( ´_⊃｀) I will fucking sue you for that.

( ´_⊃｀) OUTLAW CIGARETTES!
( ´_⊃｀) MAKE WEED LEGAL!

My captcha was lumness. I feel like that means something.

( ´_⊃｀) Some artfag tricked me into seeing "Magnum opus"
What a load of bullshit! The name Magnum has to describe bullets or condoms.

( ´_⊃｀) I am going to watch a Dirty Harry movie, just to get that stupid movie out of my mind. A 44 Magnum is the best kind of Magnum.

( ´_⊃｀) People shouldn't be allowed to choose when they die, they should spend their remaining days on life support machines until the Good Lord decides to take them home.

( ´_⊃｀)I want it NOW.

( ´_⊃｀) I'm an unemployed lawyer with 200K in student loan debt. Still, better than being a dirty blue-collar worker who can afford to eat something other than cat food!

( ´_⊃｀) That fat bitch Michelle Obama expects me to eat health food and lose weight! Why don't you tell me that after you eat all that disgusting health food, and you lose some fucking weight you obese hypocritical whore!

( ´_⊃｀) I went to Colorado to smoke some weed, but I got stuck in the damned door.

( ´_⊃｀) We invented apple pie, don't let anybody fool you. Also, if you visit you and don't eat apple pie, you are a terrorist.

( ´_⊃｀) America is the best country in the world at everything! Go buckeyes!

( ´_⊃｀) I'm going to eat hamburger and then crash a muscle car at next bend.

( ´_⊃｀) frrrrrrrrrrrrrap

( ´_⊃｀) Duke Nukem is a cool character.

( ´_⊃｀) Count calories? No way. Since I am not in school, I am not doing any math.

( ´_⊃｀) I'm so sick of feminists and gay rights activists blaming me for being cruel to them. I am also sick of them blaming followers of Jesus. Go ahead and be yourself, just don't expect me to sponsor you! If you really want to make the world a better place, go to one of those strict Muslim countries. They are the ones that are unfair to women and gays.

( ´_⊃｀) Using an automatic rifle and laser to hunt deer is unfair. That is why I have a Barrett sniper rifle with a night scope that can spot a fly from 1000 yards away.

( ´_⊃｀) I almost died of heart attack because of my ample body fat, but doctors saved me. So, I owe them all my money.

( ´_⊃｀) I can conflate “vegan” and “vegetarian” as much as I like, thank you very much.
( ´_⊃｀) I'm vegetarian myself, you see. Except fish. And turkey on Thanksgiving. And steak.

( ´_⊃｀) I have a stash of gold and silver because Ron Paul said that's better than having money in a bank.

( ´_⊃｀) 50. Fat. Diabetic. Ahead of me... on his car that is smaller than mine.

( ´_⊃｀) Thanks for putting a Starbucks across from the Starbucks! Having to cross more than one street is annoying.

( ´_⊃｀) I tried that Alli drug that's supposed to help you lose weight, but it just made me have to shit all the time. How am I supposed to lose weight if I'm shitting out all my nutrition?! What a SCAM!! I'll sue...

( ´_⊃｀) I wholly support the Second Amendment.
( ´_⊃｀) Militia? That sounds like some terr'ist thing.
( ´_⊃｀) We need a vastly expensive military that invades foreign countries for our defense. Cutting military funding is not an option, even if the country is in debt.

( ´_⊃｀) Big Pharma's cures work much better than that crap the people call "Holistic medicine."

( ´_⊃｀) I'm from Connecticut. What, don't you foreigners know everything about US geography?

( ´_⊃｀) I want a hamburger, EXTRA LARGE EXTRA SAUCE.
( ´_⊃｀) What do you mean, you only serve gay noodle dishes here?
( ´_⊃｀) Can I get directions to the nearest McDonalds?

( ´_⊃｀) We need to bomb them, for DEMOCRACY. So what if they're dead, as long as they've got DEMOCRACY.

( ´_⊃｀) I ate a salad once because I was told it was good for me. I felt miserable eating it, and afterwards I felt shitty, as well. How can it be good for me if it makes me feel like crap?

