London when Standard 4-ch User, who has been suddenly transformed in his bed into a moe girl, reluctantly teams up with her best buddy Takakazu Abe - beloved by fans for his interjection of "Nii-san! Yaranaika?" 10 times per paragraph- to set things right. With their kung fu fighting skills, they battle funky Chinamen from funky Chinatown as they pursue the mastermind of it all, >>71. But in a stunning plot twist Standard 4-ch User dies in chapter 5 and Takakazu Abe becomes the main character, continuing the quest in order to avenge his fallen friend, who he never did get to do it with.

Also DADDY COOL is in there somewhere.

34 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5187 03:14

　　 ∧＿∧
　　（　 ﾟ ｍﾟ）　I'm not really into the whole being a girl who dies thing.
　　（　　　　）
　　｜ ｜　|
　　（_＿）＿)

35 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5187 15:01

The whole chapter 3 is a flashback.

36 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5187 22:51

chapter 2 is 500 pages long

37 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5188 01:57

>>34
Too bad.

38 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5188 05:03

Chapter 4 is -497 pages long.

39 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5188 06:35

　　 ∧＿∧
　　（　 ﾟ ｍﾟ) In the parlor with the rope!
　　（　　　　）
　　｜ ｜　|
　　（_＿）＿)

40 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5188 23:38

Chapter 6 is 5 pages longer than chapter 3 and 8 pages shorter than twice the remainder of the length of chapter one divided by 8.

41 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5189 00:36

The first edition is hardbound and printed on high quality paper. The main body text is set in 13pt Adobe Jenson Pro.

42 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5189 00:38

There is no title! We can't make a book without a title, please provide one in the next post!

43 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5189 01:19

Mountian of Death and Suffering Part 23

44 Name: 43 : 1993-09-5189 03:13

>>1 MUST FAll

45 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5189 04:59

heehee, but what you weren't expecting was that right around the corner would be a crack dealer dealing some crack.

46 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5189 06:42

Arudou Debito is a racist, communist, fascist, white bastard that raped his mother and sister, mutilated and ate six baby children, and is in complete support of genocide of the entire human race.

47 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5189 07:08

>>>71 is a racist, communist, fascist, white bastard that raped his mother and sister, mutilated and ate six baby children, and is in complete support of genocide of the entire human race.

48 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5189 08:41

jjjjjjj

49 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5189 17:01

http://tanasinn.info/wiki/Mountian_of_Death_and_Suffering_Part_23

50 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5189 17:07

thanks it isnt funny until its on the wiki

51 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5189 17:09

also it's good that you got that "it is a mystery" emoticon from SA or i wouldn't know what emotion to feel!!!!!!!!!

52 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5189 17:26

>>50-51
You should write the jokes of the book.

53 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5189 20:50

Grandpa is actually Standard's Grandson. That means that Standard's Junior's brother! Mittens is the love interest so Junior and Standard fight over her until Standard goes to THE REI'S DINER where rei slips a gender reversing potion into his drink. The next morning he awakes to find that he is a girl and goes over to Takakazu Abe's house. The 2 travel down to THE REI'S DINER where they find D A D D Y C O O L and his biker friends VIPPING it up. D A D D Y C O O L tell's Standard that Rei transformed into a giant dragon-penguin and flew to the >>71's Liar, The Mountian of Death and Suffering Part 23, which was ironically not a mountain at all but a huge hole that led to the very core of the earth itself...

54 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5190 01:09

The entire book is written in Anglo-Saxon alliterative verse.

55 Name: 100 : 1993-09-5190 06:21

Hi, I'm >>100, here from the future. I just wanted to let you know that I'm going to ignore stupid instructions like >>36, >>38, and >>54, so don't bother. See you guys later.

56 Name: 100 : 1993-09-5190 07:17

Hi, it's >>100 again. I just wanted to add that the book is going to be four letters long.

kthxbai

57 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5191 18:00

aaaaaaaa

58 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5191 21:08

>flew to the >>71's Liar,

"He works for >>71, and always tells lies. I know this because I asked him if he worked for >>71 and he said no."

