So my little sister is 10 years old, and she has Asperger's. Frickin' whoop-de-doo. I wouldn't have any sort of issue with this, except that my parents use it as an excuse to let her get away with just about anything, because "she's sensitive." She can get kicked out of school for the rest of the day, call another girl a "freaking bitch" (mind you, she's in 4th grade) and blatantly disrespect authority and not have any sort of repercussions.
Of course, when I try to call my parents out on their lack of parenting, my mother claims that I'm playing the victim and that I'm flat out wrong. 4ch, do you see what is wrong with this scenario?
Any advice?
Be a respectable person in every regard. Set an example for your sister, make her respect you. You'll be her role model, she will want to be like you. You won't need to tell her what to do, and if you do, she will listen to you.
Also be nice to her. Don't be indulgent, but be nice. You know?
She might be "special", but that can never be an excuse. However it might mean it will be easier to go about parental guidance in a different way. I have a younger brother with aspergers. He generally respects me and listens to me when I tell him something. But in some areas he's a bit slow to catch on, and he likes to use his diagnose as an excuse.
Still, he could be much worse of, and I know it's largely thanks to good role models that he isn't. And for the record I don't feel your parents on their approach and I understand your frustration. But since your situation is thus, you'll have to tackle it by yourself.
How would you recommend I go about this with my parents? See, they never really learned basic parenting skills- I was independent as a kid, but I pretty much did my own thing, stayed out of trouble, got good grades and the whole deal, so they didn't have much work raising me compared to raising my sister. She either is or has been in all manner of school counseling, outside counseling, etc. and none of it has helped. My grandmother is the only person in my family that sees this situation the way I do, and she's tried telling my dad to get his act together, but no dice.
Anyhow, thank you.
How would you recommend I go about this with my parents? See, they never really learned basic parenting skills- I was independent as a kid, but I pretty much did my own thing, stayed out of trouble, got good grades and the whole deal, so they didn't have much work raising me compared to raising my sister. She either is or has been in all manner of school counseling, outside counseling, etc. and none of it has helped. My grandmother is the only person in my family that sees this situation the way I do, and she's tried telling my dad to get his act together, but no dice.
Anyhow, thank you.
I doubt you can change the way your parents are handling your sister. They have their idea about how to do this. In many regards grownups are more stubborn than kids.
Kids with aspergers are sensitive to impression and input, so they need to get very selective. They have a strong need to find an identity to set themselves into. It's all important to gain their trust and affection. If a kid with aspergers get a strong and trusting relationship to a good individual, they will turn out just fine.
The problem with these kids is that parents are so detached from their kids these days, and only have time for occational bonding, while they still have to spew verbal guidance over them on a regular basis. A kid with aspergers won't listen to words unless the one who talks to them is someone they have deep trust and respect for. But if they do, they will listen ever more closely. Either you have their full trust and respect, or you have none.
>Any advice?
Yes. Suck it the fuck up.
Lmao, pathetic. You sound like a "big sister" instead of a Big brother. Grow up please.
>>9 Makes perfect sense, i'm sorry and also for the way i acted and my language use. You are not pathetic,i am for being an anonymous asshole. Goodluck with your problem.
Peace
Have hot lesbian sex with her and post pics.
That's weird-- my stepsister is also 10, and my parents claim that she has Asperger's. Of course, i think it's a whole load of bullshit--because it gives her everything that she wants, and lets her get away with stuff. i understand ;_; it's not really fair. but the thing bout Asperger's is that someday she'll grow up... i'm hoping, anyways.
Is your sister unpopular or made fun of at school? Because my stepsister is really fucking weird (and that's a strange person herself saying that). Not that i REALLY have a problem with it, but, whatever.
I have a lil cousin with this, and he just entered middle school. I think about him all the time. Compared to his parents, I practically raised him. I taught him things that his parents didnt because they think he is to "sensitive". I helped him, and he looks up to me.
However, he doesnt act like a dummy because he has aspergers.
Assburger's is a yet another made up affliction to excuse poor behavior.
>>16 You anti-psychitary/psychology nuts are as bad as the Truthers.
If you rally want to improve the situation, OP, then show your parents how it's done by being fair with her, while still being sensitive to her lack of emotional and attentive capacity.