( ´_⊃｀) Everytime I go on vacation outside America, i just can't believe how un-American all the non-Americans are. I try telling them the proper way to live and think, but they won't listen! It's an outrage!

( ´_⊃｀) Anime is gay faggot shit for gays, but the word is sort of similar to "America" in terms of spelling, so I support it.

( ´_⊃｀) Being loud is the same thing as being right... USA! USA! USA!

( ´_⊃｀) DA STRUGGEL 2 REAL >>211!!

( ´_⊃｀) School uniforms? Only for annoying snobby private schools and Asians!

( ´_⊃｀) I'm dead tired after work, so I get something from a drive thru window. Now that fucking warthog of a hypocrite, Michelle Obama intends to make everyone spend an hour a day cooking something. You think you know everything about life, but you get vacations and a staff that cooks and cleans for you. Stupid fucking cunt.

( ´_⊃｀) I thought of going to China to marry a wonderful woman. Then, I saw this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_G4S8Kws8o
They became as annoying as American women!

( ´_⊃｀) Why are aircraft engineers given science degrees, yet they fail to make seatbelts that fit? Every time I fly, someone has to find an extension for my seatbelt!

( ´_⊃｀) Why not make a seatbelt that is already long enough for people to use?

( ´_⊃｀) This thread is offensive to me as an American. I will be submitting a petition to the White House to have it removed as well as telling all ten million of my friends on Facebook about this insulting and damaging site. I won't rest until my feelings are vindicated and everyone who disagrees with me is made to suffer.

( ´_⊃｀) I'm glad that there will be a Disney park in Shanghai, China. Chinese tourists piss me off.

( ´_⊃｀) Liquid Smoke is the most patriotic condiment and my tubby hands just unloaded a bunch instead of a dash on my burger so I'll just be here tasting the Stars and Stripes forever!

( ´_⊃｀) Your infrastructure is falling apart because it's a politician's pet project from the 2010s.
( ´_⊃｀) My infrastructure is falling apart because it's a politician's pet project from the 1960s.
( ´_⊃｀) We are not the same.

( ´_⊃｀) 'Baklava'? Just call it a ski mask, fag.

( ´_⊃｀) Don't fool yourselves. We didn't forget about you guys making a holiday to celebrate terrorism in Chicago.
( ´_⊃｀) How about you eat strong dollar instead? Higher for longer, assholes!

( ´_⊃｀) I want my foreskin back!

( ´_⊃｀) Consumer protection laws? That sounds like communism!

( ´_⊃｀) I will own nothing. And I will be happy.

( ´_⊃｀) I have no idea why all these people are bashing white people cause they are white. Its bullshit and racist. Not all white people get away with shit. Sometimes white people are oppressed too! I got called a snow monkey and almost got punched for being white, thankfully I beat his ass.

( ´_⊃｀) It's not doxing, it's accountability, sweaty

( ´_⊃｀) What the hell is the point of crinkle-cutting fries if you won't fry them past "mushy British goop"?

( ´_⊃｀) I'm so happy [criminal nigger] supports trans lives!

( ´_⊃｀) I would never say that I do not want trannies and dark skinned peoples in my bathroom

( ´_⊃｀) Sports we don't win at don't matter.

( ´_⊃｀) Its not a war its just a military conflict

I can't wait for Trump to rape Biden in November so I can murder the tranny nigger on my block...

( ´ω｀) I didn't buy a color TV to watch niggers on it

( ´_⊃｀) We could've had Jeb and secured Haiti's oil for ourselves, just sayin.

( ´_⊃｀) I work 7 jobs. I do 120+ hours a week. I'm happy for I am a real hard-working American patriot. This is what freedom looks like. Maybe you should stop complaining and be more like me you lazy commies. Your just jealous. That's why you want to take my stuff away.
( ´_⊃｀) I don't need no socializers trying to make my life better. Trump is gonna take care of that anyway.

( ´_⊃｀) When it came out that the highjackers were from Saudi Arabia I was confused why we didnt go after Saudi Arabia

( ´_⊃｀) I think that even if they weren't from Saudi Arabia, we should nuke Saudi Arabia anyway... and all countries from 'round there for that matter...