59 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5192 12:27

>>71 is going to be a robot of some sort. I just know it.

60 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5192 14:50

There will be cake at the end.

61 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5192 21:58

>>71's body will not be found, so we may re-use him in part 24.

62 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5192 22:38

>>60's cake is a lie.

63 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5193 00:10

No, >>62, you are the lie.

64 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5193 00:50

2^6 get

65 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5193 01:46

>>71 is a panda

66 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5193 03:02

( ・-・) >>34, it's not that there's a restrictive pattern, it's just that you're by far the worst poster in existence with the worst character in existence. Stop wasting everyone else's time and get rid of your meaningless fucking life.

67 Name: ⊂二二二（ ＾ω＾）二二二⊃ : 1993-09-5193 03:54

dongs.

68 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5193 04:03

>>66, you're not being very nice.

69 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5193 04:04

>>66 is surprisingly relevant, actually.

70 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5193 04:08

>>70 is the bone of his sword

71 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5193 04:09

Arudou Debito is a racist, communist, fascist, white bastard that raped his mother and sister, mutilated and ate six baby children, and is in complete support of genocide of the entire human race.

72 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5193 04:13

sugee wwwwwwwww

73 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5193 04:53

　　　　　　　　　ｒ⌒ヽ　(⌒⌒)　ｒ⌒ヽ/,
　　　　 、、;(⌒,　　　　　　　　　　⌒）／）)
、　　　　ヾ(⌒ヽ　　　 　 　　　　　⌒⌒);;）／,
　、＼(⌒ゝ;(⌒ヾ　　　∧＿∧　　　　　 ⌒）／）) .,＜I'm not into the whole running away from
（(⌒-丶(;;;(⌒ゝ;;(⌒(（( ﾟ ｍﾟﾉ'つ　,⌒⌒);;;;;））)⌒)　　explosions thing.
　(;;;;(⌒(⌒;;;(⌒　　　))) つΨ/i　　／　)）⌒)）;;;;）-⌒)）
ゞ　(⌒⌒=─　　　　＜../（⌒）ゝ　　　　─=⌒⌒)ノ;;ノ;;;::)
（(⌒≡＝─.　　　　　　し´　　　　　　─＝≡⌒)丿;;丿ノ
　　 Mountian of Death and Suffering Part 23

74 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5193 08:37

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=ykejacb3

75 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5193 20:51

z

76 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5193 23:05

It was a dark and stormy night.

77 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5194 06:28

hi, I am really looking for a good host that is ad free, allows adult content to be uploaded, and allows the installation of the kusaba script, I am using metrohost.info, and it uploaded without any errors, but when I go to set it up, it says that access is denied, which sucks because I spent all that time uploading it only to have it not work, so if there is anyway I can find a better host, or even a host that has preinstalled kusaba scripts, I just want to create my own chan, something that has not been introduced into the chan world..

78 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5194 18:44

>>77
rofl

79 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5194 20:33

>>77
I want this entire post made the new 'silly anonymous' title for DQN.

80 Name: ginchan o paizuri shite moraitai yo : 1993-09-5194 21:16

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81 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:00

lol

82 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:00

lol

83 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:00

lol

84 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:00

lol

85 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:00

lol

86 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:00

lol

87 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:01

lol

88 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:01

lol

89 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:01

lol

90 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:01

lol

91 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:01

lol

92 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:01

lol

93 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:02

lol

94 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:02

lol

95 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:02

lol

96 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:02

lol

97 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:02

lol

98 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:02

lol

99 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:02

lol

100 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:02

lol

101 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:02

lol

102 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:03

lol

103 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:04

thread ruined, lol

104 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 11:07

Quick, somebody update the wiki with this important news!

105 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5195 12:47

>>100
Cool. I love short books.

106 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5197 06:09

Is this anything like Hawaii 5-0?

107 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5197 08:43

One Hundred Sexy Girls

108 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5197 12:07

>>2 here

I told you it wasn't going to work.

109 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5197 15:33

It worked great!

110 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5198 16:27

You should make a fuckup-proof re-do of this sometime.

