>>412
Mister Kibble whistled tunelessly as he carefully attached seventeen Happy Pins to his corduroy vest. The vest was already vested with 183 such joyous proclamations, with phrases like "SMILE HAPPY!" and "LET'S FUN!" Not one of them was without an exclamation point. Yesterday had been a slow day, Mister Kibble reflected, but it was important to always replenish the Happiness. You never knew when you might need to give out all 200 pins in one day!
Satisfied with his pinnage, Mister Kibble pulled on the vest, strapped on his Balloon Belt, donned his Happy Hat, and began his greeting practice. "Hello, how are you? No, too aggressive. Hello, how are you? Too creepy. Hello, how are you? There we go. How are you? How are you? Hello! You! How are you? You look happy today! I think you deserve a Happy Pin!" Satisfied, Mister Kibble double checked his supplies one last time and bravely stepped out into the cold gray morning.
Marco stared nervously without hunger at his apple pie. As the waitress walked past she glanced at the uneaten morsel but said nothing. Marco wondered if she saw him shaking. He felt like he was shaking but wasn't sure. Marco was trying to avoid looking at the door but couldn't help watching it in his peripheral vision.
The door swung open and the bell rang. Marco involuntarily jumped in his seat. He felt like he was sweating. A large figure stepped through the door and said, "Morning, Nancy! How's the Happiness today?" Marco stared meaningfully at his pie. It did not give him an appetite. Out of the corner his eye, he saw that the big man was coming his way. Shit. He knew it. Big Nate was fed up with Marco and had sent somebody to do the dirty work. This was it. This Applebee's would be his graveyard.
The large man slowly sidled up and loomed over Marco's table. Marco slowly turned his gaze from the pie to the giant's deadly smiling face. "Hello, how are you?" asked Mister Kibbles. Marco simply stared, his wide eyes filled with mortal fear. "You look a little down, so let's turn that frown upside-down!" Mister Kibbles right hand began to reach down and back toward his Balloon Belt. Marco's eyes carefully followed the hand's trajectory, then suddenly leaped up onto his seat and backed up into the corner, cowering in fright.
"No, please! No!" he cried. Everybody in the diner turned and stared. The quiet murmur of cursory conversation died. "Please! Take anything! Just not my life!" But Mister Kibbles did not blink. Without any change in his demeanor, he pulled out a gun from the back of his Balloon Belt.
"This oughta cheer you up," he said with a wide smile on his face, pressing the barrel against Marco's sweat-soaked forehead. Marco swallowed. The waitress gasped. Coffee went unpoured. Pie went uneaten. Mister Kibbles pulled the trigger.
Marco's brains painted the wall. His corpse slowly sunk down into the booth, no longer shaking with fear. Mister Kibbles took a pin that said "HAPPY DAY!" off his corduroy vest and attached it to Marco's sweater.
"Have a nice day!" Mister Kibbles said, tipping his Happy Hat. He turned to face the diner, whose patrons were staring in shock. "Who wants a balloon animal?"
>>414
Rewrite my story.