( ´_⊃｀) Empire of Japan is the most evil regime in human history, unlike America. We would never rape and torture people.

( ´_⊃｀) my father didn't buy me a turboman this Christmas. This is literally child abuse.

( ´_⊃｀) sorry but do u know how scary it is expecting a polish blonde lady to be delivering your food to your house only for a MAN to turn up to your address with your delivery?? especially if u live alone and it’s late at night??

( ´_⊃｀) The fuck? Write to an 8th grade level you pretentious fuck.
( ´_⊃｀) No, you're dumbing it down too much. I'm gonna sue ya.

( ´_⊃｀) I just can't afford to have kids right now.
( ´_⊃｀) What? Hispanics on welfare and day labor wages have 4 kids? Careers! Parental care! Exhaustion!

( ´_⊃｀) I'm confused, are you left-wing or right-wing?

( ´_⊃｀) here in california we speak spanish as well as english, uno... dos... hola... uhh mucho gracias... uhh... tengo...

( ´_⊃｀) Why should I have to pay taxes so other people’s kids can go to school? You’re literally Hitler!

( ´_⊃｀) She was 15 years old! This is literally child rape!!!

( ｀_⊃´) She was 15 years old! This is literally child rape!!!

( ´_⊃｀) My truck only takes up two lanes on the motorway, I feel so inadequate.

( ´_⊃｀) THEYRE EATING THE DAWGS

( ´_⊃｀) I think mustard is spicy.
( ´_⊃｀) Well, I think Tabasco is not spicy.

( ´_⊃｀) Inside you are two Americans. Neither one has taste.

( ´_⊃｀) I'm boycotting Heinz. Yeah, only French's mustard for me.

( ´_⊃｀) Bandages? Its just a big conspiracy to weaken the white race. Drinking dog cum will cure dismemberment. I saw it on YouTube.

( ´_⊃｀) ehm its call gahnoo slash leeenuks actually

( ´_⊃｀) ehm its just leeenuks actually

( ´_⊃｀) I think you mean line-ox

( ´_⊃｀) The offer to buy Canada still stands. This is not about making Redcoats pay for bearskins. This is about annoying the redhead with republicanism everywhere he goes.

( ´_⊃｀) Its not obesity. Its maximum liberty.

( ´_⊃｀) Buy my Dogecoins and Bored Apes. Huhuhuh DOGE lol.

( ´_⊃｀) It is reasonable to pay $300/mo. only to be throttled to the 90s AOL experience. Don't you know starving kids in Africa don't have Internet?

( ´_⊃｀) I proudly voted to give Elon Musk full data about every detail of my life which he can now sell to the highest bidder. DEMOCRACY!

( ´_⊃｀) Another plane crash? How could this happen?

( ´_⊃｀) Well, Mr. Pope, if you're so right about Augustine then why are you sick?

( ´_⊃｀) Time to buy a $80,000 truck on a car loan at 300% interest and max out the credit cards. Thank Jeebus I’m not Europoor.

( ´_⊃｀) im trying to get updates on whether world war 3 is on but all im seeing are fat JD vance memes

( ´_⊃｀) Free vaccines? No thanks. I’d rather a dead child than an autist.

( ´_⊃｀) Medically necessary abortions? No thanks. I'd rather a dead mother and child than a dead child.

( ´_⊃｀) Disinfectant? No thanks. Microbes do not exist.

( ´_⊃｀) No I’m not a med student. I buy medical books to look at legal pics of kids’ vaginas.

( ´_⊃｀) I'm going to keep cutting my wrists unless you guys negotiate!

( ´_⊃｀) I heard that the average American eats over 3,000 PB&J sandwiches throughout their lifetime. I've only ever eaten 13 of them, so I'll have to spend this weekend meeting my quota.

( ´_⊃｀) I like driving my SUV/Truck that's as big as a battle tank because it makes my balls feel big and makes me feel manly and rugged when I take it to the grocery store or my office job

( ´_⊃｀) Yeah uhh lemme get a Big Mac, large fries, and a... nother Big Mac, please.