111 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5201 06:19

Mountian of Death and Suffering Part 23
By >>56

sage

112 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5201 06:21

Mountian of Death and Suffering Part 23
By >>55

Chapter 1

It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents, except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness. Thus it was when Standard 4-ch user awoke from uneasy dreams to found himself transformed in his bed into a moe girl. She had no time to ruminate on this unusual development before Takakazu Abe burst into the room, and cried "Nii-san! Yaranaika? Nii-san! Yaranaika? Nii-san! Yaranaika? Nii-san! Yaranaika? Nii-san! Yaranaika? Nii-san! Yaranaika? Nii-san! Yaranaika? Nii-san! Yaranaika? Nii-san! Yaranaika? Nii-san! Yaranaika?" as he launched a flying kick at the window, shattering it and fatally injuring the funky Chinaman attempting to pry it open fron the outside.

**Publisher's note: Due to ongoing financial difficulties, Takakazu Abe's subsequent interjections in every paragraph have been omitted from this edition of Mountian of Death and Suffering Part 23. We beg your understanding, and recommend that you purchase the DQN Press hardcover edition of Mountian of Death and Suffering Part 23 for the full Mountian of Death and Suffering Part 23 experience.

Bleeding from 17 cuts caused by the shards of glass now covering the room, Standard 4-ch user roused herself from bed and walked over to the mirror to begin fondling her new breasts. "I'm not really into the whole being a girl thing, but I could get used to this," she mused.

"You look different, Nii-san. Yaranaika?" Abe observed.

"It must have been that bastard Junior," Standard said. "I bet he slipped something into my drink at that shady diner we went to last night. I'm not really into the whole going for drinks at a diner thing, but Mittens insisted."

The two got into their mecha and headed to THE REI'S DINER in Funky Chinatown, leaving a swath of destruction in their wake.

Chapter 2

As the two entered funky Chinatown, their mecha were accosted by funky Chinamen. But they fired heat-seeking missiles and rendered the funky Chinamen into thin smears on the pavement. They continued on unhindered.

Standard 4-ch user and Abe entered the diner to find ＤＡＤＤＹＣＯＯＬ sitting at the bar, surrounded by a crowd of VIPPERS. The hostess was nowhere in sight, but the corpse of a large onigiri lay disemboweled on one table, its face twisted in pain. Several of the VIPPERS were feasting on its entrails.

Abe went over, mounted the corpse and began thrusting while Standard steeled her delicate self against the gruesome sight, then pushed her way through the crowd to converse with ＤＡＤＤＹＣＯＯＬ. "hello im daddycool the VIPPER join my community of VIPPERS if you payme enough i will give you access to a secret area of VIP QUALITY," the net idol greeted her cordially.

"I'm not really into the whole secret area of VIP QUALITY thing," Standard said, flashing a 10000 yen bill. "But I need information."

ＤＡＤＤＹＣＯＯＬ took the bill and slipped it into his pants. "teh rei transformed into a giant dragon-penguin and flew off somewhere," he told Standard.

"Thanks, that was very specific and helpful," Standard replied. She left and got into her mecha.

Abe, having finished with the corpse of the onigiri, went over to ＤＡＤＤＹＣＯＯＬ and pulled out ten 10000-yen bills. "I'd like the special service," he said.

113 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5201 06:21

Chapter 3

"What now?" Standard 4-ch User mused, sitting in the cockpit of her mecha. "I don't know were teh giant dragon-penguin went. I'm not really into the whole being out of leads thing. Maybe I should just go home and fondle myself some more."

Then she remembered the words of wisdom of a great man - her mentor long ago. "Equip drill attachment," she told her mecha. She closed her eyes in solemn remembrance. Then she stood tall and pierced the heavens.

There was a tearing sound. The sky fell, narrowly missing Standard as it flattened TEH REI'S DINER and tore a huge gaping hole into the earth. Several seconds later, a deafening boom sounded from below as the sky met resistance.

"I hope Abe and ＤＡＤＤＹＣＯＯＬ made it out okay," Standard said. "I'm not really into the whole killing my friends thing." She peered into the newly created hole. Far below, a light glimmered.

