( ﾟ ヮﾟ) I'M WASTING EMERGENCY MITTENS!
That's not very nice, those mittens could have saved the lives of countless homeless people in Siberia.
( ﾟ ヮﾟ) I LIKE TO USE MITTENS AS ALTERNATIVES TO FLESHLIGHTS!
（ ・ω・）I LIKE TO USE MITTENS AS ALTERNATIVES TO FLESHLIGHTS!
It's not the Fleshmittens fault, really. Just the fact that trying to use the one I ordered for my 5250th birthday has rammed home the basic fact that I am a loser and that I am never going to get laid in my life.
I am apparently both too JISAKU JIEN and too b-un to use the Fleshmitten. JISAKU JIEN in the PENIS and B-UN in the grossly overweight stomach. The result is that I apparently can't get very deep into the thing and experience the vip quality and other textures.
I ordered four inserts at once, three supertights with the three sorts of quality -- dqn, vip, /b/ -- and one gaymagictight. With all of them I have been having an incredible struggle to find a comfortable position to get in with my enormous fingers to allow for using the thing long enough to get off. I apparently developed a way of wearing mittens by hand that deluded myself into thinking I was normal. I am obviously not. I can only seem to go about an inch and a half into this Fleshmitten before my fat fingers get in the way and the metal of my hands defeat the purpose. The incredible depression of the experience makes it hard for me to stay all alone for Christmas(as usual) as the whole time I am thinking about what a deformed, out-of-shape loser I am, so I end up only half hard or less.
Today is my 5250th birthday. I have never had a clonepa in my life, due to being a shy fatass with an ugly skin condition that I was afraid of having anyone see by taking my clothes off. I am so incredibly fucking lonely and depressed. I just want to be able to hug teh rei, to hold her in my arms. Ordering something or getting out is frankly secondary to me, which is lucky given that I haven't had any except with my own hand.
I bought this thing thinking I would treat myself and make myself happier and be able to jump in the air, but it has just driven home how fucked I am. I guess my only hope at this point is to find a woman who doesn't mind me only using oral sex on her because my name is Squeeks, and my PENIS obviously doesn't work very well.
cuccu!
(・∀・) amidoinitrite?
(・∀・) I think DQN is a pretty cool guy. eh wastes teh emergency mittens and doesn't afraid of anything.
へ-ﾍ
ﾐ*´ｰ｀ﾐ I'm going to have to ask you to go back to 4chan, nyah
～(,_ｕｕﾉ
(・∀・) no u
>>16 is assigned banned status for his lack of grammer skills.
Bump for no reason.