Aspergers people are a bitch when they are younger, but they grow up and out of it. Just roll over and take it. There is nothing you can do except bide your time and wait.
Smake the bitch.
Thats how I did it with my cousin. He start acting up, Pow, right in his face.
>>21
Somehow I doubt ejaculating in his face will remedy this behaviour.
Naw, I hit him right in his face (with my hand you pervert)
I aint never thought, touched, or acted like that with my lil cousin ever.
I dont even hug that nigga.
he needs to soldier up.
>>I dont even hug that nigga
That's because you're secretly urging to tap his sweet little ass, and you're afraid it's going to show
Naw, it aint never gonna show.
Doctor says i got somethings called a mircopenis, says not to worry.
yall still gay for me?
It's a pity that this thread got hijacked by lame trolls.
I happen to have a form of high functioning autism similar to Asperger's, and an older brother, so I can empathize with your sister's situation. And I agree that it would be a good idea if you try to set an example to her. I remember I followed my brother in most decisions when I was younger, even if it turned out later on that I would have been better off making up my own mind.
I would also kindly ask you to please be nice to her, despite her attitude. If she's anything like I was, she really can't help it. She wouldn't mean to be a bother, but is just too clueless to realize she's doing anything wrong. Even if it's been explained to her before.
Imagine if someone you trust would consistently tell you you're doing something wrong, but you don't know what it is, or you really can't change it despite trying your best. That kind of pressure can lead to serious self esteem issues. (I know of many autistics that have a very low self esteem.)
Of course you should try to make her do the right thing, but I'm quite sure "showing her who's boss" is not the way to do it. If she's anything like I was, authority is not the problem. I think you might be more successful if you talk to her and try to convince her to do the right thing. Make her realize what she's doing is wrong. Make her understand why it's wrong. And make her understand what she should do instead. And if she does it again, remind her.
I remember one particular time when during some group activity we were handed drinks, and it had been said a few times that we were not supposed to drink before everyone else had something to drink. And less than a minute later, I took a sip all the same, because I somehow just didn't think of it at the moment. It's some kind of absent-mindedness, I think. I know I did get the message, because when I was told again I thought "oh shit, I forgot".
I'm afraid that much of this kind of obnoxious defiance is really something we can't help, and it's just as frustrating to us as it is to you.
I'm no psychologist, though, nor do I know you or your sister. Follow or disregard my advice as you see fit. I'm just sharing my own experiences, hoping they might be of some use to you.
You got to keep the hand strong and you can win.
I hate you, I hate you so very much. I want you to burn somberly within each of the Nine Hells. In each of nine individual fires.
>>28
I'm afraid I'll have to agree with >>29 in not considering yours a very beneficial contribution. You disregard everything that I said and advise exactly how I just explained you shouldn't treat someone with Asperger's.
Considering your reactions to other threads, I notice you seem to consistently disregard the complexity of serious problems, and encourage people to rush into things they should really think through carefully. You should stop doing that. Not everything is a matter of "just doing it".
>>30
Don't worry, this asshat is just some troll fucking around, or perhaps even a bunch by now. Anyone who's read more than one post from this guy knows not to take him seriously
Yall always thinking, but whats the going to do you- it got you into the mess your in...
what you got to do is react.
> Yall always thinking, but whats the going to do you- it got you into the mess your in...
> what you got to do is react.
Aren't you headed off to juvie on an assault charge?
>>32
What you need to do is react? So does that mean that any possible reaction is as good as any other one, now?
Of course not. You need to know how to react. People come here to ask about this. Just telling them to react is not helpful at all.
If you think rash action is naturally more effective than thinking things through before you do something stupid, let alone with the kind of problems you encounter here, then your ideas are as barbaric as your grammar.
>>34
Well put, well put. Let's ignore him now, shall we?
Your heading to juvie for assault? And your telling people that need to react better? So, coming from you, is that a compliment?
as a congenital amputee, married to a man with cp, i can safely say your parents are idiots for coddling someone just because they have a disability.
just remember that it is not actually your sister's fault, and try to treat her like a real human being. she'll appreciate it in the end.
seriously... teach her things. love her. shes your sister. experiment with ways to try and help her .. do activities with her. show her things shes never seen. hug her. kiss her. lover her. she is family.
be the big sister you would want.
Self-diagnosed?
rape her