Standard engaged thrusters and began flying carefully down into the pit. It took what seemed like an eternity to near her destination. The glimmering light slowly resolved itself into letters, at first too small to read. They were carved out of marble and illuminated by floodlights.

As Standard flew closer and closer, she read the letters: "FUCKIN' JAP."

"Arudou Debito. That bastard," said Standard.

Chapter 4

Standard 4-ch user landed her mecha in the docking bay of Arudou Debito's Liar. "WELCOME TO THE MOUNTIAN OF DEATH AND SUFFERING," read a large plaque. "PLEASE NO FOOD OR DRINKS PAST THIS POINT." As she exited her vehicle, she was immediately assaulted by funky Chinamen, who had wisened up after their first encounter and now knew not to tangle with her in her mecha. What they didn't count on was her mastery of kung fu.

Standard was not the equal of her friend Abe in this ancient art. She had not reached lightning speed, but was only about as fast as a hurricane, and her timing was slightly inexpert. She wasn't really into the whole kung fu thing, to tell the truth. It's just that Mittens thought guys who did martial arts were hot.

Still, her skills were more then sufficient to defeat these yellow slanty-eyes. Half of them fled upon witnessing her first fatality. She chopped up and chopped down the rest with ease, except for one.

"Hold it," she told the last surviving Chinaman. "Why's this place called the Mountian of Death and Suffering? It's in the middle of the Earth."

"Mister Debuto believes the notion of mountians being an anticline landform is a primitive jappo myth," replied the Chinaman. His English was perfect, with a slight Texas twang.

"That's not how you spell or pronounce 'mountain'", pointed out Standard.

"I before A, except after C," said the Chinaman. "What are you, some kind of grammaria-" He got no further before Standard's fist of iron shattered his skull with a single blow.

"The Elitist Superstructure does not mourn your death," said Standard. She continued onward into Arudou Debito's Liar.

114 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5201 06:22

spoilers
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Chapter 5

Standard 4-ch user waited. The lights above her blinked and sparked out of the air. There were chinamen in the liar. She didn't see them, but had expected them now for years. Her warnings to Grandpa were not listenend to and now it was too late. Far too late for now, anyway.
Standard was a weeaboo for fourteen years. When he was young he watched the massacres and he said to dad "I'm not really into the whole rape of nanking thing daddy."
Dad said "No! You will BE KILL BY CHINAMEN"
There was a time when he believed him. Then as he got oldered he stopped. But now in the space station base of the UAC she knew there were chinamen.
"This is Grandpa" the radio crackered. "You must fight the demons!"
So Standard gotted her palsma rifle and blew up the wall.
"HE GOING TO KILL US" said the chinamen
"I will shoot at him" said the commie and he fired the rocket missiles. Standard plasmaed at him and tried to blew him up. But then the ceiling fell and they were trapped and not able to kill.
"No! I must kill the chinamen" he shouted
The radio said "No, Standard. You are the chinamen"
And then Standard was a zombie.

Chapter 6

Takakazu Abe encountered the zombie of Standard 4-ch User outside Debito's liar. Soaked in blood, and wielding the dismembered leg of a funky Chinaman as a club, he stopped short as he saw her. "You look different, Nii-san," he said, staring at her blatantly exposed armpits.

"I have this urge to groan and shamble menacingly towards you. But I'm not really into the whole eating of brains thing," Zombie Standard said.

"Good, because I could never fight you, Nii-sa... no, Standard... no, you have a name, don't you?" Abe scratched his head with his weapon, making a faint squelching sound.

Zombie Standard blushed. She stared at him adoringly with eyes that were slowly becoming glazed over from death.

"I'll call you by it just as soon as I remember it," promised Abe.

"It's Hakurei. Reimu Hakurei," said Zombie Standard.

Abe bade her a tearful farewell and ventured grimly forth into Debito's liar.

115 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5201 06:22

Chapter 7

Takakazu Abe stared at his nemesis with steely eyes. "I knew we would meet again," he said.

"I have never forgotten," intoned the dread lord Arudou Debito. "The day long ago, when you reamed me in the public baths. Without using lube. It was because I was a gaijin, wasn't I?"

"Sort of," admitted Abe. "I thought you Americans were tough enough."

"Thanks to you, I found my calling in life," said Debito. "I killed my family. I killed your family, too. And I will kill everyone else on this cursed planet. Then no one will be left to discriminate against me!" He laughed maniacally, then sobered up. "I'll have to become a guilty-coinscience liberal and start discriminating against myself," he mused.

"You turned my best friend into a zombie," Abe growled. "Wasn't it enough when you mutilated and ate my six baby children?"

"It will never be enough," said Debito.

"Then one of us will die here," said Abe. "And it will not be me."

"Ready!" said a wizened old man on the side of the chamber. The two took fighting stances. The wizened old man lifted a flag and brought it down with a chopping motion. "Fight!"

Abe began the fight with Doton Shinjuu Zanshu no Jutsu. But Debito was already using his Byakugan to read Abe's movements and skillfully dodged. He executed the Hakke Rokujuu Yonshou on Abe. But Abe had used Kawarimi no Jutsu and had substituted himself with Debito's inflatable love doll. Debito did not realize his mistake until he had punctured the doll beyond repair.

"MY KYOKO-CHAN!" screamed Debito. "YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS!"

Debito charged at Abe and scored a direct hit with Kanashibari no Jutsu. He prepared to deal a finishing blow to the staggering Abe, but Abe managed to execute Mugen Sajin Daitoppa. A large vine burst from the chamber floor and embedded itself in Debito's rear end. But this did not stop Debito from using his secret technique. "Debito Ninpocho; Shihou Hapou Shuriken no Maki," he said.

Shuriken flew at Abe from all directions. There was nowhere to dodge, nowhere to run. Thinking quickly Abe used Hakke Shou Kaiten, repelling the shuriken. One embedded itself in Debito's leg, crippling him. Abe moved in for the kill.

"Not so fast," Debito said. "Mugen Sajin Daitoppa." He opened his mouth and vomited sandy death in Abe's direction.

Abe stared at Debito with his Sharingan. "Sabaku Kyuu," he replied. The sand surrounded him, turning him into a mummy-like figure. He continued advancing towards Debito.

"Sabaku Sousou," said Debito. Nothing happened. "No! This cannot be! My sand should crush you into a bloody pulp... no one can survive that technique!"

"I have only one word for you," Abe said. He dropped his pants. His erect member was also covered in a thick layer of sand. He grabbed Debito's shoulders and rotated him around, then bent him over.

"Yaranaika?"

Chapter 8

abe takes off his shirt and hes ripped. ok so some fine bitch comes in and starts grinding abe. abe says yaranaika and hits that. well guess what the dime was actually zombie standard 4-ch user. abe fucked zombie standard 4-ch user (who reverted to being a man 24h after undeath) and he liked it. thye do it again and get gay married

116 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5201 06:29

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention Abe survived when the falling sky crushed TEH REI'S DINER because he left the premises to accompany ＤＡＤＤＹＣＯＯＬ to his secret BDSM dungeon of VIP quality.

117 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5201 07:44

　　　-‐‐- 、
／　　　　　ヽ
!　 !　人|,.iﾉl_ﾉ）
i 　乂-‐　−! i
＼ヽ .ゞ　- ﾉノ 　Sorry, we're all out of VIP, BDSM, and DADDYCOOL.
　　｀｀フ　i´
　 　 / ＼ﾉゝ
　　/__i |丱!|
━━つ━つ━━∞∞∞========

118 Name: （　・∀・）　 : 1993-09-5201 08:56

This brought tears to my eye.

*****, would read again

119 Name: This post sucked. : 1993-09-5877 06:18

This book sucked.

120 Name: heh man!fi.Jek4HW6!!gGKYHXFO : 1993-09-5877 19:21

>>119

FAH WASTE OF TIE

121 Name: ( ˃ ヮ˂) : 1993-09-5878 00:20

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